Guest Posted October 19, 2006 Posted October 19, 2006 Hello fellow diary readers. I write from time to time on these pages, but for today I feel a need to ask you to bear with me whilst I pour out my poor broken heart to you all. You see, I have been dating the "most wonderful" married man now for 2 years. I'm crazy about him. We have talked of marriage many times and have spent the last few months buying a beautiful cottage in the Cotswolds. Today, the the keys were to be handed over. Oh joy. I woke this morning full of such excitement I could scarce pull myself together. I jumped in my car and headed off to meet him at the cottage as agreed. What happened next would shock and disgust anyone. I received a call on my mobile from his wife, the one he said he had split from, the one he said he didn't love, didn't sleep with, couldn't wait to get away from etc etc. She says she felt compelled to call me as he had taken her to our cottage and asked her for opinions on decor etc. I knew she was telling the truth. She told me lots more but to be honest I just can't bring myself to write it in these pages. Yes, I called him immediately and when I mentioned that she and I had spoken and that she had filled me in on their torrid relationship of the past few months, his deathly silence said it all. Can you imagine how I feel right now? Can you imagine how anyone could do this to another human being? I know I now have no choice but to put this whole rotten saga behind me and that starts today with this message on the diary pages. I may be weeping for Britain as I type, but there just has to be a light at the end of this deep, dark tunnel doesn’t there?
PoshPrincess Posted October 19, 2006 Posted October 19, 2006 Hello fellow diary readers. I write from time to time on these pages, but for today I feel a need to ask you to bear with me whilst I pour out my poor broken heart to you all. You see, I have been dating the "most wonderful" married man now for 2 years. I'm crazy about him. We have talked of marriage many times and have spent the last few months buying a beautiful cottage in the Cotswolds. Today, the the keys were to be handed over. Oh joy. I woke this morning full of such excitement I could scarce pull myself together. I jumped in my car and headed off to meet him at the cottage as agreed. What happened next would shock and disgust anyone. I received a call on my mobile from his wife, the one he said he had split from, the one he said he didn't love, didn't sleep with, couldn't wait to get away from etc etc. She says she felt compelled to call me as he had taken her to our cottage and asked her for opinions on decor etc. I knew she was telling the truth. She told me lots more but to be honest I just can't bring myself to write it in these pages. Yes, I called him immediately and when I mentioned that she and I had spoken and that she had filled me in on their torrid relationship of the past few months, his deathly silence said it all. Can you imagine how I feel right now? Can you imagine how anyone could do this to another human being? I know I now have no choice but to put this whole rotten saga behind me and that starts today with this message on the diary pages. I may be weeping for Britain as I type, but there just has to be a light at the end of this deep, dark tunnel doesn’t there? Guest, this sounds like a total nightmare and I feel SO bad for you! I'm sure there IS a light at the end of the tunnel for you, although I haven't got there myself yet either so not speaking from experience on that score. You must be going through so many emotions now it's untrue. What did his W say about their relationship? Are they still together/back together or are they just friends? Don't forget, what she says may not be entirely true as she will be wanting to hurt you. Ok, so it's obvious from his silence that he has taken her to your cottage, which is extremely hurtful for you, but what's the story there? Maybe he feels they can be just friends. Men sometimes have a very different viewpoint on these sort of things to us - he wouldn't necessarily see taking his W (if she IS a so-called friend) to your cottage. Everyone sees betrayal differently. I, for example, personally think one of the worse types of betrayal is discussing your relationship problems with a member of the opposite sex (in an EA kind of way!) although some others may see that as pretty harmless. Whatever the story though, he should have been honest from the beginning. Has he tried calling you to explain? Are you two totally over? I hope that if he HAS been lying to you and that there is something more in the relationship with his W that you have the strength to cut him out of your life and move on, as I am trying desperately to do. At least I am lucky in that my MM hasn't intentionally hurt me, although at least if he had I may be able to get to that hate and anger stage!!! Best of luck. We are always here for you to vent your anger/frustration and to just get things off your chest! Keep us updated
NoIDidn't Posted October 19, 2006 Posted October 19, 2006 Can you imagine how I feel right now? Can you imagine how anyone could do this to another human being? I really feel sorry for you. I really do. But I can't imagine what made you write the above. You entered into an A with HER H. She is probably thinking "how can [YOU] do this to [her]?" It doesn't seem like he left her at all. I received a call on my mobile from his wife, the one he said he had split from, the one he said he didn't love, didn't sleep with, couldn't wait to get away from etc etc. I am guessing that the horrible stuff she said was something along the lines of: they are still together, he does love her, they do sleep together, he isn't leaving or hasn't spoken of D with her. Honey, he was lying to you. His silence only revealed that he had been caught in his lies and he wasn't prepared with a new set of lies to tell you. He probably thought his W would never find out either. I hope you didn't spend money with him on this cottage. If he isn't D, his W is also a part owner (depending on where you live in the world). Hopefully you have the strength to leave him alone. This should be the end (but it rarely ever is).
