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Posted

After a couple of days of NC, I began to realize just how much I love him. And how a lot of times during the downs in the relationship, I wasn't sure, and I let my bad side come out. Basically, I made myself VERY difficult to live with that past month or so...and I don't blame him for wanting to leave.

 

Honestly a big issue here is my low self esteem. I was so consumed by him that I was sensitive to every swing of his mood...and I let it bring me way down if he was feeling unsure about anything or any less "in love" with me. But that's not the point.

 

The point is, I've been feeling like I really want to reconcile, and I broke down and called him.

 

He picked up and we had a very friendly phone call. Just about how our thanksgivings went, school, etc.

 

Then I stupidly told him I missed him. He said he missed me too, and to "come have lunch with him sometime". Pretty vague.

 

I told him I would, and asked if he wanted to study sometime. Mistake on my part for asking for more concrete plans...but innocent enough. He said he did, and that he'd talk to me later about it.

 

I know I have a lot of my own issues to work through, but I am just tyring to figure out what the hell is going on in his head. Does our exchange mean he wants to be friends? Or did he just not want to be rude?

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Posted

Well, I went online about an hour ago and he IMed me. We had another nice long conversation, no relationship stuff, just more about what we did on the weekend, the Wii, turning 21, etc. I'm hoping this is going in the right direction.

Posted
I'm hoping this is going in the right direction.

Me too. I guess this is a waiting game. Keep working on yourself. :love:

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