db1018 Posted November 26, 2006 Posted November 26, 2006 Me and my H have been separated for about 9 weeks now, he has found a new women to be with and pretty much has moved on. He keeps saying that he will file for divorce but always has some reason not to manly money. I need help dealing with the fact that I am here at home with the kids 4&11 while he is off doing what ever he wants. last time he seen them was a week ago. It eats me up inside to know that he is with someone else, how do you get past that? It consumes almost every thought I have, I know I can't control his behavior and he is wrong in what he is doing, but if you ask him because we are not together it is ok. She knows he is married and has kids and is ok with it for now. Who knows what he has really told her. Our wedding anniversary is Dec 17 we will be married for 12 years, we have been together for a total of 19 years. It just sucks and hurts so bad that he had no problem replacing me with out a second thought. He rewrote our history to say what makes him feel better about what he is doing now, we did have our problems but nothing that could not have been fixed. I feel so weak because if he wanted to come back today I probably would let him. One last note he has only had on conversation with me face to face and that was about 3 weeks ago, other wise it just email and phone calls about money and the kids What's up with him not facing me?
amaysngrace Posted November 26, 2006 Posted November 26, 2006 What's up with him not facing me? He can't face you because he'll see the pain in your eyes and know he's the one who caused it. He is a selfish prick, if you ask me. I know you want your marriage to work but unless he wants that too, it never will. Have you thought about divorcing him? He is playing you for a fool bigtime. Why are you putting up with it? Has he ever strayed before that you are aware of? It seems like he wants the best of both worlds. I would so file for divorce. It will be a huge wake-up call to him. By doing nothing, nothing is going to change. It's up to you to put your foot down. Or allow things to continue as they are. It's your choice.
Author db1018 Posted November 26, 2006 Author Posted November 26, 2006 I would divorce him but I can't afford an attorney to do so, I have seen a few but they want a lot of money up front. I can't seem to move on and forget him.
AriaIncognito Posted November 27, 2006 Posted November 27, 2006 Man, db, I can't even imagine to begin with dealing with what you are going through. All I can say is, try to be strong, for your children. Post here as often as you need to, and hopefully there will be a clearer reason as to why it happened for you in the future. Maybe someone even better is waiting just for you.
Don Quijote Posted November 28, 2006 Posted November 28, 2006 Hi db, My heart goes out to you. I agree with grace that you should file for divorce (and that he is a prick). With respect to the divorce thing, I suggest you go to your local clerk of the court's office and see if they have a self help program anywhere. These programs allow you to file for your own divorce/custody/child support issues at a rate of between $50 - $100 in must jurisdiction. More importantly, it may be wise for you to act know in case he acts first and tries to mess with you having the kids and anything else you may have an interest in (See Britney Spears and K Fed in case you don't think it could happen). Good luck to you
Guest Posted November 28, 2006 Posted November 28, 2006 Me and my H have been separated for about 9 weeks now, he has found a new women to be with and pretty much has moved on. He keeps saying that he will file for divorce but always has some reason not to manly money. I need help dealing with the fact that I am here at home with the kids 4&11 while he is off doing what ever he wants. last time he seen them was a week ago. It eats me up inside to know that he is with someone else, how do you get past that? It consumes almost every thought I have, I know I can't control his behavior and he is wrong in what he is doing, but if you ask him because we are not together it is ok. She knows he is married and has kids and is ok with it for now. Who knows what he has really told her. Our wedding anniversary is Dec 17 we will be married for 12 years, we have been together for a total of 19 years. It just sucks and hurts so bad that he had no problem replacing me with out a second thought. He rewrote our history to say what makes him feel better about what he is doing now, we did have our problems but nothing that could not have been fixed. I feel so weak because if he wanted to come back today I probably would let him. One last note he has only had on conversation with me face to face and that was about 3 weeks ago, other wise it just email and phone calls about money and the kids What's up with him not facing me? cheat on his ass and he will feel what u are feeling... TRUST ME it works and he will see things in a different way....
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