HeadlessZebra Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 Theory says: you're getting all the 2-to-3 callers screened as "predictable" and therefore "no challenge". Theory says: you love challenge, and that's why you'll spend time thinking how come this guy is not calling gorgeous me. Wrong! BAD theorists! BAD! If five days pass and you haven't called, I already forgot all about you. See, your pheromones are lingering in my mind for the first two or three days after you interact with me. After that, they begin to die down. I lose the infatuation. I figure the guy's not interested and therefore neither am I. With not much to fuel the fire, when you call you'll get a lukewarm reception, at best. The spark is dead and just a faint memory. You're no longer "that hot guy from two nights ago... ooh, the possibilities!", you're "some guy who asked for my number a week ago... what was his name again... ahh, who cares."
norajane Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 Sure. You get so much forgetful that you have all your social net find out where I'm at every evening.... More likely, I'd have been out meeting other men, or I'd have been out on a date with a guy who had actually asked me out before I wrote him off. When I was dating, I was a very busy professional who did a lot of business travel. I neither had the time nor the patience to deal with men who couldn't follow through or who couldn't be bothered to make an effort or who sat around waiting for days to pass - I honestly forgot them if I didn't hear from them soon. If they were someone I didn't know at all or didn't know well, they most likely hadn't captured my imagination at the point when they've asked for my number and they're waiting to call me. So why would I care if they did or didn't? I wasn't playing hard to get - I was hard to get because I met a lot of men through my line of work, got asked out a lot, and dated men in cities all across the country. With me, you snooze, you lose. These days, my honey and I have been going strong for years, and neither of us plays stupid head games or metes out affectionate gestures and romance in carefully measured doses to maintain appropriate "interest levels" and othere such nonsense.
gfto Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 The rest of us have forgotten you by the time the 5-9 days rolls around. Not if you were highly intrigued by him and interested in him when you met him. The whole five to nine days thing is designed to weed out women who are going to waste a guy's time. If he waits five or seven days to call, asks her out, and she says "yes," then it's possible that she actually likes him and is a flexible, pleasant person to be around. If she says, "who's this?" or "I would've said 'yes' but you waited too long to call," then she wasn't interested in you to begin with.
HeadlessZebra Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 Not if you were highly intrigued by him and interested in him when you met him. No matter how intrigued I was, you gave it time to die down. You gave me time to forget. You gave the spark time to wane. That's never a good thing.
che_jesse Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 Theory says: you love challenge, and that's why you'll spend time thinking how come this guy is not calling gorgeous me. THEORY SAYS: That's where we want you to be.... You get the award for stupidest thing I've read all week. And people wonder why they are still single...
Antheia Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 Bottom line is: if I'm really interested in you, I will be happy to hear from you the next day, if I'm not, not calling for 5-9 days ain't going to make me interested. Everything else is load of BS.
gfto Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 No matter how intrigued I was, you gave it time to die down. You gave me time to forget. You gave the spark time to wane. That's never a good thing. Give me a break. Suppose you meet some guy at a cocktail party. You have an interesting, funny, pleasant conversation with him. He's very handsome, well-groomed and well-dressed. He has a good job. He made you laugh a lot, but he didn't "hit" on you. He asked for your number, and you gave it to him. He doesn't say he's going to call. He simply says, "it was a pleasure to meet you; enjoy your evening." Six days later, he calls you and asks you out for lunch. I guarantee you will not have forgotten him.
che_jesse Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 I bothered to read though the whole thread this time... Nothing pisses me off more then this crap as far as dating is concerned. I am a very physical person, you need to be in my direct line of sight or you are absolutely nothing to me, I am the type of person that could never ever hold a long distance relationship, I need to touch, see, speak to, and be with the person that I am seeing. It makes no sense to me why you are with a person if your only going to have dinner and screw once a week when you both get off of work on Friday night, it makes no sense. That being said, if you ask for my number and then wait a week to call me when you pick up your phone to do so you will find a message left on day #3 informing you exactly how lame it is to ask for someones number if you are not going to call them and that mind games are stupid bs that have no place with me. I will then promptly delete your number from my cell phone and never pick it up when you call again. I have done this with at least 20 men. If you like someone and want to be with them you need to tell them that.
