jgaz3124 Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 Here is a question for everyone...How long after a major breakup do you usually wait before you start dating again? I know that everyone is different and I also know that there is no set amount of time when it is ok to start dating, I was just curious to the habits of other people when it comes to dating after a breakup.
Meggedy Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 I think it depends on the breakup. I recently broke it off with my ex of 2 years. I was ready to date again after a month or so - but this was only b/c the relationship had been "over" in my mind for a long time before I got the courage to leave. But if it's the other way around - if you're the one who got dumped - then definitely longer. Otherwise you are emotionally vulnerable and not apt to make good decisions.
CurvyGurl Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 My ex and I broke up in November of 2005. I just had my first date since the breakup last week. It was a long, much needed break.
allina Posted November 8, 2006 Posted November 8, 2006 Do you mean just going on dates or seeing someone new exclusively? After ending a year and a half long relationship a couple years ago I was single for a good year but I went on a date here and there. This year my ex of 3 months broke up with me, I thought I cared for a whole week or so, then forgot him, I actually ended up in another relationship a month and a half after the breakup, it's something I've always been against but it happened and I couldn't be happier.
Author jgaz3124 Posted November 8, 2006 Author Posted November 8, 2006 Dating or seeing someone exclusively. I don't know, I guess I asked mainly because I have been broken up with my most current ex for about 3 months know and yes I have dated a guy or two within this time but I find myself really ready to get out in the dating game but at the same time I feel a headache come on when I even think about dating again right now. I seem to be contradicting myself or at least my mind and my heart are and I just am curious what the dating habits of others are after a breakup.
luvtoto Posted November 8, 2006 Posted November 8, 2006 Took me four years to get over my X. We were engaged, though...plus, we were FWB occasionally. I'd pull him back in, he'd pull me back in...it was a viscious cycle. So, I am sure if you do NC, it will be much easier to prepare yourself for a new relationship.
Wantingtogetitright Posted November 8, 2006 Posted November 8, 2006 best guideline I can give you is simply how you feel. There is no set in stone thing. I didn't see anyone for a little over 4 years after my last realtionship broke up - 6 years together and I emigrated to be with him. I have never been into the "dating scene". ie I don't date around, it is one at a time to see if there is any potential for a future. If you still have pangs for your ex and harbour any hopes of getting back together then you are not ready for the next person, unfair on them if you are not ready to give your whole self. Only you can decide this based on how you feel.
reservoirdog1 Posted November 8, 2006 Posted November 8, 2006 My cheating XW and I separated November 1, 2003. She'd confessed her serial adultery to me three months earlier, and she'd called off the short-lived attempt at reconciliation a month earlier. We'd been married for seven years, together for 11. My first date was that very night, November 1, not to mention my first post-marital sexual encounter. I dated fairly heavily after that. Was it the best idea? Yes and no. I definitely wasn't emotionally ready to have a relationship with somebody new. But I still believe that getting into dating right away, in my circumstances, was exactly what I needed. Thanks to XW's revelations, my self-confidence and self-esteem had been dealt a major body blow. Getting back on my feet in terms of dating helped a lot.
Guest Posted November 9, 2006 Posted November 9, 2006 My ex and I broke up this past April, after being together for over 5 years. I hadn't planned on dating or being in a relationship for a long time, because I was an emotional wreck and totally heartbroken. Then within the past few months I started spending more time with a guy I had been friends with for about 3 years, and about a month ago we became official, so I had a 6 month break in between. I spent the 6 months rebuilding myself and my life. The important thing I realized was that you must be happy with yourself and your life before you can be happy with someone else. I never knew what being content with myself felt like, and I think that was the key in what made me ready to be with someone again.
Author jgaz3124 Posted November 9, 2006 Author Posted November 9, 2006 My ex and I broke up this past April, after being together for over 5 years. I hadn't planned on dating or being in a relationship for a long time, because I was an emotional wreck and totally heartbroken. Then within the past few months I started spending more time with a guy I had been friends with for about 3 years, and about a month ago we became official, so I had a 6 month break in between. I spent the 6 months rebuilding myself and my life. The important thing I realized was that you must be happy with yourself and your life before you can be happy with someone else. I never knew what being content with myself felt like, and I think that was the key in what made me ready to be with someone again. I couldn't agree with you more. I think that sometimes I just need space to be with me more and learn more about myself and become comfortable with myself. I have so many vocies in my head and in my heart telling me that I am ready but also telling me that I am not ready and I guess I am just so confused. So I am thinking that maybe I should just be alone for awhile longer and I need to realize that is not the worst thing in the world to be single, in fact I hate to admit this but for the first time in my life, I kinda like being single. I just need time to figure this all out I guess.
TattooedPrincess Posted November 10, 2006 Posted November 10, 2006 Usually I give myself 6 to 8 weeks before ever going back into dating after breaking up with someone I have been with for a year or two.
Lovlygrl13 Posted November 10, 2006 Posted November 10, 2006 Here is a question for everyone...How long after a major breakup do you usually wait before you start dating again? I know that everyone is different and I also know that there is no set amount of time when it is ok to start dating, I was just curious to the habits of other people when it comes to dating after a breakup. MY BEST FRIEND it did not take that long because she went back out with her ex 3times
ddnnee Posted November 11, 2006 Posted November 11, 2006 Used (highly experienced daters) usually rebound in 1 month. After a breakup, they will be back in action after a month or so. people who lost their first (girls): 6 months to a year rebound. people who lost their first (guys): 1 year to 18 months. (1) dating people who are still rebounding is bad since they are needy and want to use you as a quick replacement for their lost one. I myself always ask when was the last relationship. I reject all rebounders to be on the safe side. (1) cited from "dating for dummies"
Author jgaz3124 Posted November 11, 2006 Author Posted November 11, 2006 Used (highly experienced daters) usually rebound in 1 month. After a breakup, they will be back in action after a month or so. people who lost their first (girls): 6 months to a year rebound. people who lost their first (guys): 1 year to 18 months. (1) dating people who are still rebounding is bad since they are needy and want to use you as a quick replacement for their lost one. I myself always ask when was the last relationship. I reject all rebounders to be on the safe side. (1) cited from "dating for dummies" I am curious to know when you ask someone when their last relationship was how long before it ended do you judge if they are a rebound?
IpAncA Posted November 11, 2006 Posted November 11, 2006 I don't really want to be a rebound person myself but if it's been a while for the other person then it's usually not a problem for me to date him. I'm just more aware that it probably won't work but no harm in having some fun in the mean time. I think tt depends on a lot of things like after a major break up like who broke up with who, why, and how long you've been together. My longest one was about a couple of years but that was because I was in college so I was distracted with that for a while.
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