Guest Posted October 19, 2006 Posted October 19, 2006 HI all, Im now in the unenviable position of catching up with my ex for probably the last time, early next weeek. Im moving across the country for work, and she is looking at travelling abroad for the next few years. And life being how it is means chances are, unless major efforts are made, we will drift apart. Evenm when shes done traveling, she is from a town about 3 hrs drive from my home city, so chances of "catching up" will be slim. Why does this bother me? I still love her and care for her immensly, and she still loves me, it was just that a relationship is not what she needs, shes exploring herself etc. Not really a question here, its just my thoughts on screen. Man, its gonna be tough to say goodbye to someone you love and who loves you...forever.
Rooster_DAR Posted October 20, 2006 Posted October 20, 2006 HI all, Im now in the unenviable position of catching up with my ex for probably the last time, early next weeek. Im moving across the country for work, and she is looking at travelling abroad for the next few years. And life being how it is means chances are, unless major efforts are made, we will drift apart. Evenm when shes done traveling, she is from a town about 3 hrs drive from my home city, so chances of "catching up" will be slim. Why does this bother me? I still love her and care for her immensly, and she still loves me, it was just that a relationship is not what she needs, shes exploring herself etc. Not really a question here, its just my thoughts on screen. Man, its gonna be tough to say goodbye to someone you love and who loves you...forever. Make it a good goodbye, this might leave the future open between you and her. Goodbyes suck!
Tormented Posted October 20, 2006 Posted October 20, 2006 I agree with Rooster. No matter how hard it will be to do, you MUST part on a positive...even tender moment. This will be the moment she will remember you by, and if done right, it just might be the moment that brings her back because she'll find that she misses you and wants you back in her life. NEVER say never. ~T~
everlong Posted October 20, 2006 Posted October 20, 2006 wow. those moments happen once in a lifetime. treat each other with love and kindness and hug each other so tight like u imagine you are becoming one. it is very hard when two people who love each other so deeply must part and the fact that both of you have such different reasons [one for work, the other for travel] is a tell-tale sign that both of you are heading in different directions. i wish you both a wonderful last goodbye. just on a personal note: if i knew in my heart of hearts that this one person was the love of my life, and that they felt the same way, and we both had communicated that, if would never be able to put work, travel, hobby, etc, ahead of the person i love. u can always find work, you can always travel later - but u may never find another such love again. just my 2 cents
Guest Posted October 20, 2006 Posted October 20, 2006 All true. Im a bit worried shel go all distant on me, its one of her defense mechanisms. Tough choice in regards to work etc. and I'm not sure shes "the one" ( not convinced on the whole "the one concept") all I know is shes very special to me, but timings not right. Shes 22, and shes got some things she need to get done (travel, etc) which unfortunately dont involve me ( or anyone for that matter). and if she doesnt do so now, it will come out in the future. On the flip side, I cant put my career on hold for something so unstable as a relationship, especially with a girl whos at an unstable, itchy-feet kind of stage. I know its a bit cliche, but you never know what the future brings. Case in point is my brother, dated a girl when they were 16-20, broke up, she travelled ( must be the thing to do at that age ) He met an was engaged to a girl at 29, it fell apart.He was shattered, until he bumped into the one who had been travelling at a bar, they are now married with three kids.... Not putting my hopes on that, but you never know.
Rooster_DAR Posted October 20, 2006 Posted October 20, 2006 I will tell you that you both should see other people if you must, I wouldn't count on her to not do that. I do think this has a potential for a great love story if you find eachother again someday. Good luck!
cpt101 Posted October 24, 2006 Posted October 24, 2006 Well just happened, and it went just OK. She was a bit distant, but then I was a bit too. Communication wasnt our strong point. She said that she loved me but not in 'that way'. And that we were never going to work etc. And wel never get back together, but were great friends (She is not friends with ANY of her exes). She said she had me to thank for her sanity. A friendly kiss and hug goodbye, and that I should be glad to know at least that she is in a really happy place. (She was a very unstable and insecure person when we started going out, I helped her through most of it, I got her out of a VERY destructive situation, in some ways, because of me, she can now look forward to a normal, happy life....without me- love the irony:D). Im moving across the country for work this week, so its time to focus on that, starting the new job and beginning a fresh start, all things to look forward to. Am I a bit let down/upset? Of course, but no regrets hey. At least things arnt hanging and I got some answers to my questions. Sometimes I wish I could turn back time though.......
cpt101 Posted October 24, 2006 Posted October 24, 2006 I will tell you that you both should see other people if you must, I wouldn't count on her to not do that. Agree totally. Easier for chicks though
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