PoshPrincess Posted October 31, 2006 Posted October 31, 2006 I did initially post this question on someone else's thread but thought maybe best to start my own....... How long do you do NC for? I haven't had any contact with my ex for three weeks although he has tried calling me twice, that I know of, and I have ignored him (the second time he left a message). When do I stop ignoring him and make that casual contact? Not sure that it's the right time yet, especially as we have done NC a few times before (for no more than three weeks before one of us gave in!) Any advice would be much appreciated!
freckles3131 Posted October 31, 2006 Posted October 31, 2006 Not sure that it's the right time yet, especially as we have done NC a few times before (for no more than three weeks before one of us gave in! If you're "not sure that the time is right" then it's too soon.......I think you should do what you haven't done before otherwise you will fall back into the same old routine/vicious cycle. You are trying to "make a point" here! That you value yourself, love yourself, respect yourself and are not going to be that "same old girl" that caves in! Keep on, keepin' on! Ignore.....you need to have more time under your belt or he won't "miss you" or SEE that you are in a good place.
Guest Posted October 31, 2006 Posted October 31, 2006 I am sort of going through the same scenario. I maintained NC for about 2 weeks and he called me Saturday morning and them Monday morning. Its now Tuesday evening. I think the next time he called I will pick it up. I dont think he wants to get together, but when we broke up I was pretty bad, so i think he just wants to see how I am doing. Or maybe not, i dont know thats why i think its time I talk to him and figure it out. Part of me thinks that if i dont pick it up he will never call me again.
Author PoshPrincess Posted November 3, 2006 Author Posted November 3, 2006 I am sort of going through the same scenario. I maintained NC for about 2 weeks and he called me Saturday morning and them Monday morning. Its now Tuesday evening. I think the next time he called I will pick it up. I dont think he wants to get together, but when we broke up I was pretty bad, so i think he just wants to see how I am doing. Or maybe not, i dont know thats why i think its time I talk to him and figure it out. Part of me thinks that if i dont pick it up he will never call me again. Thanks guys, I KNOW the time isn't right at the mo Freckles. I know it will still mess with my head big time, so I am gonna wait a while longer. Guest, it's so hard huh? I was pretty bad last time my ex spoke to me. I got really upset over the phone which I hated doing as my strength and independence was one of the reasons he fell in love with me and it made me feel like I'd been faking it all that time. Of course, we all have our weaknesses and unfortunately he was mine. I know what you mean about not picking up the phone and then worrying it will be the last you hear from them. V scary. I never told my ex I didn't want contact with him. He suggested it would be best not to stay in touch as it was doing my head in everytme we spoke but I told him that I was fine and more than happy to be friends which I guess is why he's been phoning. I feel like a bitch now for not being honest with him but even one little text explaining how I feel will set everything off again. I will sit there waiting for his reply and will get myself more worked up if I don't hear anything. He phoned Saturday to thank me as he had taken his son to a show the previous night that I'd bought him tickets for (last Xmas). I feel rude not to have least texted him to say, "Thanks for your message, glad you had a good time!" but I physically can't do it. I think I just have to let sleeping dogs lie - for now. Oh, and I've got a date with a new man next weekend. Not expecting anything out of it - I can't when I have so many feelings for someone else - but at least it will take my mind off things temporarily.
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