Guest Posted December 8, 2006 Posted December 8, 2006 I just ended my 3 year A with my MM. I was wondering what can I expect, as far as feelings, contact, NC, the whole mess. Advice will be very helpful here.
GreenEyedLady Posted December 8, 2006 Posted December 8, 2006 How does one feel after a break up with a single guy? I can't imagine it would be much different...
scaredinlove Posted December 8, 2006 Posted December 8, 2006 I just ended my 3 year A with my MM. I was wondering what can I expect, as far as feelings, contact, NC, the whole mess. Advice will be very helpful here. It is probably not totally over yet, unless you both are very sure of what you are doing and strong, you will still contact each other, maybe even see each other. You will feel very depressed and will crave him and will think no other man will have make you happy, feel angry, sorry, regreat happy all at the same time. Good luck!
pureinheart Posted December 8, 2006 Posted December 8, 2006 Hey Guest.... Well, where are you at emotionally with him now....for me, I had gone through most of the hurt before NC. After that it has been interesting....back when I wanted to follow through with NC, I was unable to because of the hold he had on me, and really was unable to see any light at the end of the tunnel. Now I feel stronger because I have held to NC now for around 3 months. It's not as hard as I thought it would be because I really am DONE. The emotional roller coaster has stopped, I am becoming stable and if I saw him now I would act as if I didn't know him because I really don't. I go through short periods of anger, mainly as the truth becomes more of a reality....the main thing with me is, I was living in anything but reality, so now I must rebuild that. Relief from not living in that lie is the major release, I feel free. There are no guilt feelings where the W is concerned, in a strange way I feel like her and I were in the same boat, as he has cheated on her repeatedly and she took him back every time. I feel like we both got sucked in, but by her staying with him, she is in great need of deliverance/professional help. Now I do feel guilty concerning the BW in this forum because I was apart of a deception that hurt them greatly. Still am in somewhat of a daze, and there are many "auto pilot" days. If you really want out, I would spend most of your free time with continuous self examinations concerning the why's and how's of how you got there in the first place, for the purpose of not repeating this mistake....that is if you consider it a mistake. This forum is a great tool for learning and working out all of the things your going through...communicate in detail if need be, you will get support. GBU.....
movinon05 Posted December 8, 2006 Posted December 8, 2006 How does one feel after a break up with a single guy? I can't imagine it would be much different... I think its a lot different than breaking up with a SG. Because in most cases, you're so in love to even be with a MM. You put up with a lot of lying and deceit and the rejection is much different. In any case, to the poster, you are in for a ride. Even though you will go through many nights crying, you will get tired of it. The first significant thing you will feel, as pureinheart said, is how wonderful it feels not to live with the anxiety. It is quite liberating. Once you get a feel for it, you won't want to go back. You will vacillate between sadness and anger, and sometimes wonder how you got through the day. But the sooner you get into a normal pattern of living, doing things for yourself, getting out with friends and enjoying life, the easier it will be. The most important part of healing is absolute NC!! Don't give in to any kind of contact as it will prolong your progress. Stay strong. You won't regret it.
Chapter2 Posted December 8, 2006 Posted December 8, 2006 Its so good to see you pop back in MO! I miss seeing you around here. I think its a lot different than breaking up with a SG. Because in most cases, you're so in love to even be with a MM. You put up with a lot of lying and deceit and the rejection is much different. In any case, to the poster, you are in for a ride. Even though you will go through many nights crying, you will get tired of it. The first significant thing you will feel, as pureinheart said, is how wonderful it feels not to live with the anxiety. It is quite liberating. Once you get a feel for it, you won't want to go back. You will vacillate between sadness and anger, and sometimes wonder how you got through the day. But the sooner you get into a normal pattern of living, doing things for yourself, getting out with friends and enjoying life, the easier it will be. The most important part of healing is absolute NC!! Don't give in to any kind of contact as it will prolong your progress. Stay strong. You won't regret it.
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