Chibaby Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 My best friend is wonderful, however, there is a side of her that I sometimes clash with. For instance, she tends to be quite emotional and hasty, often making snap decisions about friendships when she gets upset. She has been known to "cut people off" if they look at her the wrong way. I have been friends with her over 12 years, and I have only had one incident when she has gotten angry with me, and for the past few years, we have been very close and hang out on a regular basis. Lately she seems to be ignoring me. Two months ago, I introduced her to my former co-worker Katie, she only calls and hangs with "Katie". Often times they do not even invite me out, and they have only known each other for 2 months at the most and they do NOT work together!! I don't even know Katie very well to be honest. This part is even stranger...They even planned an vacation together across the country without me!! Personally, I wouldn't feel comfortable planning a vacation with someone I've known for only 2 months. (They are both very hetro if you were wondering) I think my best friend is uncomfortable with my fiance, and sometimes resents the fact that I am with him. She no longer calls me back. I am hesitant to confront her, because confrontation can sometime lead to more than you bargain for with this girl. My other friends agree that this is strange behavior. To be honest, I feel slightly jealous of Katie, but I think in this case she is the innocent bystander. My fiance thinks my best friend just wants someone single to hang out with, and his theory is that everytime she meets someone new, she autotmatically has a new "best friend/sidekick," doens't need me cause she has someone to party and be single with, and I'm always there to fall back on. I don't want to agree with this, but he does have a point. I wonder if anyone else has been in this situation, and I'd like some advice about how to handle it. My fiance thinks she is a selfish person, and to just ignore it and go forth with my own life (school, work etc.) is the best way to go. I agree because confrontation with her can be like walking through a minefield, but at the same time it bothers me and I want to know what is going on. I think it's just my turn to go through the "I don't like you" phase. What are your opinions?
norajane Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 I think your fiance probably has it right. She could also be jealous that you're getting married and afraid she's going to "lose" your friendship/time, etc., so is shoring up her other friendships to take your place after you're married. That vacation is a sign of that - she probably figures once you're married, you won't want to go on vacations with her anymore. You don't have to be confrontational. For example, if you want to go on the vacation, just say something like 'wow, sounds like a great vacation...I'd love to go with you!' and make sure you mention you wouldn't be bringing your fiance.
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