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what to make of all this ...?

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new guy - new questions ... =)

i've known him for about a year - we are in the same group at college... the fun started at a party where we were both kinda drunk & made out ... then things went back to normal during exams - we talked, flirted a lil, but didn't see each other.

then comes the exam we both have... he was very nice & made sure i'd be at the same party as him the next day. so i saw him the next night, and we had fun again - this time not drunk (he claims he wasn't drunk the first time we made out either btw)


there was another gathering of our group the weekend after, and again - he was all over me - and basically informed our friends that we're going out ... since that day, he's been trying to get together with me every single day... i saw him once with some friends, and he insisted on having a date the next day - without friends. that was yesterday - it was fun - i'm very attracted to him, we have fun, he seems to really like me too.

(inbetween this, he bumped into his ex & she asked him for a kiss & he refused - he told me this, saying that he rlly rlly likes me - he doesn't usually miss kisses, but he did for me ... yada yada)


okay, so whats my problem?

well - it's just a lil too fast!... he's been calling several times a day, or making me promise to call him (he has funny excuses, so i just call...) ... he talked about cheating - im going on a vacation next week, and he was all worried that i dont have "too much fun" there ... in general, he sounds sweet & rlly into me. i like him too, i think - its just a lil weird when somebody crashed into yr life & tries to take up a lot of room in it so quickly...


so - is this rlly a lil too fast or it sounds fine? the making out hasnt gone too far - like all the clothes stay on...


any comments or advice? thanks in advance =)

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YOU ASK: "so - is this rlly a lil too fast or it sounds fine? the making out hasnt gone too far - like all the clothes stay on..."


Yeppers, it's way too fast. This guy doesn't know much about courting...really too bad. You already know exactly where he's at and there's no challenge whatsoever.


The truly worst thing about this is that with him pushing himself at you constantly, the whole thing will burn out quickly...either you will burn out on the situation...he will...or both of you will. It just won't last the way it's going now.


My advice to you is just enjoy it while you can. There doesn't seem to be much hope in getting him to slow down. Just don't get too attached because this thing is sure to burn out. Don't get me wrong, I'd really love to see this work out for you. But how good is a wonderful gourmet meal if you can eat it in one spoonful.


Right now, the whole thing is fueled solely by chemistry, which not necessarily bad, but for a relationship to evolve properly and endure there has to be a period of getting to know each other in many ways which aren't chemically induced.


When it's over, have this guy come to LoveShack and ask for me. I'll let him know exactly what he's doing wrong.


I do hope I'm wrong. I'd love this to turn out to be the love affair of your life.

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right on, tony ... - he's not keeping it nearly challenging nuff, though he does throw in streaks of challenge... - just stuff like the fact that he has tons of girl-friends and such.


about getting to know each-other: that stage was kind of done when we were still friends ... like we know a loot abt each other as it is ...


u'r totally right that this thing's running on chemistry though ..... but are u sure there's no way i can slow him down?... i could simply somehow tell him it's too fast & weird... or better yet show him... but it's HARD cuz we just cannot get our hands off each other...


one reason he might be rushing is he's taking a 2-month trip later this summer ... it's believable that he rlly does like me and wants to establish the r/s before leaving... or maybe he just wants to try n get me in the sack before leaving :p (good luck to him!)


ugh! this guy is pretty cool...... he's fun... i dont rlly want it to burn out. although why not ... there's always more fun ppl out there... yeah - i'll just go with the flow & see where it leads me with this guy ...


thanks for your comments, tony!

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