gfto Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 if I'm not [interested], not calling for 5-9 days ain't going to make me interested. Everything else is load of BS. If you're not interested in him, why did you give him your number to begin with?
alphamale Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 Bottom line is: if I'm really interested in you, I will be happy to hear from you the next day, ...and if you genuinely are interested you'll still be interested when I call 3 months later. I've gotten chicks #s and called them 8 weeks later, took 'em out and then banged them back at their crib. i've also gotten a broad's # then never called her at all. Then i run into her at a party or something 6 months down the road and end up spending the nite in her bed with my semen in all her orifices...
che_jesse Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 ...and if you genuinely are interested you'll still be interested when I call 3 months later. I've gotten chicks #s and called them 8 weeks later, took 'em out and then banged them back at their crib. I've also gotten a broad's # then never called her at all. Then i run into her at a party or something 6 months down the road and end up spending the nite in her bed with my semen in all her orifices... There is a term for the women you are ****ing... "whores". Congratulations of being able to screw people with 0 self esteem and no sense of how they should be treated, a real victory! What a strong, sexxy man you are!
Green Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 I got a girls number and didnt call for 2 months and then banged her. Ive gotten a girls number and never ever called...
HeadlessZebra Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 Give me a break. Suppose you meet some guy at a cocktail party. You have an interesting, funny, pleasant conversation with him. He's very handsome, well-groomed and well-dressed. He has a good job. He made you laugh a lot, but he didn't "hit" on you. He asked for your number, and you gave it to him. He doesn't say he's going to call. He simply says, "it was a pleasure to meet you; enjoy your evening." Six days later, he calls you and asks you out for lunch. I guarantee you will not have forgotten him. Guarantee I will have. I won't reject his invitation, because I'm sure he's not unpleasant and I'd have an OK time, but do you think I'd be going with butterflies in my stomach? Nope. Too late for that! What I'm saying is that waiting might not necessarily kill your chances completely, but it certainly doesn't help them at all. That's my response to Alpha's above reply, too. You got laid despite not calling, not because of it.
gfto Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 Guarantee I will have. I won't reject his invitation, because I'm sure he's not unpleasant and I'd have an OK time, but do you think I'd be going with butterflies in my stomach? Nope. Too late for that! You've forgotten about him, but you won't reject his invitation? If it's too late for the butterflies in your stomach, then why would you bother to go out with him at all?
HeadlessZebra Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 You've forgotten about him, but you won't reject his invitation? If it's too late for the butterflies in your stomach, then why would you bother to go out with him at all? Dude, I just told you. Because I'm sure he wouldn't be unpleasant and that I'd have an OK time. Because there's no reason not to. I date for a fun night out with acceptable company too, you know. It doesn't always have to be flaming lust and stuff. Chances are we'd just end up being "just friends"...
alphamale Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 That's my response to Alpha's above reply, too. You got laid despite not calling, not because of it. well yeah HZ....i mean, I am good looking with a great personality and pretty charismatic when i want to be and smart also. So basically I have the upper hand and get more leeway with chicks.
HeadlessZebra Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 well yeah HZ....i mean, I am good looking with a great personality and pretty charismatic when i want to be and smart also. So basically I have the upper hand and get more leeway with chicks. Thank you. Exactly. Guys with less going for them can't afford to risk hurting their chances by waiting too long. At best, it's something you can "get away with".
nicki Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 Alpha, did you ever think that those chicks would have gone home with ANY guy that night? You were not desired for yourself. It wasn't because you didn't call. It was because you were there. You were used, too...just a dick to them. (Not that I think you would mind that...*smile*) Anyway, I agree that a guy should strike while the iron is hot. Call right away. Start off hot and heavy. I love it when a guy wants me like that. Then I like it when he backs off a tiny bit. Hey, we both have lives, too. Him being busy does keep the interest level up. But you gotta have interest first. If a guy took my number and didn't call for a nine days, I'd lose interest. If he called the next day, I'd think it was because he couldn't wait. That's a compliment. Interest generates interest. Now, if he proceeded to call 3 times a day every day after that, I would probably lose interest. So it's a balancing act. But, I like it when guys call right away after getting my number, and I like it when they call the next day after a date. It just seems like good manners. If you wait nine days to call a woman, be prepared to wait nine days for her to get back to you.
