Guest Posted November 10, 2006 Posted November 10, 2006 Ive been dating my current girlfriend for over a year now and we have a very good relationship that shows no signs of stopping any time soon. the only thing is that every month or so i think of her past relationships and get bothered, sometimes a little, sometimes a lot. just the thought of her with someone else makes it so i cant sleep at night. ive tried talking to her about it but she just gets upset, makes excuses, and changes the subject. a lot of the problem is the fact that she is my first real girlfriend where she has had more casual relationships over the years. i dont know why this bothers me because i know i love her and that i should let it go. but its hard and i have a lot of trouble with it sometimes any advice is welcome thanks a lot
ddnnee Posted November 11, 2006 Posted November 11, 2006 i feel the same way. it is probably because she is your first girlfriend and you expect that you would be your girlfriend's first boyfriend. Ideally, a couple will work if they are both new. I find that when one is used and one is new, it will fall apart. Used + Used = okay. just enjoy what you have now and don't expect it to stick around. Since she is use to jumping guy to guy, she won't mind dumping you anytime. Just have fun.
magichands Posted November 11, 2006 Posted November 11, 2006 i dont know why this bothers me because i know i love her and that i should let it go. I like it when people solve their own issues. She's with you now, dude. The past is the past - and you are the one digging it up. The only thing that matters is right here and right now.
funkify Posted November 11, 2006 Posted November 11, 2006 I like it when people solve their own issues. She's with you now, dude. The past is the past - and you are the one digging it up. The only thing that matters is right here and right now. You're right on the ball here, magichands. She is with you, if she wanted someone else she'd be with them instead. Doubts like this can drive you nuts for absolutely no reason. They are unnecessary. Just take each day as it comes, enjoy your relationship
norajane Posted November 11, 2006 Posted November 11, 2006 Why dredge up stuff from way back in her past that had absolutely nothing to do with you? Does that mean you have NO current problems in your relationship now to worry about? Fantastic!!! Next time you flash back to her past relationships, consider the 1,001 things that could be wrong with your relationship now but are not (If you need help imagining what those things that could be wrong are, read this board). Then thank god for having a great relationship, put your arm around her, and sleep peacefully.
ddnnee Posted November 11, 2006 Posted November 11, 2006 kids say the darnest things! = the last 3 posts since this one. the past is as important as the present and future. I agree with you if you are looking for pure fun and sex - then the past isn't important. But would you really want to have a future with a dirty hoe that slept with the whole football team? So ya, forget her past if you are planning to screw her and whatever happens happen. but if you are planning a future with her, then consider her whole history (STD history).
norajane Posted November 11, 2006 Posted November 11, 2006 "Used" and "new" and "dirty hoe"...you sure have a narrow-minded and judgmental view of people. Better hope you never once f*ck up in your life because you won't be able to forgive yourself or live with yourself. Better hope you never fall in love with anyone as judgmental as yourself, or you'll never be forgiven or treated with kindness and compassion.
ddnnee Posted November 11, 2006 Posted November 11, 2006 "Used" and "new" and "dirty hoe"...you sure have a narrow-minded and judgmental view of people. Better hope you never once f*ck up in your life because you won't be able to forgive yourself or live with yourself. Better hope you never fall in love with anyone as judgmental as yourself, or you'll never be forgiven or treated with kindness and compassion. nah, im gonna focus on making $ so i can buy my hoes. 99.99999...% of american chicks are used anyway. but i see you are offended... by what i think and you attack me personally. explain.
magichands Posted November 11, 2006 Posted November 11, 2006 Just take each day as it comes, enjoy your relationship Remember this. I made this mistake, and it's a regret you don't want to be living with - believe me! Just take each day as it comes, enjoy your relationship Worth repeating.
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