Angel Posted November 6, 2006 Posted November 6, 2006 My husband told me last night (after a little too much to drink) that the night we fell "in love", he was checking out a woman's nipples. We had always spoken about that night in the most romantic way and now he tells me that! I wouldn't have continued to see him had I noticed. I am sooooooo friggin pissed off. We have been married for two years. I have never noticed him looking at women----we dated for 2 years prior to being married. I always thought I could trust him. When I met him I told him that I was looking for a man with values. He has always told me that he only had eyes for me. I am disappointed and extremely hurt. I don't know if he can undo this damage. Need advice,
Moose Posted November 6, 2006 Posted November 6, 2006 Ummmm.....you're husband is human. I know it'll be hard to accept at first, but husbands and wives check out other people too, even us, "honest to goodness" ones..... I know how you feel, been there, and made it through, I just had to accept that my wife has really good taste.......
kjl933 Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 Yeah, he was human. We all are. Tell me if Fabio walked by with a tight muscle shirt that you would not check him out? You are blowing this up into something that it does not need to be. Just know that he did pick you and you have 4 happy years together. PS--if it was the night you "fell in love" I am assuming that you were both still single. Not that my advice would be different if you were married, but being single adds another element to it as well.
IpAncA Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 Yeah he's only human. Lot of people do that. Sometimes you just can't help it and I'm guilty of it and so is my husband. I caught him one time and I was like "You didn't think those were real did you" and he was like " don't know didn't see them." Yeah right how could you not. Even I did. Don't take it personal because its not.
Wantingtogetitright Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 IpAncA - I loved your response to your husband! I will definitely use it in future. I don't really get bothered by my partner watching a pair of breasts walk by, we go to the football together and I drool over some of the players upper arms! It is all good appreciation of the human body. As for your hubby Angel, please don't do anything to upset your marriage over something like this. Love him for having the sense to choose you. Make a joke out of it or soemthing, whatever will help you deal with it. It may seem major to you right now but it really is nothing. Hell I was watching "How Not To Decorate" last night and one of the female presenters was on very high beam that I couldn't help but watch them. Even pointed it out to my partner by saying check out his chick, it is either freezing in that house or she is very excited by the wallpaper!!
Severed_Wasp Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 I agree that in ordinary, day-to-day events, checking out somebody else is admittedly very human and normal. But to come out and just say that about an obviously very special night shows a lack of tact (and perhaps sobriety). I'd be livid too, but in the end you just have to decide if you're going to get past that remark or allow it to eat at your insides. After your anger subsides, I'd have a little chat with him about it, communicate your emotions, and then let it go.
Jersey Shortie Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 One time at the zoo one monkey was playing with another monkey's nipples. I sure noticed that.
Author Angel Posted November 7, 2006 Author Posted November 7, 2006 Thanx so much for all your very wise responses. They calmed me down quite a bit. When I got home I had a dozen beautiful flowers waiting for me. He called me from work and apologized and told me he was quite hammered. I forgave him.
Wantingtogetitright Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 now ask for the champagne and chocolates to go with the flowers, get a nice bath run, a full body massage and ....................... nah seriously - great news, shows how aware he is of your feelings and what it meant to you.
whichwayisup Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 The problem is, he told you...That bit of info should have been kept quiet on his behalf...What an idiot!! Don't take it out of context, k. He loves you, he's married to you! (after a little too much to drink) There ya go........Big mistake and I'm betting he regrets opening his mouth!
Author Angel Posted November 7, 2006 Author Posted November 7, 2006 You guys are the greatest! And he does love me. The nipples at the zoo made me lol.
IpAncA Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 IpAncA - I loved your response to your husband! I will definitely use it in future. I don't really get bothered by my partner watching a pair of breasts walk by, we go to the football together and I drool over some of the players upper arms! It is all good appreciation of the human body. You like that huh . I can play the game too.
Flyin in Clouds Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 M... he was checking out a woman's nipples. I am disappointed and extremely hurt. I don't know if he can undo this damage. Need advice, He's married, he isn't dead.... Guys look. Look at it this way. If he wasn't attracted to women he wouldn't be attracted to you. And of all the women out there he could have had, he figured you were the absolute best for him. When he made that decision he took the total package. All of you. But ff you expect him to look only at you, and never notice any other woman, you're nuts.
rainfall Posted November 8, 2006 Posted November 8, 2006 Yeah, he was human. We all are. Tell me if Fabio walked by with a tight muscle shirt that you would not check him out? Women actually find him attractive.
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