bluescreenlife Posted December 3, 2006 Posted December 3, 2006 Hi J... I just wanted to let you know, that I'm feeling much better these days and everything is all right with me. I hope you're doing well. I'm not going to put any pressure on us to be friends, but we may run into each other around town sometime, and I hope we can be cool if we do. yours truly, E.
notmakingsense Posted December 3, 2006 Posted December 3, 2006 Who broke up with who? If she dumped you, I wouldn't send the letter -- you may just be waiting for a response/shred of evidence that she's thinking of you -- even if you might not be able to admit that to yourself. If you did the dumping, then telling her that you are feeling better, etc. is a tad bit cruel. So either way, avoid sending notes.... As you can tell, I fall in to the No Contact camp
Author bluescreenlife Posted December 3, 2006 Author Posted December 3, 2006 She broke up with me, but I don't think about looking for her approval or any more contact, I've asked myself if I'd be cool with no reply and the answer is yes. I feel like I've forgiven her and I think expressing that will make me feel better, and make her feel less guilty. Maybe it's my way of saying to both of us that the good times were more important and more lasting than the bad. And that's a better way to say goodbye than what we had. I'm still sitting on this and haven't sent it yet, but I'm letting the idea percolate while I do more interesting things. Overall NC has been really good to me, and I'm not going to try and be friends with her... guess I'd just like to have the past rest in peace. Does that make sense? I suppose it's possible that I'm trying to rekindle things on some level... but I also know I'm also not in love with her anymore, so maybe it's safe to break NC with a nice positive note, a note that that would work well as the end of the whole roller-coaster love song. any thoughts?
notmakingsense Posted December 3, 2006 Posted December 3, 2006 I don't know -- I'm still in the NC camp with this one. It still sounds to me like you are looking for a few crumbs from her that indicate that a distant future with her is possible. Why do you feel it is your job to make her feel less guilty? It is up to the person with guilt to make amends, not the one who has been slighted. If you honestly don't care if she replies or not, then I suppose a letter is Ok -- otherwise, it will only serve to keep an open wound open.
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