stillhere Posted October 24, 2006 Posted October 24, 2006 i hardly feel it was necessary to call me a moron! firstly you dont know me ! you do not know my mm !!!! i asked for advice not to called names !!! now whos the MORON !!!!!!!!!!! I was going to reply to this thread, until i saw this. I was all for helping, but i've changed my mind...................
denise296 Posted October 25, 2006 Posted October 25, 2006 i find your comments a little harsh!! my head is not up my arse !! i do respect my self !!! 100 's of mm make lodes of promises and they never keep them !!!! "oh yes im definately leaving her , i want a life with you " blah blah blah !! catch my drift??? my mm treats me very well !!!! and has never let me down !! and as for the other comment.....hes using you !! if he was using me......he would not take to restaurants local to wear we live , and be so open with his affections in public , call me and text me every day, buy me stuff , pay my car insurance shall i go on !!! just a little harsh and not the advise i am looking for!!! maybe us english r a little different !!! O.K So just what was the response you were expecting??? if you are so happy and you believe that what you have is real then you would not have taken your time to post on this board. The fact is that you realize and know that the relationship is doomed! If he truly loved you then he would make the relationship real and he would do what he needs to do to be truly with you. What you and MM are enjoying is fantasy, when he goes home to his wife that is reality. I am not trying to be harsh and although some of the other posters may appear to be harsh it is just because they have heard it all before and so have I. nothing about you or your relationship is different from any other affair. He may care about you and he may even love you, BUT he doesnt care or love you ENOUGH to end his marriage to be with you. Do what you will but my advice is to move on and spare yourself the drama and pain in the end!!!
Seen_It_All Posted October 25, 2006 Posted October 25, 2006 "hes never made me any promises .....and i totally respect him for that. What will become of us??? help x:lmao: I think you answered your own question. He hasn't made any promises for a REASON - and that reason is because he likes things just the way they are. He's got a girlfriend he can control with money and dinners out, and a wife and home he ain't giving up for nuthin' - not even you. Sweet deal he's got. Why WOULD he change it? Glad you respect a lying weasel. Can you hook me up?
PoshPrincess Posted October 25, 2006 Posted October 25, 2006 So, I'm confused here. Please tell me how a relationship that started as a lie can really work out? He either lied to you about being married and or lied to his wife about you. Either way he is a proven lier. What makes you think he is being truthful in your relationship? I'm sorry, but life isn't that black and white. One lie doesn't make someone a 'liar' no matter how big. Every sitch is different. I know that you will say that you are different, that your relationship is different, but how do you know for sure? Can you say that you trust him completely? I'm sure his wife thought that he was being honest when he took the marriage vows. An honest person ends one relationship before they start a new one. What will happen when he gets bored or needs to stoke his ego some more? How will you know? I don't think you can trust anyone completely, not even in a conventional relationship but of course you do unless they prove they are not to be trusted, in which case you may start to doubt their loyalty. Just because someone has cheated once (ok, more than once with the same person), it doesn't necessarily mean they will do it to another. No two relationships are the same. In most cases, none of us know what is going on in our own MMs head, never mind anyone elses. I suppose if we love someone enough we give them the benefit of the doubt, cross our fingers and hope everything will work out in our favour. In my case it didn't but in Sassiex's case maybe it will. Sassie, you could look at your sitch in two different ways. He hasn't promised you will be together because he has no intention of leaving his wife. On the other hand, as he hasn't said this in so many words (I am assuming?) it may not necessarily mean that he isn't going to - just that he doesn't want to give you false hope unless he has something concrete to tell you. So, yes, I can understand how you would respect him for this. My MM told me (and others) he loved me, I was his whole world, he couldn't live without me, he would leave his W (I NEVER asked him to), he'd marry me, spend the rest of his life with me, I was 'the one', the love of his life, he'd never felt like this before about ANYONE (and I felt all these things about him too), etc etc and I truly believe he meant it at the time, but at the end of the day he chose to stay with his wife. Better for you not to be made these promises in the first place unless your MM can guarantee he will keep them. I have had my heart broken like I never thougt possible and would hate that to happen to you. Maybe you should ask him if he sees a future for the two of you if that's what you truly want from him, but be prepared for this to make him back off if, deep down, he's only in it for the fun. Keep us posted!
Author sassiex Posted October 26, 2006 Author Posted October 26, 2006 I don't think you can trust anyone completely, not even in a conventional relationship but of course you do unless they prove they are not to be trusted, in which case you may start to doubt their loyalty. Just because someone has cheated once (ok, more than once with the same person), it doesn't necessarily mean they will do it to another. No two relationships are the same. In most cases, none of us know what is going on in our own MMs head, never mind anyone elses. I suppose if we love someone enough we give them the benefit of the doubt, cross our fingers and hope everything will work out in our favour. In my case it didn't but in Sassiex's case maybe it will. Sassie, you could look at your sitch in two different ways. He hasn't promised you will be together because he has no intention of leaving his wife. On the other hand, as he hasn't said this in so many words (I am assuming?) it may not necessarily mean that he isn't going to - just that he doesn't want to give you false hope unless he has something concrete to tell you. So, yes, I can understand how you would respect him for this. My MM told me (and others) he loved me, I was his whole world, he couldn't live without me, he would leave his W (I NEVER asked him to), he'd marry me, spend the rest of his life with me, I was 'the one', the love of his life, he'd never felt like this before about ANYONE (and I felt all these things about him too), etc etc and I truly believe he meant it at the time, but at the end of the day he chose to stay with his wife. Better for you not to be made these promises in the first place unless your MM can guarantee he will keep them. I have had my heart broken like I never thougt possible and would hate that to happen to you. Maybe you should ask him if he sees a future for the two of you if that's what you truly want from him, but be prepared for this to make him back off if, deep down, he's only in it for the fun. Keep us posted! thanks for your wise words, about the only ones ive got from this thread ! just noticed your in london too , would love to know your story....maybe we could help eachother.....through these harrowing times x thanx again saskia x
Author sassiex Posted October 26, 2006 Author Posted October 26, 2006 decided going to ask him,if we have a future together ! wish me luck
Author sassiex Posted October 26, 2006 Author Posted October 26, 2006 feel sick......really nervous about what im going to ask mm
Author sassiex Posted October 26, 2006 Author Posted October 26, 2006 really really nervous.........going to throw up
reneet Posted October 26, 2006 Posted October 26, 2006 feel sick......really nervous about what im going to ask mm I think you are nervous about his response, not what you're going to ask him. Hang in there, take a deep breath & just ask.
Guest Posted October 26, 2006 Posted October 26, 2006 In reality by asking, can it really get any worse than your feeling right now?
NoIDidn't Posted October 26, 2006 Posted October 26, 2006 through these harrowing times x thanx again saskia x You are kidding right? I thought you were in love? How are the times harrowing? Between this statement and your anger at Reneet's signature, you would probably do better figuring out how this board works before you can begin to understand what is going on in your "R" with MM. THX for the laughs.
Seen_It_All Posted October 27, 2006 Posted October 27, 2006 Amen, NoIdidn't. Jesus, it's like hanging out with a gaggle of junior high teenagers reading this bilge.
BUTAFLY Posted October 27, 2006 Posted October 27, 2006 Doh! Is your signiture a Howard Stern reference?
BenThereDunThat Posted October 27, 2006 Posted October 27, 2006 Amen, NoIdidn't. Jesus, it's like hanging out with a gaggle of junior high teenagers reading this bilge. Simple solution - quit reading!
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