UnicornGirl Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 I try to keep that in my head ... And it helped when my boyfriend of three and a half years dumped me out of the blue my first week of my freshman year at college. Coming to this site helped too. But shortly after that, my dad left my mom. Not like it was all bad, he was an alcoholic. Six months later I found out he was with a woman he works with. Haven't seen him in a year and a half. Then this past fall got kicked out of school as my parents hadn't paid my tuition and hadn't told me. My mom works three jobs, has no retirement, no nothing, and lives paycheck to paycheck, my little sister is depressed. Had to use all my savings to pay for school this semester, go to private school with mostly privileged kids, and now I have to work all the time and no one understands. Now I'm in a relationship with someone I love. That's great, and we even survived a terrible situation involving me living with a girl that was in love with him and hated my guts even though for a while I thought she was a real friend. Also my 3 best friends couldn't handle me being in a relationship and all turned against me. And now my love is going away in a month, and we won't see each other for seven months. I can't visit him because I can't afford a $2,000 plane ticket. I don't even know what that distance will do to us, or if we'll stay together like we're hoping to. Why do so many bad things happen to us? I browse this site and feel that there's so much pain here. What's it all for? I'm not particularly religious but I feel there has to be a reason ... I just don't know what it is yet. Counseling helps week to week, but overall, I feel so scared and small. And I'm wondering why. Guess I just wanted to send this out into the universe.... and thank you all for being here so we don't feel as alone.
D-Lish Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Sounds like life has kicked you in the ass a little bit of late. Try to think of the positives out of this situation. You are in love with someone who loves you back, that's awesome.... instead of thinking about them leaving. Honestly? 7 months is a short period of time in the grand scheme of things. It'll be over before you know it. You can use that time to make a real effort and dive into your school work. None of these girls are truly your friends if they turned on you. Surround yourself with people that make you feel good about yourself. Not with people who stress you out and make you feel guilty for being happy. Life isn't often easy. You'll get kicked in the ass every so often. But good things happen too- you just have to recognize them and jump on the opportunity. Worry about what you can control and not about what you can't. Girls can be so nasty- but that's not about you, it's about them. Find new friends that make you feel good and support you. D
simonwcc Posted November 20, 2006 Posted November 20, 2006 Its so hard at times, im sure everybody goes through them when everything seems against you, it can be a slow slope down or just one day something happens and then nothing but horribleness for months. I can imagine what your feeling must you must see the good things as Dlish said :-) If you want rainbows you have to have the rain, im a firm believer than you have to have bad periods in your life to see the good for what they truley are...if you went about having good days all the time, surely they would loose their power? We're all dealt our lumps of coal... Hold on in there :-)
Author UnicornGirl Posted November 20, 2006 Author Posted November 20, 2006 Thanks .... Your comments are true and helpful. I guess with my boyfriend I just have to believe more. It's hard when so many bad things have happened lately, and when past relationships haven't worked out, to believe that 7 months can really be nothing in the grand scheme of things. I talked to my counselor today about feeling depressed and it was really helpful -- she said this is a hard time, and I am feeling sad, and should be -- so she wouldn't call this depression. She said if I am sleeping a lot it's okay and that I need the rest. I guess my boyfriend and other people make me feel like I'm depressed and messed up if I'm sad, because they don't understand the pain I am in. Anyway, I will get through this.
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