Sum Posted November 4, 2006 Posted November 4, 2006 I met a girl about a year ago and we hit it off then suddenly around august she broke it off because she said that she had feelings for another person and basically left me to die in pain and agony. Then during sept ember she said that she made a big mistake and wanted me back but i said no because what she did was horrible. And during that time, she said she will wait for me until I'm ready. Now two months later, my feelings towards came back and for some odd reason i want to be with her again and when i asked her she said no. Now I'm being stuck at aw and i do not know what to do about this situation I'm in. I'm depressed most of the time, i can't sleep or do anything correctly now. Please, can someone offer me advice on what to do to cope with this so i can finally let go or forget about her all together
Violet87 Posted November 5, 2006 Posted November 5, 2006 Take time for yourself now. Don't contact her or try to reach her. Take time to heal. Although it may not feel that way now, you will eventually heal enough to move on and meet another girl someday. In the meantime, reflect on the relationship. Afterwards talk to friends and emerge yourself in activities/hobbies, so you can get your mind off her. It won't be easy and might even take some time to heal over the relationship but you'll be glad you did so in the end.
Sum Posted November 5, 2006 Posted November 5, 2006 Take time for yourself now. Don't contact her or try to reach her. Take time to heal. Although it may not feel that way now, you will eventually heal enough to move on and meet another girl someday. In the meantime, reflect on the relationship. Afterwards talk to friends and emerge yourself in activities/hobbies, so you can get your mind off her. It won't be easy and might even take some time to heal over the relationship but you'll be glad you did so in the end. I'm try so hard. But for some reason i wake up thinking about her. I always feel ****ty. I really don't know what to do anymore. I've been talking to a lot of my friends and they are saying all the right thing but for some reason I'm deaf in hearing what they are saying.
ralph124c Posted November 5, 2006 Posted November 5, 2006 Read the 'best coping mechanisms' thread -- there is a lot of really good stuff on there. I know that feelining in the morning well. It does pass, but it takes a while and it sucks. It sounds llike she doesn't really know what she wants -- if she really thinks she made a mistake the first time, she'd understand why you were wary of getting back with her. YOu can't change what she thinks or does, all you can do is take care of yourself.
sum Posted November 6, 2006 Posted November 6, 2006 Read the 'best coping mechanisms' thread -- there is a lot of really good stuff on there. I know that feelining in the morning well. It does pass, but it takes a while and it sucks. It sounds llike she doesn't really know what she wants -- if she really thinks she made a mistake the first time, she'd understand why you were wary of getting back with her. YOu can't change what she thinks or does, all you can do is take care of yourself. Yes, you are right. I'm not even sure why I even want to get back with her. She did a lot of horrible things to me and my friend keeps saying the same thing because they know how underhanded she is but for some reason she is all I can think about. I know I should try to keep myself busy and all so I can go back to NC about her but I'm a college student that only study, school and work. Thinking about her is making me stressed out.
JCD Posted November 7, 2006 Posted November 7, 2006 When you're in love you tend to forgive the negatives of the other person. You will have to go thru agony, pain and turmoil for you to get over her. Time heals. You know what? Love shouldn't be this complicated. If it is it means that it never meant to be. It's just a mismatch, maybe you're more mature than her and need someone on the same level as you.
Sum Posted November 8, 2006 Posted November 8, 2006 I understand, Thanks for the advice. I was wondering if i should ask for my stuff back. The items i loan her.. would that make feel better or just feel as worst as i am right now?
JCD Posted November 9, 2006 Posted November 9, 2006 If you don't want her anymore then I think you should take the items back as then you're not left wondering if she's thinking about you when she looks at those items. That way you have a clean break and can move on. Maybe you should post pone this decision until you are sure of yourself. You're going thru a process, feeling hurt, numb, angry, in contempt, hurt and angry again, etc. Wait until you're back to contempt and then decide.
Sum Posted November 10, 2006 Posted November 10, 2006 If you don't want her anymore then I think you should take the items back as then you're not left wondering if she's thinking about you when she looks at those items. That way you have a clean break and can move on. Maybe you should post pone this decision until you are sure of yourself. You're going thru a process, feeling hurt, numb, angry, in contempt, hurt and angry again, etc. Wait until you're back to contempt and then decide. Thanks a lot JCD. Really appreciate all the advice you and LS given me. I'll try to discover myself once again and try to relax before i make any irrational moves.
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