jessicajustasking Posted November 3, 2006 Posted November 3, 2006 I have two questions- not being a mom myself and never having dating anyone with kids this is a new experience! My boyfriend has a 7 year old son from a previous relationship. THey were never married and the mom rarely sees the boy. She seems to "disapear" and have no contact with him for months at a time. My boyfriend recently took her to court to gain full custody and she didn't even show up for the custody hearing! Instead they called her on the phone and she admitted she only saw her son about 3 times a year! She wasn't even sure how old he is! He does have may female figures in his life- his grandmother lives next door and his aunt lives with him and my boyfriend. I've been dating my boyfriend for a little over a year and seem to be close to his son. It was a little rocky at first but as soon as the boy realized I wasn't going to take his dad away from him he accepted me into his life. NOw I am wondering if I"ve let him become too close to me? I think he thinks of me as a big playmate because I will do kids stuff with him (jump on his trampoline, play hide and seek, and get into water battles with him.) My boyfriend and I include him in a lot of activities- going out to eat, bike riding, going to the park, going swimming etc) he is normally always with us. He always wants to snuggle with me when we are watching cartoons, he will lay against me and hug me, when I have to say good bye (we don't live together) he gives me a big hug and say "I love you" to me. My boyfriend says he doesn't say that to anyone else, not his grandma, not his aunt, just his dad and me. He went thru a phase where he was constanlty asking his dad why he didnt have a mommy and dad who lived together like all the other kids at school. when i take him places without his dad when I go to drop him off at home he wants to come home with ME. I took him to an amusement park and when i got back to his house, he wouldn't leave my side. He was hugging me and wrapping his arms aroudn me and crying that he didnt' want me to leave. He does get to see his mother more regularly now- every ohter weekend if she shows up so I'm not wanting to be a mother figure to him even though in actions I am in a way- I take him out places, help him with homework, buy him school clothes, play games with him. I'm invovled in a big part of his life except I have nothing to do with discipline. That is up to my boyfriend. I don't know that I will ever marry my boyfriend- we haven't talked about it or thought that far ahead. So I feel that maybe I am letting his son get too close to me. Is this regular behavior for a child of a single parent whose dad is dating?
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