forgotten1 Posted November 11, 2006 Posted November 11, 2006 My 6 month LDR and I have seen each other every weekend since we got together. We've also talked on the phone at least 3 times/day. Since she went back in school, there has been less and less time for me. She is VERY involved and busy at school, and is head of a few student unions. I know she is very busy. Now she says that school is weighing her down so much that she has alot less time for us. As is stands I haven't seen her in a month, and won't be able to until thanksgiving. We have cut down talking from 3 times/day to about once or twice every 2 days. On top of this she is rekindling relationships with freinds, some of them guys, in order to be more social when she can. Her excuse is that this is her last year at school and she wants to see her freinds as much as possible. I'm trying to not let my insecurities get the best of me, but its hard when every day I feel farther from her. Is this what to expect in this situation, or does this sound crazy? I don't want to be a fool, but I also don't want to get in the way of her studies etc...
Guest Posted November 12, 2006 Posted November 12, 2006 If she can't be bothered to make time for you now then she probably never will. Sorry to be blunt but I am a blunt person. It sounds as though she is clearly not missing you very much because if you miss someone you make time for them.
myflyby Posted November 12, 2006 Posted November 12, 2006 ---i disagree with 'guest': are you even in a LDR??--- I have been doing long distance for over 2 years, and to be honest, talking on the phone three times a day is a bit much, isn't it? Check she isn't feeling like shes hassled for contact. I'm completely im love with my boyfriend, but I'm a terrible long distancer. I deal with stress by ignoring it/blocking it out, so when I miss him I often don't call. Like lately, I'm really stressed out with essays and stuff, so if my boyfriend starts hassling me about "why havent you called me" it just stresses me out further so i ignore him. I know thats terrible, I dont mean to, its just how i deal. When we're together things are totally different. The last year of school is VERY stressful, and she's right for wanting to throw herself into everything. But she should still make some time for you. Me and my boyfriend have always gone by the rule of "as long as it feels *this good* when we're together, we'll keep going".and there isn't long left of being apart now, just til the summer. try really hard to get a weekend with her, soon. see how things are. and talk to her about how you feel. ask her outright if she's moving away from you.
Lauriebell82 Posted November 15, 2006 Posted November 15, 2006 i'd seriously talk to ur gf and find out what she is feeling. it sounds to me like she may be pulling away from u a tad if she isnt making any effort to see u or talk to u. maybe u guys could reach a compromise that would not interfere with her school. maybe my own example will help u out. i am in a ld relationship with my bf of 3 months. i go to graduate school an hour 1/2 away and me and my bf have seen each other every weekend. he is an auditor so he works very long hours during the week and i am busy with school work but we still talk on the phone at night and see each other on the weekend. the point is that even though u are busy if u are really serious about someone and really love them u will do whatever it takes to make it work and make time for them. so i really do think u need to evaluate ur relationship and talk to ur gf about ur feelings.
Guest Posted November 16, 2006 Posted November 16, 2006 Lets see i've been dating my gf for the past 5 years and 3 of them have been a LDR. The same thing happened to me what your going through. She became involved in organizations. S he needs to be part of those organizations it gives her something to do when she can't talk to you. I discoverd for myself that instead of worrying about not being able to talk to her it is easier to just pick up a hobby. But we have a rule to always make sure we talk to each other once a day. So to sum it up my advice is not to worry about this and go do something with your free time. I now play the bass guitar
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