Sense&Sensibility Posted November 23, 2006 Posted November 23, 2006 Hello all, I posted a few weeks ago re: a married man I've been friends with for a while. I have feelings for him and I think he feels the same for me too. I interpret eye contact he gives me as a sign that he is attracted to me. I'm not saying just any kind of eye contact, but the kind that lets you know that he really digs you. There has also been subtle signs that have indicated to me that he would like more if he could get a way with it. I was doing really well with looking at him as only a friend, not wanting to develop any more feelings for him. I sort of put up a mental block and was actually believing we could really end up as good friends and nothing else. I was also starting to doubt any of the special attention I got from him previously as he just being a really nice guy. But as of lately I get mixed signals from him. One day he can be really attentive and other days I feel he wants to avoid me as much as he can. My husband and MM really get along well, so I think MM respects my husband enough to not attempt anything foolish. My question is, has anyone ever gone through what I have? and how do you know if this person is struggling to avoid temptation as I am?
Joelle Posted November 23, 2006 Posted November 23, 2006 My question is, has anyone ever gone through what I have? and how do you know if this person is struggling to avoid temptation as I am? I'm going through something similar. Like you, I'm married, too, and so is the other man. For myself, I just know he is attracted to me. I could read it off him. One time, during a meeting, I was listening to him, making normal eye contact. He looked back at me, and couldn't finish his sentences. Also, whenever I walk into a room or area he is in, I feel his eyes on me. He seems to notice me right away when I'm in his presence. Most of the time, I pretend not to notice him, unless we're scheduled for a meeting. Fortunately, both of us are respecting the boundaries.
amaysngrace Posted November 23, 2006 Posted November 23, 2006 A situation I was in yesterday was similar, but I was the one who tried to avoid eye contact with a married man. His wife was there. And if she weren't, I would have been chatting it up with him, no doubt. But she was there and I could feel his eyes on me, but I just couldn't do it because I didn't want to make her feel bad. So I bigtime struggled to not look at him, cause the attraction would be pretty apparent if our eyes met. I think the only way to avoid eye contact altogether is to completely 'try' to ignore the other person. But if your guy is anything like me, he is fully aware of your presence and even your location in the room.
amgine Posted November 23, 2006 Posted November 23, 2006 yes i know what you mean i've had that eye contact thing with my MM friend and the other so called i'm interested in you signs like touching. So far like you we have respected each others boundaries and have never gone that far only as far as hugging. But i believe if we didn't live so close together and i lived on my own things would be different Guess we cannnever know for certain whether the MM is struggling to avoid temptation unless he tells us
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