Questions about new relationship

[kandygirl]

Hey everybody, this is my first post so bare with me

 

 

Ok this is the deal...A little background info for you guys. Sorry if this turns out to be long...

 

A couple of weeks (Oct. 30 to be exact) I met this great guy. (we're both 26 years old) He lives about 45 minutes away from me and owns a business. He's very smart and level headed. Not like other guys I've dated in the past. We talked for awhile then he asked if I wanted to go out sometime. I said yes, then we exchanged numbers. I gave him mine, and he game me his...

 

3 days later he called and invited me to a get-together his business was having that Saturday. I showed up and hung out with him while he worked, he came back and fourth from working to me and my parents (They're partly the reason we met, they introduced us!)

 

I had to leave early to go somewhere else that I had already planned to go before I met him. He then asked me what I was doing that night when I got finished with my plans. I said nothing. He then invited me back to hang out again after he closed his business.

 

So we ended up back at his business, he and some of his employees were having a bonfire there just hanging out chillin'. He introduced me to all of his friends. Where I live, there are no really true friends to hang around with, it seems like everyone is out to get you. I live in a small town so some of you can relate....

 

Anyway I really felt at home, even though this was my first time meeting all of them. They were really nice and everyone seemed to like me. These people treat everyone like family.

 

So I'm sitting there talking to one of the girls I had just met and he came up and put his arm around me (it was cold LOL) and asked if i was having a good time. I was like, wow this is awesome I think he really likes me!!

 

When I left everyone hugged me and said that they would see me soon. I'm a big hugger, not many people are, so I was pleasantly surprised

 

Since that night, I've seen him just about every day. If I don't see him, he calls just to see how I'm doing at night. I'm not a big phone person, and I don't think he is either which is good. But it's the thought that counts.

 

So on November 9th he kissed me. It was very sweet and not forceful. It was perfect!!! Up until then all we did was hold hands and hug, which I thought he was a very good guy for that. I don't feel like we rushed into anything.

 

 

So now I have some questions...

 

As you can tell, I'm really into this guy. I know it's only been a few weeks but I really would like to do the right thing and try to keep him. I really can't talk to anyone else about these sort of things, that's why I'm coming here

 

First off, if you read up until now, would you think that he conciders us a couple? (I know he's not seeing anyone else, and he's even taken me to meet his parents, who he's very close to.) I'm not going to ask him, I don't want to seem forward.

 

Also, he has his own place, and like I said I live a little ways from him. I go over and spend time with him until pretty late sometimes. He always offers (not pressures me, but he does offer) for me to spend the night there instead of driving back. Would I be making a bad decision if I took him up on his offer? I haven't stayed over yet but he offers everytime I go over. Like I said I don't want to ruin this by making any dumb decisions.

 

One more thing, it's way off and kind of embarassing to ask, but I have to ask...

 

since things are getting serious between us, how long should I wait to sleep with him? I know it's early in the relationship to ask, but it's just for future reference. I don't plan on rushing into that, but I'm sure there will be times when it will come up and I just want to be prepared. Keep in mind that I've only been with a couple of people in my whole like. I don't just sleep with everyone I date. And who knows? It may not even happen. I just wanted to know what everyone elses' time frame was

 

I'm from an old fashioned family, and you know how that is. He comes from a very good family also. My parents really like this guy, (which is great because I'm close to my family) The reason I'm asking all these questions is to get you guys' opinion. It will help me out a lot in the future.

 

Thanks for reading this, I really appreciate it

[norajane]

He's probably starting to think you're a couple since you two are talking every day and he's finally kissed you.

 

I think you can take him up on his offer to say over if he has a spare room. You wouldn't be asking how long to wait before you have sex if you were ready to, so make sure he understands that you'd stay, but you don't mean in the same bed.

 

As to how long to wait, he doesn't seem in a hurry or rush since it took him that long to kiss you. He probably won't push you into it before you are ready, so I don't think you need to worry. It will happen when it feels right naturally.

[kandygirl]

if anyone else has anything....Thanks norajane

[rina_r]

this is my first post so bare with me

 

Bare with you?? No, thanks, I'll pass.

[kandygirl]

what's that supposed to mean?

[Lisa32]

You will know when the time is right. you're like me in that aspect. You don't want to sleep with someone too soon...and you don't want to sleep with him, only to have him run off. You've been seeing him for a while...and you know he likes you. If you two are really in sinc...it's all going to come naturally. I personally would wait for the discussion about "where you two are going in this relationship" Are you exclusive...or not. If not, I would hold off on sleeping with him. If he wants it to be just the two of you....that's when you'll know. There's no need to rush it. He doesn't sound like he is anyway. Just take your time and enjoy getting to know each other.

[rina_r]

what's that supposed to mean?

 

means - you need to learn some spelling rules!

[Bamboot]

“Bear with me,” the standard expression, is a request for forbearance or patience. “Bare with me” would be an invitation to undress.

 

Figure I might clear that up.

[kandygirl]

Thanks Lisa, that made me feel better I'm just trying to do this right, I really want this to work....

 

Oh my goodness...I'm so sorry I spelled that wrong. I didn't mean it like that I guess I do need to learn how to spell....I ment "Bear with me" lol.

[Guest]

Thanks Lisa, that made me feel better I'm just trying to do this right, I really want this to work....

 

Oh my goodness...I'm so sorry I spelled that wrong. I didn't mean it like that I guess I do need to learn how to spell....I ment "Bear with me" lol.

 

I think that taking it slow is the best thing to do. First of all, he's not pressuring you so why even bring it up, secondly, you'll both know when the time is right. And lastly, the longer you wait, the more time you'll both have to really get to know one another and those moments are precious. Enjoy them and enjoy getting to know him. Good luck to you .

[typical]

Are you sure that he and his friends/family are not into the cult? You should ask to make sure. You never know...

 

since things are getting serious between us, how long should I wait to sleep with him?

 

As long as you possibly can and then some. Really draw it out, make it torturous and agonizing for the both of you. That should be fun.

 

 

This:

I personally would wait for the discussion about "where you two are going in this relationship" Are you exclusive...or not. If not, I would hold off on sleeping with him.

 

Sounds like reasonable advise.

[Guest]

Sounds Like Fun - Keep Me Posted - Time To Head Back Home And Grab Some Dinnnnnns -

 

I Have A New House! Woooo Hooo!

 

Happy Holidays All