noforgiveness Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Ha I bet you OW love mondays and hate fridays whereas I love fridays and hate mondays. There is always that nagging feeling that they are chatting about their weekends together and checking in to say hi to one another. Whereas I'm sure fridays are difficult for you thinking the mm is going home to his family for the weekend.
NoIDidn't Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 I hate Mondays too. Its when I have to lose my H to work and my kids to school. And, when I have to get up early to help make both happen. But I love Monday after 10AM, when I have the house and MY time ALL to myself!!!! On another note: But I think this is meant to hurt the OW. Leave them alone. They have their own crosses to bear. Pointing it out doesn't change anything. I don't condone ANY A, no matter how bad the M. That is what D is for. But badgering the OW/OM doesn't change reality. The reality that some people do engage in As.
Author noforgiveness Posted November 20, 2006 Author Posted November 20, 2006 I hate Mondays too. Its when I have to lose my H to work and my kids to school. And, when I have to get up early to help make both happen. But I love Monday after 10AM, when I have the house and MY time ALL to myself!!!! On another note: But I think this is meant to hurt the OW. Leave them alone. They have their own crosses to bear. Pointing it out doesn't change anything. I don't condone ANY A, no matter how bad the M. That is what D is for. But badgering the OW/OM doesn't change reality. The reality that some people do engage in As. No it wasn't. If i posted this on friday then maybe you could say it was to make them think about them with w but not on a monday when they have the whole week away from home to chat with the OW. I just hate monday and i'm sure they hate friday. Some common feelings we probably hold.
pricillia Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Ha I bet you OW love mondays and hate fridays whereas I love fridays and hate mondays. There is always that nagging feeling that they are chatting about their weekends together and checking in to say hi to one another. Whereas I'm sure fridays are difficult for you thinking the mm is going home to his family for the weekend. No forgiveness, if this is part of your healing then fine so be it. I feel for your pain, I don't however think that this is doing any good what so ever...
herenow Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Hey noforgiveness, I understand and I know what you are saying is true. When I get PM approval, we can discuss this more.
Author noforgiveness Posted November 20, 2006 Author Posted November 20, 2006 Hey noforgiveness, I understand and I know what you are saying is true. When I get PM approval, we can discuss this more. thanks we both seem to have enough posts to be established members maybe it's a time thing now.
NoIDidn't Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 No it wasn't. If i posted this on friday then maybe you could say it was to make them think about them with w but not on a monday when they have the whole week away from home to chat with the OW. I just hate monday and i'm sure they hate friday. Some common feelings we probably hold. I do indeed understand where you are coming from. But I think that OW will take it as a dig against them personally. And I agree, we the Ws have much in common with the OW, being women with feelings and all. Unfortunately, the man in the middle, does much to obscure that view. So I know from experience this topic is not going to generate warm and fuzzies on how much we have in common. Just saying that this can easily be taken the wrong way. That's it.
peacelove Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Absolutely heartless!!!Now you're resembling the OW. The OW that YOU describe as hearltss. Way to go!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ripples Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Just saying that this can easily be taken the wrong way. That's it. And one post later!
Buttaflyy Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Hi Noforgiveness, I have to admit as much as I empathise with you that this is probably not doing you much good. But, generally Monday's pretty much suck for alot of us:p. How are you holding up?
Author noforgiveness Posted November 20, 2006 Author Posted November 20, 2006 Hi Noforgiveness, I have to admit as much as I empathise with you that this is probably not doing you much good. But, generally Monday's pretty much suck for alot of us:p. How are you holding up? Much better today. We really had a great weekend but i still hate mondays.
herenow Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Hi Noforgiveness, I have to admit as much as I empathise with you that this is probably not doing you much good. But, generally Monday's pretty much suck for alot of us:p. How are you holding up? I know that your cute dog just made my Monday a bit better!
Buttaflyy Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Much better today. We really had a great weekend but i still hate mondays. One day at a time . But what's so tough about mondays besides the normal routine? Oh yeah, are you still planning that vacation with the girls? That's something to look forward too!
Buttaflyy Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 I know that your cute dog just made my Monday a bit better! I was going to change him but since he's such a good doggie and is brightening your day... he's here to stay! Thanks Herenow!
