kdark Posted October 30, 2006 Posted October 30, 2006 I am twenty years old. I am 6' 2''. I am 195 ponuds. I work out and run. I am very good looking/cute. (This is not a boast, I have been told this by many good looking girls my age.) I am very nice and considerate. I have a good job and a go to a good college. I know about 20 girls that I can have a decent conversation with, enjoy talking to them, and I can make them laugh. None of these girls have given me a signal that I can read that tells me they are interested in anything more than just talking. They have never hinted at wanting to hang out outside of work/school. I can never get past the beginning part of the conversation, it's like I'm constantly just spouting general conversation things, and can never take it to the next level. I have two somewhat masochistic problems. My first problem: Girls that I am truly interested in and want to start a relationship with, I am afraid to talk to. I always get this feeling that the girls isn't really into me at all, and that if I try to take it to the next level by asking her to go eat or to the movies, she will think I am a nut case and will never want to speak to me again. Therefore, I am afraid to ask girls on dates. I also have another problem: Girls who show a lot of interest/attraction to me I am not attracted to. All my teen/young adult life, if a girl let on that she wanted to have sex/make out, I would start avoiding her. In college, it got to the point where I wouldn't go to parties because there were girls there who I knew wanted to make out/have sex with me, so I wouldn't go. So I have two problems, I am afraid to ask out girls that I truly like, and all the girls who ask me out, I am not attracted to. My first girlfriend hardened me to girls who are attracted to me, because all I was to her was a trophy who looked good to the parents because I treated her so well, and she would brag to all her friends about how she has a hot boyfriend (I walked in on her doing it). And the bragging wasn't in a good way, she referred to having me wrapped around her fingers. I treated her like gold, and she never did anything to me except cheat on me. My second girlfriend was too short to mention, more of a friends that should have never been thing. My third and last girlfriend was a girl who got around both of my fears because she comepletely spelled it out ot me that I was supposed to ask her out on a date. "I was going to go to the movies with my friends, but they all ditched me, now I have nothing to do tonight..." We dated for almost a year, but I broke it off when she tried to get too close to me (A very long story that I will get into in another thread). Is there anything I can do to get around my fears, other than waiting for a girl to spell it out for me like my last girlfriend?
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