nicematters Posted November 27, 2006 Posted November 27, 2006 I am brand new here and this place is really fun to read through...I am enjoying it a lot. Ok, here goes... there is a guy that I think likes me, been trying to figure out if he does or not. I am very new to dating after a long marriage. He is recently divorced as well. He is very friendly and outgoing to all the ladies, except me. He acts a bit shy around me. It would take too long to go into details, but there have been some indications that there is an interest: catching him staring at me, a bit of showing off in front of me, laughing at things I say, ALOT, touching me on the shoulder often....etc. There are several women that have major crushes on him, so I have just kind of decided that I am not going to bother...not interested in competing and playing stupid female games. Yet, he has never really asked any of them out and kind of hangs around me shyly, like maybe he is waiting for me to give a green light of some kind. I am just not sure. I have never, ever dated much, even before marriage, so I have NO CLUE what guys think. Anyway, I want to tell him somehow that I would be interested, but I DO NOT want the other women to know anything about it. I am scared to death. So, first of all, does it sound like he is interested, and secondly, any ideas on how to talk to him with all the vultures hanging around? Thanks!
Pyro Posted November 27, 2006 Posted November 27, 2006 I am brand new here and this place is really fun to read through...I am enjoying it a lot. Ok, here goes... there is a guy that I think likes me, been trying to figure out if he does or not. I am very new to dating after a long marriage. He is recently divorced as well. He is very friendly and outgoing to all the ladies, except me. He acts a bit shy around me. It would take too long to go into details, but there have been some indications that there is an interest: catching him staring at me, a bit of showing off in front of me, laughing at things I say, ALOT, touching me on the shoulder often....etc. There are several women that have major crushes on him, so I have just kind of decided that I am not going to bother...not interested in competing and playing stupid female games. Yet, he has never really asked any of them out and kind of hangs around me shyly, like maybe he is waiting for me to give a green light of some kind. I am just not sure. I have never, ever dated much, even before marriage, so I have NO CLUE what guys think. Anyway, I want to tell him somehow that I would be interested, but I DO NOT want the other women to know anything about it. I am scared to death. So, first of all, does it sound like he is interested, and secondly, any ideas on how to talk to him with all the vultures hanging around? Thanks! He sounds very interested in you. Don't let a bunch of other women intimidate you. Sounds like he is waiting for you to either make an indication that you are interested in him or waiting for you to ask him out. If he was interested in any of those other women, he would have asked one of them out, since you said he is very outgoing with them.
whichwayisup Posted November 27, 2006 Posted November 27, 2006 I take it that you work with him? You didn't say, but I'm assuming... You don't owe anybody (those women) anything, so don't worry about confiding or not confiding in them. What you do is none of their business. You can either start talking to him abit here and there, see how he reacts and flirt with him too, or you can wait it out and see if he asks you out. If he is shy, then maybe that is why he's not too chatty with you.
Pyro Posted November 27, 2006 Posted November 27, 2006 BTW, I am the Riddler, and I want to be the first to welcome you to Loveshack, the most addicting place on earth.
whichwayisup Posted November 27, 2006 Posted November 27, 2006 BTW, I am the Riddler, and I want to be the first to welcome you to Loveshack, the most addicting place on earth. I'll second that! Hope to see you around the watercooler and other fun sections too! Welcome! (Geez, Riddler, I now feel bad as i didn't welcome her here! )
IpAncA Posted November 27, 2006 Posted November 27, 2006 Hey I agree with Riddler on this one. Yep he does sound interested.
Pyro Posted November 27, 2006 Posted November 27, 2006 (Geez, Riddler, I now feel bad as i didn't welcome her here! ) Typical Toronto fan. Just don't let it happen again.
IpAncA Posted November 27, 2006 Posted November 27, 2006 Typical Toronto fan. Just don't let it happen again. Dang it Rid.... I was trying to edit my post:mad:. J/k. I'll try it again Anyhow as I was trying to say...yes this place can be very addicting as I have been on here more then I should have been this weekend. :laugh:
Pyro Posted November 27, 2006 Posted November 27, 2006 Dang it Rid.... I was trying to edit my post:mad:. J/k. I'll try it again Anyhow as I was trying to say...yes this place can be very addicting as I have been on here more then I should have been this weekend. :laugh: Gotta learn to pick up the pace here.
someone2 Posted November 27, 2006 Posted November 27, 2006 Welcome to LS nicematters Don't be reactive! Be proactive! Don't wait for what will happen, or wait for the girls to go away. This can ruin your life. You can always take a small step forward. What you should do depends on your personality. You don't have to ask him out if this is just not you. Do whatever makes you feel comfortable. There has to be something that you can do to make him feel you are there for him. Maybe something as subtle as smiling at him and maintaining eye contact for like 3 or 4 seconds. No man would ever miss that Good luck
Author nicematters Posted November 27, 2006 Author Posted November 27, 2006 Thank you all for welcoming me here....I can already tell how addicting it is. In fact, I was thinking of showing this to a friend at work (one of the nicer ones lol) but then if she were to read this thread, she would know it's me and I don't know if I want that or not. I will think it over. Anyway....here are some more details: I work in a place that is all female, a preschool. (It is awful as far as dealing with nosy people, jealousy, etc.) This man, before I worked there I was told, was very overweight. He has always been very nice and friendly and outgoing. He divorced about a year ago or so. He lost ALOT of weight and now looks really, really good. He is getting tons of attention now. I think he is enjoying flirting and having all this attention (who wouldn't?). He did ask out one girl that used to babysit for him and his ex-wife but she turned him down because she is too good of friends with the ex-wife and didn't want to hurt the ex-wife. He has gone out bar-hopping with another girl and her friends and they hang out together (she has a boyfriend). And then...there is one other woman who really likes him, supposedly. I say supposedly because I think she just likes trying to monopolize his attention. It's not really him she likes, she just likes trying to get men to give all their attention to her. Apparently, he invited her to scuba diving lessons with her, and recently, invited her to go with him to Costa Rica with his scuba diving group. She repeats the flirty conversations he and she have...but, I have begun to question whether these conversations are true or not. They may be, but, when I see the two of them together, she is literally clinging to him and he is trying to get away from her, so I just don't know. He may very well have invited her to these things though, it's hard to tell. However, if he really, really liked her, would they not be dating by now? As aggressive as she is and everything? As for he and I, there have been hints as I have said. It is not easy for me to have any type of conversation with him because the other people listen to everything I say to him. There are a couple of people who would be my ally and maybe help me out in letting him know I am interested, but then again, I don't know that I want anyone knowing about it... Hmmm, I just don't know.
LucreziaBorgia Posted November 27, 2006 Posted November 27, 2006 He is recently divorced as well. He is very friendly and outgoing to all the ladies Expect this from a recently divorced and recently in-shape guy. He hasn't had a chance to play the field and bask in female attention, so I expect that's what he is doing now. He may be reserved with you because he sees you as relationship material and could be shying away from the whole commitment/relationship thing particularly since he just got himself out of one. I don't see this one settling down with any one lady anytime soon. Express interest, date him, etc. Just don't expect him to be too serious about it.
Author nicematters Posted November 28, 2006 Author Posted November 28, 2006 Yes, those were my thoughts.... that he would not be what I am looking for. In fact, when my friend asked me what I would do if he ever did ask me out, I said I might go out with him once, but during the course of the evening try to convey to him that he and I appear to be looking for different things in relationships. That was why I came here for opinions . It's just that there have been these hints from him that I wasn't sure about.
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