lovestruckromeo Posted November 12, 2006 Posted November 12, 2006 Hi everybody, Just interested in other peoples opinion! i started dating a new girl and we get on really well... I pay for everything, drinks meals and odd taxi home for her. we have dated for 4 weeks. we decided to go on holiday together for a week. i paid flights, 5* hotel, insurance etc. but i didn't really know weather i should expect her to chip in with food and drink while we are away. Is it wrong to ask her if she is going to take any money with her and share some of our food and drink expenses. i don't expect to split every bill with her, but it would be nice if she helped towards our daily cost as this has cost me a lot of money so far and my budget is a bit tight else i prob wouldn't mind paying it all. should i mention anything to her? like do plan on taking some cash case there is an emergency etc but she is a great girl! as we couldn't get a taxi one night and a buss came, i had given her taxi fare home and the next day she made me dinner and when she invited me over she said i got your taxi money i didn't need as i got the bus... made me feel good! do people think holiday expenses/stuff should be shared ( not flights hotel as i already paid) I dont really want to mention anything as i do earn more than she does but i have had some big expeneses this year and i got a big tax bill in 6 weeks. maybe we should stick to modest places to eat? and i can afford that.
oh_what_am_I_doing Posted November 13, 2006 Posted November 13, 2006 I don't think you're out of line at all. It seems very reasonable to want her to help out financially sometimes. Flights... Five Star Hotel... wow! At the very least she should treat you to a nice meal while you're out, if not several nice meals or all the meals. If you're really strapped for cash now and in your gut you think you will end up paying for the meals, why don't you do what my boyfriend and I did: I bought an electric hot plate and packed a cooler of food. We didn't eat out at all to save money while away in our hotel. It can be very romantic to have a picnic indoors... candlelight, mood music, etc. can be added for extra effect. At the beginning of the relationship it can be awkward. I remember after my boyfriend and I had been together for about two months, he was convinced I needed a new laptop and found me a great deal. We drove out to the store to get it, and he sheepishly asked me if I was planning on paying for it. Of course I was going to pay for it. But then again on the flip side, the other day we were at the store and he said we should get a new board game. I saw a Family Feud interactive DVD game that looked good, so I suggested it. He asked me how we were paying for it, did I want to split it... In that scenario, I think he should pay (and I told him as much!). One question I did have, though, was you said you make more than her. I guess it all depends how much more you make. I make over twice as much as my SO and therefore have paid for all the hotels he and I have stayed in (Chicago, Rochester NY, Put-in-Bay, Cleveland, Cincinnati...). If she's a starving college student and you're an executive, for example, then I think the scale does tip in favor of you paying the majority of the time. If your incomes are more comparable, then paying should be more evenly distributed between the two of you.
Author lovestruckromeo Posted November 13, 2006 Author Posted November 13, 2006 I like that idea about eating in, sounds great! plus its fully self catering with a full kitchen! (breakfast is included) so we can cook romantic, candle lit meals every night, and just go out to eat occasionally, cool !!! thanks for your idea!
Art_Critic Posted November 13, 2006 Posted November 13, 2006 You seem way to focused on money.. You are tracking how many drinks you pay for as well as taxi rides.. If you want her to share in the holiday expenses then just ask her too.. any woman worth her salt won't take advantage of her guy and she will meet you half way.. but make sure you drop the attitude that you pay for everything already.. that kind of attitude is just immature. Sometimes you have to pay to play... Is she worth it ?
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