stanchain Posted December 1, 2006 Posted December 1, 2006 Ok, I am going to try and give the whole story and hope that some of you out there have some good advice. It all started two weeks ago. After 2 1/2 years of dating my ex decided she needed a week break. To go to her parents and think about if this is what she wants. After two or three days she finally called and we talked, then the next night I had to see her so I could tell her how i felt. Well once I did that I found out she had been kicking it with this guy, who she said was just a friend. the following monday when she was supposed to come back home she said that during the week she was gone I never gave her time to think and she is not sure if she wants this. That she loved me but was not in love with me, and couldnt come home. After that I did a lot of things that were not that smart. Like trying to talk her into coming home and stuff like that. Grilling her about the other guy. things that I did only because I care so much. But I think it just pushed hre away. So since thanksgiving I have not called her. Yesterday she came and picked up all her stuff from the house, And I mean everything. But a funny thing happen afterwords. She called and talked to me. She explained to me that he guy was just a friend. That he wants more than a friendship, but they are not intimant. But yet she is at his parents house all the time kicking it.... but no kssin and no sex... yeah right. He cares about her but she has already explained to him that she needs to get over us, and decide if she is going to come back and things of that nature. Today she called and we talked for like an hour and she talked about how she does care about me. But is just not sure if she wants this. She just wants some time to think about it and maybe she will come back and maybe she wont. But she does not think this is over and doesnt want me to think it is over either. last wednsday when I was dropping her stuff off I told her that I love her, and because I love her I am willing to let her go if that is what is going to make her happy. She said that she didnt want to hug me because she felt that was like saying goodbye... and she was not ready to say goodbye. But yet she wants to know that if she changes her mind that she can come back. whether it is a month or two years from now. She is 21 and I am 29 so I know that she is a little young for a comitted relationship. But over the last 2 years she has talked about marriage and kids... Everybody keeps saying that it is because her age and she needs to experience things. But I know a lot of girls that age that are in comitted relationships and happy. So I am not sure if that is a good excuse. Because before she met me she had been in relationships before... I wasnt her first. We werent fighting before she left, I did do a couple of stupid things that upset her. Had a ******* account, and stuff like that. Maybe even made her feel a lil insecure about our sex life cause I kept wanting to do more. And had some issues with her parents because they did not like me when we first met. So I never really went over there. And her biggest complaint that she said is that she was too responsible for my son because I was always at work. I guess what I am trying to figure out is what in the world do I do? She makes it seem like still cares about me and misses what we had? And lately says all the right things about missing me and such... But will she really ever come back? Or is she just stringing me along? or... or .... or.... Gosh I am so confused.... Please help!!!!
Eric102 Posted December 1, 2006 Posted December 1, 2006 sounds to me she got scared of the marriage life. Yes she is 21 and does sound to young. Most of these relationships are built on giving time to each other. Probaby is afraid that being with you she will live like this forever, this is just my opinion
Eric102 Posted December 1, 2006 Posted December 1, 2006 I would stop contacting her, period. If she comes back then she loves you and will make relationship stronger.
silentalways Posted December 1, 2006 Posted December 1, 2006 my 2 cents. if she loved u she would be with u - simple as that. u know she is with someone else, doesn't want to commit and you have done more than enuff - not to sound harsh about either one of u but she has already made you well aware of what she has decided. u know what u want, she doesn't really, so its time to move on. be polite and just let each other go.
Guest Posted December 2, 2006 Posted December 2, 2006 silent the problem is she will not just let me go. She calls me from time to time to see how I am doing and let me know she still thinks about us.... It is bothersome to say the least because I feel like you fell. If she loves me she would be spending her time with me working on us... not chilling with a guy she says is just a friend.
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