BenThereDunThat Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 I didn't think it was intended rudely. I thought it was an effort to find common ground. I hate Mondays now because I have to see the ex. Well, I've always hated Mondays no matter what! Never really hated Fridays before though.
yousaveme Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Ha I bet you OW love mondays and hate fridays whereas I love fridays and hate mondays. There is always that nagging feeling that they are chatting about their weekends together and checking in to say hi to one another. Whereas I'm sure fridays are difficult for you thinking the mm is going home to his family for the weekend. This makes me laugh. You make this statment and then in another post try and cover it up by saying you just hate mondays....Then say that on the Water Cooler. But what else could i have expected.
Author noforgiveness Posted November 20, 2006 Author Posted November 20, 2006 One day at a time . But what's so tough about mondays besides the normal routine? Oh yeah, are you still planning that vacation with the girls? That's something to look forward too! already took the vacation it was wonderful. Very much needed. Felt great then heard his voice when we were back in cell range and it all came crashing back down. Love to escape for longer but sigh kids need me here not playing on an island. Mondays are tough just knowing that they chatted every monday morning about how their weekends were and continued chatting all week long. I know he's commited to me but you still have that nagging of i would never know if she called him or him her.
Buttaflyy Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Now now Ladies, In the words of Rodney King... can't we all just get along??? Seriously, let's not take that to heart and discuss our common hatred of MONDAY!
Buttaflyy Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 already took the vacation it was wonderful. Very much needed. Felt great then heard his voice when we were back in cell range and it all came crashing back down. Love to escape for longer but sigh kids need me here not playing on an island. Mondays are tough just knowing that they chatted every monday morning about how their weekends were and continued chatting all week long. I know he's commited to me but you still have that nagging of i would never know if she called him or him her. I can imagine that it's gonna be like this for a while. You have to build your trust back up and he's gotta do everything he can to gain it back. Is he doing this? You needed that lil time away from it all. Don't feel guilty about it . The kids are fine.
Author noforgiveness Posted November 20, 2006 Author Posted November 20, 2006 yes he calls constantly just to say hi.
Buttaflyy Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 yes he calls constantly just to say hi. That's good! I know it's hard NFG, but it's going to take alot of time, patience and understanding on both parts. I'm glad your feeling a little better at least.
herenow Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 It's very common for BW to have the information they find on phone bills imprinted into their memory. My H picked up a VM from the OW every Monday morning and then returned her call. Actually, there was a VM from her every day, but he only called her back during the week. So I can understand what noforgiveness is saying and I can see how it must have be frustrating for the OW to want to talk to him so bad over the weekend and not being able to do so until Monday.
Buttaflyy Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 It's very common for BW to have the information they find on phone bills imprinted into their memory. My H picked up a VM from the OW every Monday morning and then returned her call. Actually, there was a VM from her every day, but he only called her back during the week. So I can understand what noforgiveness is saying and I can see how it must have be frustrating for the OW to want to talk to him so bad over the weekend and not being able to do so until Monday. Yes, I can only imagine. How did you deal with it Herenow? Is it better to keep checking the phonebill or to trust that he's not calling? I know it's easy for me to say that you have to start trusting, but at the same time I'd probably be checking myself. I think for the time being you should do what makes you feel better, but sometimes what eases your mind now is not so good for the long run.
herenow Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Yes, I can only imagine. How did you deal with it Herenow? Is it better to keep checking the phonebill or to trust that he's not calling? I know it's easy for me to say that you have to start trusting, but at the same time I'd probably be checking myself. I think for the time being you should do what makes you feel better, but sometimes what eases your mind now is not so good for the long run. I obsessed over phones bills for a good 6 months. I brought them with me everywhere I went. I even looked at them while in the school carpool lane. I ordered past bills and check every call he made and every VM he got. I checked on-line daily to see who he had called. I color coded each call he made to me and then to her. I basically tortured myself. One day I realized that the info I got from the bills didn't change anything and it really didn't matter how many times he called her or she called him. On that day, I threw the cell phone bill folder away. But, the memory still hasn't faded.
BenThereDunThat Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Here's something I never understood. When I was still talking to the exMM, we were online almost every night, sometimes until as late as 10:00. And these were the conversations that would get pretty deep about love and physical attraction. So, for one, there's written proof. I never used a fake screen name or anything. If I liked talking on the phone, we would have been on the phone a lot more, I'm sure. He actually commented on how I never called him. ??? Anyway. They don't have any kids, she does work full time. They're fairly new to my city. How did he get away with all this? The drinks after work I can see, it was only for a couple hours at most. But the computer thing. Surely she didn't think he was working all that time? If I were his W, I would totally be snooping. Any thoughts?
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