Guest Posted October 22, 2006 Posted October 22, 2006 why must people go on and on and on and on....lol well, because it is just part of whatever stage / medium two people choose to use... and actually, when u think about it, there are so many spooky / same things that happened thru the relationship - and that is a kewl thing... u know what? her and i met on the internet and we ended there too. things were always like that. we took our beginning off the web and made it real. we could do that. i could do it in the end. but she couldn't. that's life. i know that she understands what i am saying about the 'real' and the reason for it. i know that until she is able to simply walk up and talk with the very person that went thru all this with, she will not take control of what she believes control is all about. and i am not telling her what to do. she knows all this stuff. when i looked into her eyes, mine filled with tears, raped by depression and addiction, knowing in my mind and soul just by looking in her eyes that it was done, i found the only thing she had been giving me for day one - honesty. i allowed me to walk up to my dad and tell him i had become addicted to something that took chunks out of my body..i hugged my mom and told her - here, your son, loved someone, and thru depression verbally abused his love of his life, let his child witness the fall, EVeRYTHING i will never be the same because of this - and that is soooooooooooo great so anyhooooooooooooooooo, c and i could do this until we are 78 years old but we won't...and i do not expect her to do anything other than what she feels is best for herself... i can't promise i will never be back on here...posting rambling bits of nonsense again...but i can promise to her, that i will never be the flip flop person i was in the past...confidence is about be consistent...taking a stance and sticking with it only when it is best for those involved and when u have reached out, and when u finally just do, the same thing she must decide what u want i want her to find her happiness and i want to do the same and we already had our '30 seconds out of a lifetime moment' - so i will do my very best to not post here anymore, or on fish, or anywhere else for that fact.... i am saying goodbye to C here in Net World - she is welcome to say hello in REAL LIFE... TAKE CARE OF L THE BEST U CAN - BECAUSE THAT'S THE FUTURE...YOUR SHADOW [DON'T BE YOUR MOTHER FOR HER - YOU WILL DO GREAT THINGS]
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