Confuggled_one Posted November 3, 2006 Posted November 3, 2006 Hey Guys, If you have been reading my previous threads, you have knowledge about my situation. Well, the game is on. The EX. is BACK. Two days ago, my ex was begging my friend to see me.. she was bawling and everything and i felt extremely bad. I wanted to see her because I missed her.. and i wont deny that. When she saw me all she could do is cry and shake. I felt so bad for her that i just kept holding her telling her everything is okay. We sat there for 30 mins while during that time she was crying. I kept holding... but i had to run, so i invited her to the mall with my best friend. Things were going okay, but i noticed she was kind of quiet. she told me later it was cause she was mad at herself. She was mad at the fact that she could not take girls liking me... and wanting to do things more than friends would do. That's besides the point.. but i noticed she was trying to keep her distance. But at one point.. she confessed to me everything she has done during the NC period. That's when it hit me and got me extremely mad. She told me that she had been making out with this guy and reassured me that he was only a rebound. They made out, and he got her semi-naked.. meaning she was in her jeans and bra. They made out for 30mins-1hour and that was for atleast 3 times. I got extremely mad, so i ran off.. wanting some time to cool off. She came running after me, telling me she was sorry. She was crying, too.. but i cut it short because i didnt want to hear anything at that moment in time.. i did not blow up at her what-so-ever. i kept my cool and just went to meet up with my best friend. After that, all three of us went to catch a movie.. and after the movie i took my best friend home.. and i was left with my ex. She made out with me and told me she was extremely sorry. she didnt know what she was doing and she was confused and needed some comfort. I of course was sad.. but i didnt realy say anything. and she needed to go home.. so i let her go. the next day, we meet up again. she wanted to go shopping and asked me to go with her. So we shop, have a nice day.. but at one point we were on my car again.. she wanted to kiss me but those images of her and her rebound just pop up in my head. I was sad, but i did not yell, curse, or anything emotionally unstable to her. I just sat there, wanting some time to cool down.. but she just kept coming at me.. giving me kisses and telling me she was sorry. At one point, she cried while she was kissing me and told me that she will never do it agian. she told me she loved me and no one else can compare to me. she said she wants to prove to me that she will not do this again during her college career.. and she will be with me after college if we both 'change'. This just sounded like a bull**** reason to keep me around and watch after her.. and use me as a safety net. I dont know, but sometimes she seems so sincere. She told me she was afraid of me lying to her again (I lied because she would never let me hang out with my friends.. and she caused me so much stress so i had to talk to my friends about it.. she thought that was talking ****), her being jealous of me because i was rather social, and for me being better at her at school. But she keeps telling me she loves me.. and tomorrow she wants me meet me up and chill with me before her party. i know what she is going to do... I dont know whether or not i should forgive her.. let her in my life again as a friend.. I am sure if i have done the same and took ONE of the many oppurtunities i had with girls.. she would have ignored me for the rest of my life. I dont know what to do.. and I really need some input thoughts. I am rather frustrated so some parts of my story might not make sense. thanks guys.. I sitll love her. but I do not feel the same anymore. I feel betrayed because she did things with someone else.. when she told me she wouldnt have another relationship till after she was done with college. so .... any advice will help. thanks guys.
Ssheena Posted November 3, 2006 Posted November 3, 2006 "If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you. If that person doesn't walk away, you will surely endure many years of suffering with him or her. Walking away may hurt for a while, but your heart will eventually heal. Then you can choose what you really want." Does that look familiar? Is she treating you with love and respect? Is she throwing a hissy fit because you set boundaries and were firm with them and she wants to know she still can get you? Is being with her what you really want? Go back and read all the stuff you posted about how she treated you and the drama you went through with her. Go back and read how strong and how you were coping with it all. Good luck with this. I wouldn't be able to trust the person if it were me and that would make the relationship NOT work.
Author Confuggled_one Posted November 3, 2006 Author Posted November 3, 2006 "If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you. If that person doesn't walk away, you will surely endure many years of suffering with him or her. Walking away may hurt for a while, but your heart will eventually heal. Then you can choose what you really want." Does that look familiar? Is she treating you with love and respect? Is she throwing a hissy fit because you set boundaries and were firm with them and she wants to know she still can get you? Is being with her what you really want? Go back and read all the stuff you posted about how she treated you and the drama you went through with her. Go back and read how strong and how you were coping with it all. Good luck with this. I wouldn't be able to trust the person if it were me and that would make the relationship NOT work. Ssheena: THANKS. you are absolutely RIGHT. I love LS.
Kamille Posted November 3, 2006 Posted November 3, 2006 There's a lot of ambiguity in your post, and I'm thinking this is because if you two are ever meant to be together, this is not the right time. She's obviously not in a good space about the whole thing and, sweetie, neither are you. I'm sure you didn't originally fall in love with her because she cried all the time! And please please please stop kissing her! Why don't you have a leap a faith. You know how they say if it's meant to be, it will happen? You know what, I really believe that. Part of it is learning when to let go. If you two are meant to be together somewhere down the line, it will happen. Now just doesn't seem like the right time.
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