amaysngrace Posted November 24, 2006 Posted November 24, 2006 So by me calling him and him talking to me but being kind of rude to me, makes me more obssesed for the fact I keep reaching out to him? It sounds like desperation more than obsession actually. Why would you do this to yourself? He's basically telling you to f*ck off and yet you won't leave him alone. You should hope he doesn't have you arrested for bothering him really. Have you ever gone to counseling?
magichands Posted November 24, 2006 Posted November 24, 2006 It sounds like desperation more than obsession actually. I agree. Desperate for his attention?
magichands Posted November 24, 2006 Posted November 24, 2006 dude, give the droll sarcasm a rest for a while... Sorry. I guess I got carried away.
Author Summer2000 Posted November 24, 2006 Author Posted November 24, 2006 I guess I keep reaching out for him to change his mind and tell me he does love me.. But I know deep in my heart that will never happen.. In ways it feels like I am just hurting myself.. I ask myself all of the time why I choose to call him when he will only treat me like crap.. As far as talking to a doctor, I have seen doctors in the past, and it never seems to help.. I know I have very low self esteem, and I am really trying to be strong here.. I know this man was not good for me, but for whatever reason, I still think that maybe he will change his mind.. I know he has good in his heart, and I just want him to notice that I am a good person..
alphamale Posted November 24, 2006 Posted November 24, 2006 I know this man was not good for me, but for whatever reason, I still think that maybe he will change his mind.. I know he has good in his heart, and I just want him to notice that I am a good person.. well basically S2K what will happen is that he'll use you and abuse you at his whim until he gets sick of you and throws you away like a used napkin. trust me, I know....I've done it myself.
Author Summer2000 Posted November 24, 2006 Author Posted November 24, 2006 He already does use me, and I know this.. But why do I let him do this to me? He is nice to me when he wants to have sex, then after we do that he is a jerk to me again.. I just don't get why I allow this to happen.. Why can't I just walk away from him?
magichands Posted November 24, 2006 Posted November 24, 2006 I just don't get why I allow this to happen.. Why can't I just walk away from him? You're desperate for his approval. Or his penis. One of the two. I think we both know which one is the bigger issue.
alphamale Posted November 24, 2006 Posted November 24, 2006 this afternoon I was just desperate to get my hands on a slice of pumpkin pie
magichands Posted November 24, 2006 Posted November 24, 2006 this afternoon I was just desperate to get my hands on a slice of pumpkin pie Was it better than the warm melon?
alphamale Posted November 24, 2006 Posted November 24, 2006 Was it better than the warm melon? not really....getting the cinnamon up the urethra stings a bit.
magichands Posted November 24, 2006 Posted November 24, 2006 not really....getting the cinnamon up the urethra stings a bit. I'm feeling your pain. Spicy isn't always better.
AriaIncognito Posted November 24, 2006 Posted November 24, 2006 You two and your innuendos ;-) Summer, it does seem like you're just obsessed with this man, because you say yourself that you dont even want to be talking to him, and don't enjoy having sex with him. What reason is there really to keep him around, if you dont even enjoy those things, which are pretty fundamental to a good relationship.
Trialbyfire Posted November 24, 2006 Posted November 24, 2006 He already does use me, and I know this.. But why do I let him do this to me? He is nice to me when he wants to have sex, then after we do that he is a jerk to me again.. I just don't get why I allow this to happen.. Why can't I just walk away from him? He's got the control, now take it back. Stop obsessing and start looking at yourself in a positive light, everything that you like about yourself pre-incident. He knew he had the power over you for a year and took complete advantage of it. WALK AWAY with dignity before you do more damage to yourself.
amaysngrace Posted November 25, 2006 Posted November 25, 2006 He already does use me, and I know this.. But why do I let him do this to me? He is nice to me when he wants to have sex, then after we do that he is a jerk to me again.. I just don't get why I allow this to happen.. Why can't I just walk away from him? Because maybe deep down inside you believe this is all you deserve. Look honey, if you're going to be used for sex, at least be with a guy with a lot of money, okay? This way he can buy you pretty jewelry! Nah, just kidding. You need to decide for yourself why you are the way you are. If you've been to doctors and they can't help you, then you need to figure things out on your own. After all, you know yourself better than any doctor does, right? Start by writing down your thoughts and feelings. In a personal journal, not on the worldwide web. If you do just this one small thing for yourself, you will discover a lot about you. Doing this is what really helped me to make sense of my world. I didn't even get a fancy journal, I would just use a spiral notebook and pen. Journaling is the one thing I really credit for my turn about from having low esteem to healthy esteem. You should try it.
Author Summer2000 Posted November 25, 2006 Author Posted November 25, 2006 You know its funny, I look at myself and I know I am a good person.. I am pretty on the outside as I am in the inside... I would give my last dollar to someone who needed it more then me.. I guess thats why I don't know why I allow someone to use me so much and why I can't seem to get over him.. Now Chrismas is coming and I am just feeling worse.. I am having problems eating again and the biggest thing I seem to look foward to is what time I am going to sleep at.. I know I am depressed right now and I am trying so hard to get out of this funk.. Ugh..
amaysngrace Posted November 25, 2006 Posted November 25, 2006 I know I am depressed right now and I am trying so hard to get out of this funk.. Ugh.. If you can, stop thinking about him. Every time a thought pops into your head, remember what a creepy guy he is. He's not worthy of your thoughts. He had a good thing in you and he messed up. His heart's no good and his mind is STUPID! Because he failed to see what a gift he had in you. It's so totally HIS LOSS! Who wants to be with a heartless, dumb loser anyway??
Author Summer2000 Posted November 25, 2006 Author Posted November 25, 2006 Your so cute! Thank you.. I am trying.. I am really trying not to think about him or when I do I try to think of something else.. But it does not seem to help.. I have been dealing with this now for a few months and some days are good but most of my days are bad.. I guess I just need some more time.. I think its offical, I am obssesed with a complete jack as_ !! Lucky me!!
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