so lost Posted October 29, 2006 Posted October 29, 2006 was with this man for over 4 years and he was my first bf ever and the only person i have been with....even a kiss. at the moment i am 22 and he is 30. at two years into our relationship he cheated on me and i didnt wana give him a second chance. he wouldnt take no for an answer and wouldnt leave me alone claiming his undying love and how sorry he was. i gave him a second chance and things were good. we did fight a bit. we were together for over four years and 8 months ago he left me. at first he wouldnt leave me alone following me and giving me mixed msgs we would get back together. i kept bugging him in the last 2 weeks to give us a second chance. he turned around and said he dont love me anymore. he dont want to have any contact with me. he told me im his angel and that no one will ever know him or love him like me. why give that up is what i dont understand. he said he will never forget me.one week he told me of course he has feelings for me and then a week later he said he doesnt after saying he is going to cut contact he was online after he said he was blocking me but he couldnt see me coz i blocked him. then the next day his cousin was trying to call but i didnt answer coz i thought m,aybe she wanted to say to leave him alone or something. he has turned off his phone. since he said he was cutting contact i have not contacted him in any way. i have tryed that and when i had no contact with him at all he then turns up and follows me. i sent him a fruit basket and said i dont want things to end badly and good luck with life and take care. he rang my sister and said that he is cutting all contact with us and changing his phone number. at first he told me hes not sure of what he wants. one week he told me that he had feelings for me and i was in his heart but it wasnt strong enough to do anything about it. then a week later just like that he turns around and says to me he dont love me anymore. im not sure what to do. maybe it is just over. he told me if i be with someone else that it is 100% over between us.but it is ok for him to turn up where i am and contact me and then when i did it to him it wasnt ok, and he got angry, double standards.can his feelings just change like that? when we were together he was wearing my ring with my initials on it that my dad gave me. he told me it is speacial to him and he will always wear it (he said that when we were together). i told him i would like it back coz my dad gave it to me. he told me he would send it in the mail. but it has been a month and i dont think im getting it back. why would he need to hold onto my ring if he doesnt aparently have feelings for me?? its confusing me we have n=been over for over 8months now. do you think he may change his mind coz he has no contact with me? do u think he still has feelings for me? i dont understand how he can love me so much one day and then not then next. he told me even if we arent together i am still his angel and no one will ever know him or love him like i did...why say that
whir Posted October 29, 2006 Posted October 29, 2006 Read the entire first page of this thread http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t96092/ The title is compilation of best advices on how to win som1 bck
vanButterfly Posted October 29, 2006 Posted October 29, 2006 Be very very careful about no contact... Understand your partner and understand yourself and what you both want and make sure that it is the same thing. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t101293/ " i dont understand how he can love me so much one day and then not then next. he told me even if we arent together i am still his angel and no one will ever know him or love him like i did...why say that" My ex said this too. Well - he isnt my ex anymore - we are back together and I didnt follow no contact. If he says he still loves you and misses you _genuinly_, then give him time. Stay in contact but keep it minimal. If he is telling you to stay away from him - then do so. He will contact you when he is ready. My ex wanted to stay in contact - so the situation maybe was different - but give him time and space to think and sort his head out. He is confused at the moment. It's hard - but if you dont give him space - it will ruin any chance you have of getting back together.
whir Posted October 29, 2006 Posted October 29, 2006 the thread that I sugets would help "compilation of best advices on how to win som1 bck"..is not totaly dependent to doing nc...its not all about doing nc..read the 4 advices not just the first one.
Author so lost Posted October 30, 2006 Author Posted October 30, 2006 how long were you and your partner apart for? a long time or a short time? it has been over 8 months we havent been together but have had contact now im giving him space to miss me
Guest Posted October 30, 2006 Posted October 30, 2006 that i never said i had fallen out of love but that my association with how things are is toxic to me. and for the record gf broke up with me long ago, and all i did a couple of months ago was assure her i am not the fall back guy. living in hope and searching without purpose just brings me back to the place i was, and its made me relapse but thankful i am strong and focus harder. what nc and forum communication has done is simply make me association with the past immediately become toxic and that's unacceptable. so - i am sorry if i popped back in to see if u would simply say 'hello' but u begin unable to do that is unhealthy for me - so i have to go and focus 100% elsewhere. i don't agree about if we had met at a different time, i just think we needed to work togehther, trust, and communicate and it would have been a great love story. i wish u the best from my heart.
whir Posted October 30, 2006 Posted October 30, 2006 how long were you and your partner apart for? a long time or a short time? it has been over 8 months we havent been together but have had contact now im giving him space to miss me dude every guy has different scenarious but..Ill suggest expect it from 2 monts to a year..i get my ex back after 3 months of stricty no contact..my friend got his gf after 6mo's of no contact
Author so lost Posted October 31, 2006 Author Posted October 31, 2006 what is Guest going on about and what does this have to do with me? are you aiming this at me or at someone who broke up wit you??
Guest Posted November 1, 2006 Posted November 1, 2006 that i never said i had fallen out of love but that my association with how things are is toxic to me. and for the record gf broke up with me long ago, and all i did a couple of months ago was assure her i am not the fall back guy. living in hope and searching without purpose just brings me back to the place i was, and its made me relapse but thankful i am strong and focus harder. what nc and forum communication has done is simply make me association with the past immediately become toxic and that's unacceptable. so - i am sorry if i popped back in to see if u would simply say 'hello' but u begin unable to do that is unhealthy for me - so i have to go and focus 100% elsewhere. i don't agree about if we had met at a different time, i just think we needed to work togehther, trust, and communicate and it would have been a great love story. i wish u the best from my heart. who is this from??? someone telling there own story?? is it possible it is my ex???
Author so lost Posted November 1, 2006 Author Posted November 1, 2006 that i never said i had fallen out of love but that my association with how things are is toxic to me. and for the record gf broke up with me long ago, and all i did a couple of months ago was assure her i am not the fall back guy. living in hope and searching without purpose just brings me back to the place i was, and its made me relapse but thankful i am strong and focus harder. what nc and forum communication has done is simply make me association with the past immediately become toxic and that's unacceptable. so - i am sorry if i popped back in to see if u would simply say 'hello' but u begin unable to do that is unhealthy for me - so i have to go and focus 100% elsewhere. i don't agree about if we had met at a different time, i just think we needed to work togehther, trust, and communicate and it would have been a great love story. i wish u the best from my heart. is this related to someones personal experience or is this aimed at me?? is this my ex?
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