outofdarkness Posted October 19, 2006 Posted October 19, 2006 Hello fellow diary readers. I write from time to time on these pages, but for today I feel a need to ask you to bear with me whilst I pour out my poor broken heart to you all. You see, I have been dating the "most wonderful" married man now for 2 years. I'm crazy about him. We have talked of marriage many times and have spent the last few months buying a beautiful cottage in the Cotswolds. Today, the the keys were to be handed over. Oh joy. I woke this morning full of such excitement I could scarce pull myself together. I jumped in my car and headed off to meet him at the cottage as agreed. What happened next would shock and disgust anyone. I received a call on my mobile from his wife, the one he said he had split from, the one he said he didn't love, didn't sleep with, couldn't wait to get away from etc etc. She says she felt compelled to call me as he had taken her to our cottage and asked her for opinions on decor etc. I knew she was telling the truth. She told me lots more but to be honest I just can't bring myself to write it in these pages. Yes, I called him immediately and when I mentioned that she and I had spoken and that she had filled me in on their torrid relationship of the past few months, his deathly silence said it all. Can you imagine how I feel right now? Can you imagine how anyone could do this to another human being? I know I now have no choice but to put this whole rotten saga behind me and that starts today with this message on the diary pages. I may be weeping for Britain as I type, but there just has to be a light at the end of this deep, dark tunnel doesn’t there? sorry for your pain..but I do tend to agree with noididn't..I am the W of a cheater, and your story sounds so typical..Cheaters will do or say anything to get what they want..Whether it's a neat, nice looking family to take to the folks for holidays or a romantic weekend with the OW...We all seem to be lied to...My H had many A's but one main one...She was also heartbroken when all of his cheating came out b/c she, too had been cheated on...There are always exceptions to the rule, but generally, lies and betrayal are just part of the game... Hope you're able to get some support and feel better soon..Reach out to friends, family, church, anywhere and anyone that you feel you can trust..Also, this forum is great...I never thought I'd get any support from a forum for the OWs, but I have and it's been very insightful and helpful to my healing process...
FELIZE Posted October 19, 2006 Posted October 19, 2006 It seems as though your whole relationship was lie. He is so rotton for that. Now here's my question(s)? Why in the world DID HE NOT CALL YOU HIMSELF?? What was the purpose for her calling you? [Guest quote:] "You see, I have been dating the "most wonderful" married man now for 2 years." Is he still married to this woman or married and seperated?
mopar crazy Posted October 19, 2006 Posted October 19, 2006 I jumped in my car and headed off to meet him at the cottage as agreed. What happened next would shock and disgust anyone I know your hurting but I had to comment on this. It doesn't shock or disgust me at all that she called you. Imagine the shock and disgust his W was feeling when she found out her H was having an A? I agree w/ NoIDidn't.
Guest Posted October 20, 2006 Posted October 20, 2006 I'm the "guest" that posted the thread "warning to all OW". I'm not surprrised at all to keep hearing stories like this. My "MM" lied and continues to lie to his W of over 13 years, plus me (his "college sweetheart") and several other young, naive women. The latest I found out is that he has been having regular sex with a woman from one of his company's subsidiaries. They talked in great detail about their sexual exploits, and the next mail was to at least three or four other women in other cities that he travels to. Plus of course the standard "I love you and miss you bunches" mail to his unsuspecting W. Plus he had the audacity to mail me today (which prompted me to look again) being all pissy and upset for "ignoring" him. Guys like this thrive on attention from women. He probably has a hard time with the fact that I, his former sweetheart, rejected him when we met and am now ignoring him. I'm sure many MM are like that - they lie with incredible ease and unfortunately they keep finding women who buy their BS or have wives who won't leave them no matter what, thus enabling their behavior.
Dayzie Posted October 20, 2006 Posted October 20, 2006 WOW! She got your number somehow...from him. The thing is, yes all of us have been lied to by our MM but yours bought a flipping house with you! That is a HUGE step for any two people to take esp with one who is still in a committed relationsip. Yes, the fact that he is married should stop you in your tracks but that isn't how life goes. He took a huge step with you and in a way 'proved' he loved you and wanted to be with you. If you did both put money into fight your butt off to get it back. Yes I feel bad for his wife and all the wives who's husbands have cheated, but I also feel bad for all the women who have fallen for a MM b/c no matter what, you cannot help who you fall in love with, end of story. We are not robots we can't turn off our feelings just b/c we know it's wrong. I'm very sorry for your pain and I hope that it all works out for you and you get your money back!!!
PoshPrincess Posted October 20, 2006 Posted October 20, 2006 I'm the "guest" that posted the thread "warning to all OW". I'm not surprrised at all to keep hearing stories like this. My "MM" lied and continues to lie to his W of over 13 years, plus me (his "college sweetheart") and several other young, naive women. The latest I found out is that he has been having regular sex with a woman from one of his company's subsidiaries. They talked in great detail about their sexual exploits, and the next mail was to at least three or four other women in other cities that he travels to. Plus of course the standard "I love you and miss you bunches" mail to his unsuspecting W. Plus he had the audacity to mail me today (which prompted me to look again) being all pissy and upset for "ignoring" him. Guys like this thrive on attention from women. He probably has a hard time with the fact that I, his former sweetheart, rejected him when we met and am now ignoring him. I'm sure many MM are like that - they lie with incredible ease and unfortunately they keep finding women who buy their BS or have wives who won't leave them no matter what, thus enabling their behavior. Sounds like I had a pretty lucky escape compared to some. My MM was more or less a decent, moral bloke who didn't find it easy to cheat (hence why he is now my ex-MM!) He just made the mistake of falling in love with me, but I think he ha now seen the error of his ways, luckily for his wife (but not so lucky for me eh?!) Still, I've known plenty of other a**holes in my time, some who cheat, marry and then continue to cheat after their wedding day with either one woman or several different ones! Unbelievable!
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