HurtingDeeply Posted December 13, 2006 Posted December 13, 2006 (I posted this in LDR too) Ok..it's Tuesday evening..I'm about to break up with him over the phone(it's a LDR of 13 hours). I called a friend to come over & help me through it. It's wierd..I keep saying " I can do it, I need to be without him it just isn't going to work in the future & if I don't end it now I may be taking a chance on it ending in the future." But then, like at this very moment, I keep getting nauseated & can't eat anything and feel like If I don't know what to say, I don't want to hurt him, & I feel like If I break up with him my life will end..and I also realize that if a break-up isn't clean-cut & to the point it will hurt for a really really long time..(i.e. if questions are left unanswered) and so many questions are unanswered..but that's actually the reason I have to leave him. It's because I don't know where our future is headed if I stay with him and that's too big of a risk for us to take. Because chances are the way things have gone, we'll fall right on our face. So it's gotta end now. I just wish I could keep my strength, i'm tearing myself apart. And if he cries or gets mad at me I'm REALLY gonna fall apart THEN. I don't know what to say to him really either..I keep thinking I do; then my mind goes blank. And no matter what I tell myself I keep wanting him. I don't wanna dump him..it's just that i HAVE to. Please Please pray for me. I need it SOOO much. Please respond too cuz Right now I'm freaking out & need my fears to go away BADLY. Love, HurtingDeeply
Speedo Posted December 13, 2006 Posted December 13, 2006 (I posted this in LDR too) Ok..it's Tuesday evening..I'm about to break up with him over the phone(it's a LDR of 13 hours). I called a friend to come over & help me through it. It's wierd..I keep saying " I can do it, I need to be without him it just isn't going to work in the future & if I don't end it now I may be taking a chance on it ending in the future." But then, like at this very moment, I keep getting nauseated & can't eat anything and feel like If I don't know what to say, I don't want to hurt him, & I feel like If I break up with him my life will end..and I also realize that if a break-up isn't clean-cut & to the point it will hurt for a really really long time..(i.e. if questions are left unanswered) and so many questions are unanswered..but that's actually the reason I have to leave him. It's because I don't know where our future is headed if I stay with him and that's too big of a risk for us to take. Because chances are the way things have gone, we'll fall right on our face. So it's gotta end now. I just wish I could keep my strength, i'm tearing myself apart. And if he cries or gets mad at me I'm REALLY gonna fall apart THEN. I don't know what to say to him really either..I keep thinking I do; then my mind goes blank. And no matter what I tell myself I keep wanting him. I don't wanna dump him..it's just that i HAVE to. Please Please pray for me. I need it SOOO much. Please respond too cuz Right now I'm freaking out & need my fears to go away BADLY. Love, HurtingDeeply[/quote Hmm. You're coming from the other side of the fence. Most of us here are dumpees, but I guess the turmoil can be the same from the other end of it. I say that if you TRULY have made up your mind, i.e. know the specifics of why it won't work out, then you're making the right decision for the both of you. It sounds to me that you're really not quite sure. Maybe you could be more specific of why? (if there's enough time of course.) I just don't want you to dump this guy and then take it back. Make sure that you absolutely don't want to work things out. The emotions are normal, you've been attached to someone and will be losing this part of your life. It's not easy. So once again, think it through THOROUGHLY using both your heart and your head. I can tell you that if you go through with it and you really mean it, then there is no easy way to go about it. Both of you will be hurt, there's no getting around it. That's why its so freakin hard to do. But, I can also tell you that if you don't do it now, your suspicions about it being worse later is absolutely true. Make your decision, and stick with it.
D-Lish Posted December 13, 2006 Posted December 13, 2006 Have you thought long and hard enough about it? You didn't mention details of why you want to end it, only that it's the right thing to do. So, it's hard to comment on that aspect of it. All I know is that you should be sure before making the choice. I've dumped somebody before only to regret it immensely afterward...only to find that by the time I realized my mistake, it was too late to make amends. If you have made your choice and you're certain, then you just have to do it. I don't know how long you've been together, but if you still care for the person, it's best to be up front and honest and give him (and you) the closure you need. Be specific about what needs to be said, without being too hurtful. If there is someone else in the picture, I wouldn't tell him so- that will only cause more hurt than is needed. Good luck, let us know how it goes. D
Recommended Posts