scipio Posted October 29, 2006 Posted October 29, 2006 For the past 2 years,..I can't tell you how many times I've thought about this girl. Its probably unhealthy. Anyway,..I see her every once in a while,...but I can't help but think about whether she ever thinks about me,..or whether she still may still have some feelings for me. Every time I run into her,...I find myself analyzing her every word/move afterwards to get some inkling. This is frustrating because after 2 years I don't want to think about her even once a week,...let alone once a day. Sometimes I wish that we were atleast friends since that would be better than nothing (Which theoretically as possible since she still thinks higly of me just by how she treats me). Anyway,.,...any suggestions? Besides talking to a specialist, lol.
sscott0059 Posted October 29, 2006 Posted October 29, 2006 Hi Scipio, Wow! It's kinda scary how much that sounds like my own situation lol. After reading some background with you and this girl, I found a quote you put in a previous thread: "That being said, things ended kinda abruptly,..and what EATS ME UP inside is i have this need to know how she feels and if she stills thinks about me it all. You know, if i knew that she still had feelings for me,..believe it or not I could walk away from all this with a smile. Add to that the fact that I see her every once in a while for a split second, and that just puts salt on a healing wound." What caught my attention was when you said that things ended kind of abruptly. See, I think a lack of closure is the culprit for why I still think about my ex and wonder how she feels. Perhaps that is the case for you too? Maybe the proper closure would help you move forward/ I wish I could offer advice to remedy this situation but rest assured, you're not alone
Author scipio Posted October 29, 2006 Author Posted October 29, 2006 Hi Scipio, Wow! It's kinda scary how much that sounds like my own situation lol. After reading some background with you and this girl, I found a quote you put in a previous thread: "That being said, things ended kinda abruptly,..and what EATS ME UP inside is i have this need to know how she feels and if she stills thinks about me it all. You know, if i knew that she still had feelings for me,..believe it or not I could walk away from all this with a smile. Add to that the fact that I see her every once in a while for a split second, and that just puts salt on a healing wound." What caught my attention was when you said that things ended kind of abruptly. See, I think a lack of closure is the culprit for why I still think about my ex and wonder how she feels. Perhaps that is the case for you too? Maybe the proper closure would help you move forward/ I wish I could offer advice to remedy this situation but rest assured, you're not alone Thanks for the reply! Hey,..if you're feeling the same way,..I feel for you bro. Hang in there. I think closure may be the issue,...but at the same time I think that at some point it must be put in the past. I mean 2 years? Sometimes I think I'm so in love with this girl,...perhaps i will never get over it. Other times I think that it just may be my mind playing tricks on me,..amplyfing the loneless I felt from being alone as opposed to being with someone so lively. I don't know. All said and done though,...I don't see how I could get closure at this point. I mean my heart rate increases everytime I see her,...I think i may possibly end up hurting myself more,..I think thats what scares me. But I just want to be beyond this,...cause however much i love her,..thats not worth the pain this is causing. I don't think i deserve that. So how have you been handling it Scott? If I may ask,..whats your story?
sscott0059 Posted October 30, 2006 Posted October 30, 2006 Well, her and I were in a relationship for about a year, which we broke up about six months ago. I think we had a good relationship; we never had any major arguments and always enjoyed spending time together. When we were together Christmas of last year, I worked up the courage to tell her that I loved her and that I was happy that we were together and other things etc. etc. I felt good that I was able to express my feelings toward her, even though she didn't at that time tell me that she loved me as well. But that was ok...it's about sharing your feelings, not reciprocity. Besides, I think I could always tell by her actions of how she felt. I was always more opne about feelings than she was anyway. After that, we continued in our relationship (of course, things changed since I told her how I felt...it definalty brought us closer together now that she knew I was serious). Then about May of this year, she suddenly drops out of my life...her phone becomes disconneted, no way to IM. So I see her at her house and she feeds me some BS about it being my fault that we needed to break up and I wasn't doing enough to further the relationship (this was not true...now that I think back, there were many times that I was putting most of the effort in). After that, I decided to go no contact and try to get over her and I have made a little progress, but not as much as I had hoped. If this sounds confusing, that's because the path our relationship took was confusing. I mean, it had it's hot/cold periods, there were many times she seemed apathetic about us being together. But I suppose I always thought those were normal problems in any relationship...boy did I have blinders on lol. But, I don't know, I'm always hearing from family and friends that she's always askingabout me and I just try to move on and take it one day at a time. I wanna say that I have dated other women since we broke up when I felt that I had moved on, but so far, I just can't move past her memory. I hope someday I'll be able to see another woman as I see her...as someone that I am meant to be with. So far, that is yet to happen.
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