alphamale Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 Alpha, did you ever think that those chicks would have gone home with ANY guy that night? sure...but they wanted ME Anyway, I agree that a guy should strike while the iron is hot. Call right away. Start off hot and heavy. I love it when a guy wants me like that. I don't mean to offend but I don't take advice from females on how to get females... If a guy took my number and didn't call for a nine days, I'd lose interest. oh yeah, so if some famous & rich hollywood actor you love didn't call you for 9 day's you'd lose interest?!? Thats a load of krap!! He could call you whenever he wanted, even 2 years later. If you wait nine days to call a woman, be prepared to wait nine days for her to get back to you. so what? I'll be keeping myself busy with other chicks in the meantime. I really don't give a damn whether she calls back or not.
Green Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 sure...but they wanted ME Of course they did your an alphamale unlike all these beta's I don't mean to offend but I don't take advice from females on how to get females... would you take advice from a fish on how to catch it? oh yeah, so if some famous & rich hollywood actor you love didn't call you for 9 day's you'd lose interest?!? Thats a load of krap!! He could call you whenever he wanted, even 2 years later. Of coarse she'd lose interest what does lots of money, a playboy attitude toward relationships with women and fame have to do with her when she likes NICE Betamale Guys like most of the other women on LS. so what? I'll be keeping myself busy with other chicks in the meantime. I really don't give a damn whether she calls back or not. you mean u dont just wait by the phone for 9 days what if you miss the call?
BenThereDunThat Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 No you can't, not always at least... mmm, yeah, pretty much. If you're after a woman who lives for dating, who lives for men to call her, then no, maybe not. But, if you want to go out with an intelligent, fun, life-loving woman. Yeah. We can pretty much tell when you're playing dumb games. You like me? Call me. Doesn't mean I want to MARRY your dumb ass. If you call me, God forbid, TWO days after the first date instead of THREE, I'm not gonna go, uh oh, he's in love, look out! Run for the hills!! AAAHHH! Seriously. Give me a break.
BenThereDunThat Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 Girls who are inexperienced with dating might not understand that you are calculating your investment for an expected greater return. The rest of us have forgotten you by the time the 5-9 days rolls around. THANK YOU! My point exactly.
alphamale Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 mmm, yeah, pretty much. um, yea...so then what am I doing right now? But, if you want to go out with an intelligent, fun, life-loving woman. Yeah. We can pretty much tell when you're playing dumb games. I dont' agree with that. Depends also on how smart and crafty the dude is... You like me? Call me. Doesn't mean I want to MARRY your dumb ass.
BenThereDunThat Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 More likely, I'd have been out meeting other men, or I'd have been out on a date with a guy who had actually asked me out before I wrote him off. When I was dating, I was a very busy professional who did a lot of business travel. I neither had the time nor the patience to deal with men who couldn't follow through or who couldn't be bothered to make an effort or who sat around waiting for days to pass - I honestly forgot them if I didn't hear from them soon. If they were someone I didn't know at all or didn't know well, they most likely hadn't captured my imagination at the point when they've asked for my number and they're waiting to call me. So why would I care if they did or didn't? I wasn't playing hard to get - I was hard to get because I met a lot of men through my line of work, got asked out a lot, and dated men in cities all across the country. With me, you snooze, you lose. These days, my honey and I have been going strong for years, and neither of us plays stupid head games or metes out affectionate gestures and romance in carefully measured doses to maintain appropriate "interest levels" and othere such nonsense.[/quote] Yep, yep, and yep.....If you're young, new to dating, ok, I'll cut you some slack on this. But when you're older, busy, been working a while, have a life to live? You see all that stuff for the nonsense that it really is.
BenThereDunThat Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 um, yea...so then what am I doing right now? Being your usual annoying, macho self. I dont' agree with that. Depends also on how smart and crafty the dude is... A smart and crafty guy knows how to keep a girl interested without using phone calls (or lack of) as a dating tool. Pblhhh..... It's really just about enjoying people. Enjoying a laugh, a good meal, etc. It's not about who has the one-up on the other, who has a stronger guard up. Maybe that's just me. Maybe I'm just an idiot. That's just the way I see it after all the stupid crap I've done in my life.
Recommended Posts