samantha010 Posted November 16, 2006 Posted November 16, 2006 In advance i apologize for the length of this thread but please try and help in any way possible. Please and Thank you! I've been dating my current boyfriend for the past 5 months and a half. We started off as friends for a long period of time and eventually we began to have stronger feelings for one another. He is my best friend and i can honestly say that i truly love him and really want a future with him. He tells me he loves me and will do anything for me .... problem is... prior to this boyfriend i was in a year long relationship and he was there for me the entire time when i ever needed anything. For the record, i did not leave my ex for this guy! So back to the point...in the beginning of my current boyfriend and my relationship, things were great! He was affectionate and sweet, caring and very loving. But, after the first month or two we started having arguments. He lives at home with his mother and they argue a lot. He wants to move out but he can't afford to. He screwed up in school and he's waiting for a school to accept him back so that he can upgrade his marks and start college sept. 2007. He is depressed, and i listen to him and he tells me everything that he needs to let out. He has a job but he's really lazy though and even though he stays home all day and works in the evening he doesnt do anything at all! I'm sick of everything. I'm frustrated and i need love and affection and even just a little bit of romance every now and then. He isn't the way he used to be anymore and i've talked to him bout our problems. He realizes it and says he'll do something about it but he hasn't...i gave/give him time....but i don't know how much longer i can take this. I'm feeling a bit depressed! What should i do?!?!?! Thank-you..and sorry once again for the length...all replies are welcome Samantha
norajane Posted November 16, 2006 Posted November 16, 2006 Well, you can't expect your bf to always be there for you all the time, especially when he's going through a rought time and needs YOUR support. Right now, it sounds like he's depressed and having a tough time. If you give him the support he needs, maybe once he's back on his feet, he can be there for you.
Author samantha010 Posted November 16, 2006 Author Posted November 16, 2006 Well, you can't expect your bf to always be there for you all the time, especially when he's going through a rought time and needs YOUR support. Right now, it sounds like he's depressed and having a tough time. If you give him the support he needs, maybe once he's back on his feet, he can be there for you. Point is..i have been supporting him this entire time...before we got into a relationship i knew what he was going through and i was there for him and talked to him and listened to him.
fatty Posted November 18, 2006 Posted November 18, 2006 Hey, It is tough, I can finally get a view from the womans side. I was the same way, depressed and my g/f at the time wanted love and affection. I knew what was wrong - I was the one that was destroying the relationship. The worst thing is, I did nothing to save it. Now here is the reason why. If someone is going through some sort of "tough time" or depression, they have issues that need to be delt with before they can burden themselves with the others such as relationships. He has sort those things out on his own, and you are doing such a grat job bieng there for him but it is just going to HURT you in the end. You have great intentions by bieng there for him but at the end of the day you are probably feeling burnt because lets face it - as much as you wanna be there for him, You, Yourself need some love and affection as well. You can't expect that from him right now, he has some issues to deal with on his own and I would suggest taking a "break" until he can resolve them or else your relationship is only gonna get worse with alot of fighting until you guys hate each other's gut. You can only be there for him so much until he has to take things in his own hands. He might acknowledge the fact what he is doing is wrong but will not realize it. Just take a break from him and don't feel guilty that you are leaving him hanging or anything. Still be his freind but tell him he has somethings to sort out on his own.
Guest Posted November 21, 2006 Posted November 21, 2006 In advance i apologize for the length of this thread but please try and help in any way possible. Please and Thank you! I've been dating my current boyfriend for the past 5 months and a half. We started off as friends for a long period of time and eventually we began to have stronger feelings for one another. He is my best friend and i can honestly say that i truly love him and really want a future with him. He tells me he loves me and will do anything for me .... problem is... prior to this boyfriend i was in a year long relationship and he was there for me the entire time when i ever needed anything. For the record, i did not leave my ex for this guy! So back to the point...in the beginning of my current boyfriend and my relationship, things were great! He was affectionate and sweet, caring and very loving. But, after the first month or two we started having arguments. He lives at home with his mother and they argue a lot. He wants to move out but he can't afford to. He screwed up in school and he's waiting for a school to accept him back so that he can upgrade his marks and start college sept. 2007. He is depressed, and i listen to him and he tells me everything that he needs to let out. He has a job but he's really lazy though and even though he stays home all day and works in the evening he doesnt do anything at all! I'm sick of everything. I'm frustrated and i need love and affection and even just a little bit of romance every now and then. He isn't the way he used to be anymore and i've talked to him bout our problems. He realizes it and says he'll do something about it but he hasn't...i gave/give him time....but i don't know how much longer i can take this. I'm feeling a bit depressed! What should i do?!?!?! Thank-you..and sorry once again for the length...all replies are welcome Samantha samantha i kinda know where you are coming from because that is the same way that me n boyfriend are sometime but the best thing to do is to tell him that you understand where he is coming from and tell him that you are there fora nything but to me when a person is stressing sumtimes they just need there time to be to their selves so that they will be able to just breath because i know when my boyfriens was going through alot of things a t home with his parents sometimes he would have an attitude with me i wouldn't understand becauise i would be like the one that is here all the time listening to your promblems so why am i getting the bad end of the stick so now when anything goes on he knows that i am here and that he can come talk to me after he has cooled off some. and if you are taking care of him and he has own job then that is abog no no because wheter you are a man or a woman when you know that you have some one that will take care of you then you will not want to do for your self. because me and my boyfriend have been together for a year and but havce been talking with out the sexual part for about 2. and it always use to be him taking me out and doing things for me and then after we finally got into a realtionship and i was buying nice things for him and putting gas int the car etc. then when all of his money was gone he would want to ask me so i had to let him know that i didn't like it. it's all about communication. so trying talking it over and it that does not work let it go.
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