beby24 Posted November 27, 2006 Posted November 27, 2006 Hello everyone, I guess I will start by saying that I am glad to find a place where I can talk to other people that are going through or have experience loveshock as I have learned its called. I am a single mother of 2 girls, I have a 12 yr old an a 2 yr old girl. Its been really hard for me to trust anyone after my ex left me 3 months pregnant and to this day he doesnt know his daughter (his choice) anyway, after i had my baby out of anger i had my tubes tide and I can no longer have kids. I never really thought I would meet anyone again. Well to my surprised I did meet a good guy, with no kids and we have now broken up because he wants kids and being with me and my kids has made him realize this even more. In a way I am so angry at him because I feel he knew this from the begining and now after 7 months he tells me we can't do this. I am so hurt and I just dont know what to do anymore. he calls to see how me and my girls are doing and I am fine until i hear again from him, i try to be so strong but it doesnt work. I feel like I hate him and I just want to move. I am at work crying all the time and I just get angry at my self. I feel like i am going to do something crazy like just pack up and leave. I just dont want to ever hear from him again and I tell him that and then I fell bad. I dont know what to do.
BannaBee57 Posted November 28, 2006 Posted November 28, 2006 I'm sorry to hear about your troubles BEBY24 I guess there is not a lot you can do about this one though. Unless he has a change of heart and realises that you and and your girls are all he'll ever need I think you're going to have to let it go and try to heal. If him contacting you is painful I would suggest telling him so. This is the only way you'll ever get over him. Remember, everything happens for a reason. Getting your tubes tied was a rash decision but who knows...maybe there was a reason for it.
Author beby24 Posted November 28, 2006 Author Posted November 28, 2006 QUOTE=BannaBee57;994724]I'm sorry to hear about your troubles BEBY24 I guess there is not a lot you can do about this one though. Unless he has a change of heart and realises that you and and your girls are all he'll ever need I think you're going to have to let it go and try to heal. If him contacting you is painful I would suggest telling him so. This is the only way you'll ever get over him. Remember, everything happens for a reason. Getting your tubes tied was a rash decision but who knows...maybe there was a reason for it. Thanks, Yes, I know he is not for me, I already know that and I know there is no us. I just have to let him go and for now, no contact is the best for me. I just get so mad and I say such hurtful things to him, which i really dont mean but the thing is that I not only do it to him, i do it to everyone. Like my girlfriend, I told her off yesterday because i been asking her to call this mechanic to check my car which I dont know him she does and she still has not done it, and yesterday I was having one of those days where I feel so alone in this world (but I really am) and i just left her a nasty voicemail. I told her off...
BannaBee57 Posted November 28, 2006 Posted November 28, 2006 Well, that's going to happen and people have to understand that you are going through a really tough time. It will pass though. And soon you'll be back on the top of your game. When you cool down you may want to appologise to your friend though
hollywood24 Posted November 28, 2006 Posted November 28, 2006 Can't they take an egg from your ovaries and be artificially inseminated?
Author beby24 Posted December 5, 2006 Author Posted December 5, 2006 Yes, they can, but its 12,000 a try and the % rate is like 28%. I also called a doctor that would try the reversal and it will cost 12,000. I am doing better after I have had nc with him.
tommyk Posted December 5, 2006 Posted December 5, 2006 I am sorry for what you are going through. I know it is hard and even harder to understand at this time in your life. The old "Time Heals" thing is not an answer you want to hear right now. Besides, it is that over time you find a way to cope with what is hurting you, and I feel that is how Time Heals. He may want his own children, but in my opinion he has made this decision only thinking about himself. His own children with who? He does not even know this yet or so it seems, and besides, he may never meet anyone that will want to have them with him. Remember that if he really loved you it would be for "You" and who you are and all that comes with you, not with what you can't do for him. That to me is a selfish act. Please take care of yourself.
Guest Posted December 5, 2006 Posted December 5, 2006 Don't take this the wrong way, but look at it from a different perspective. Do you really think he knew he wanted kids when he first met you? What is the situation was reversed. A female dating a male with kids. After spending time with his kids the female realises she wants children of her own, but he doesn't want anymore? Is the other persons love enough knowing that staying with them would deny you of enjoying one of the most precious experience in life... of having your own children?
hollywood24 Posted December 5, 2006 Posted December 5, 2006 This is true to an extent. But it can't ALWAYS be about the other person. I know that I want kids, my own kids, and if the person I was with couldn't have kids, how is it going to work when having kids is something I've wanted my whole life? Sometimes you HAVE to stop living for everyone else, and start living for yourself.
Guest Posted December 6, 2006 Posted December 6, 2006 Hollywood24, this was my point exactly. He wants kids. So why deny him. If you love someone, then set them free. So beby24 - move on, he has a life too... just as you do. You've got 2 wonderful kids to bring up.
hollywood24 Posted December 7, 2006 Posted December 7, 2006 Hollywood24, this was my point exactly. He wants kids. So why deny him. If you love someone, then set them free. So beby24 - move on, he has a life too... just as you do. You've got 2 wonderful kids to bring up. I was referring to tommyk's post. Weird, your post wasn't there even after I posted mine
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