forumnewb Posted November 16, 2006 Posted November 16, 2006 Well, before I get off on the topic, let me give you some background. This woman and I first met playing online games. Through a series of few weeks, while playing together, we just got to know each other. The thing that struck me first off is how we were able to communicate; openly and honestly about anything in my life, wether it be odd things to do in bed that other people find wierd, or giggling at the fact we enjoy "odd humor." (i.e seeing that girl in the store with the long pony tails that you want to swing around the top of your head) After a few weeks we talked more and more, going more in depth on who we were, what we did, etc. Let me make note that I am single, and she, is married, lives rather far away, just past the Canadian border while I'm down in California. Also, there age differance is about 10 years. After a few weeks we became well, obsessed with being together, talking about the most intimate of things we would not tell our own family, spouses, or lovers. Since then, we have been so intertwined there is no doubt a connection, hell a love between us. We start and end each other's sentences, we know the other is feeling simply by saying "hi." On some days, I would get dizzy at work and instantly phone her, only to find out something happened in her life at the exact same moment. This is where I knew there was a connection, I don't think it could have been coincidence but it's happened several times, just getting that feeling and knowing something was wrong and calling each other to sooth whatever has happened. At this point I do nothing but think of her, we talk daily, we have found out more in each other in two months than most people would do in two years. We talk about the future, about how we would want it if we were together, our kids, our house, our jobs, everything. Not a day goes by where we don't stay in touch or think about each other all day long. This post is not about wether it's in my heart or head, because despite the impression, there is something there. The problem comes two fold; One, how can I tell my parents about this to hope they can understand, if even possible? I know people tell me "they are your parents they will understand" but I just don't know how to bring this up to them. They know we are friends (from presents given for birthdays etc) but I don't know how to bring it up to more than that. On the second note, I don't know what to do. I want to give the world to this person but I don't want to drive them away with my always present messages of saying "i love you", etc. Part of this problem is I feel I need it, I think. The whole thing there is that I do love her, I love her so incredibly much that it hurts sometimes, and I know she feels the same, and when we talk at times we are both overcome with emotion we can hear each other sobbing. But how much is too much affection? I love her so much I don't want to appear needy or dependive, but I also don't want to slack out and appear that I'm falling out of love. This person is the other half of me that keeps me happy in life, if, without being flamed by the board readers, my soul mate.
onewish Posted November 29, 2006 Posted November 29, 2006 how old are you? and how old is she? Why would you need to discuss this with your parents? Make your own choice.. Is she not happy with her marriage?
Sand&Water Posted December 12, 2006 Posted December 12, 2006 RE: I know it is a little too late but I'd like to input a few words. Forumnewb, IF you still check this board/thread -do write back, or at least take into consideration the information on this board and the full impact of your thoughts/decision. Question: Have you met her in person? and Are there children involved? I understand no one knows this woman as much as you know her, but by the way you describe the situation -everything is running and rolling too quickly. You and her are falling for each faster than normal minus the physical interaction. You should sit down with yourself and think about the 'right thing to do' in your life -not following someone else's 'right thing to do'. IF you do decide to pursue this woman, be prepared for the consequences. Any outsider, would view you as a home 'wrecker'. So, I don't want you do something stupid by sabotaging her marriage at the expense of your love. You should talk to her, with an open heart. Explain to her, that you'd like more from the friendship/relationship/connection and in order for you to move forward you need her word on the matter: whether or not she is willing to leave her husband for a better chance at life and love. She is truly and genuinely happy in her marriage? You can't be stuck in this phaseof your life. How much longer will you keep talking to her? 1 year? 5 years? 10 years? You have a decision to make. You are in control of your life -not your parents. And, must you tell your parents. You're friends with this woman, that's all they need to know for now -until you figure out IF she sincerely wants to be with you. Hope things turn out for the best. Best of Luck to You. Sand&Water
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