Great Gazoo Posted October 10, 2006 Posted October 10, 2006 I was just wondering if any one has abopted a child that has FAS or has a child with it. A neighbors daughter adopted a girl that has it, she has grown up in her twenties now, she always seem normal but very high strung, a reall chatter box. She still lives with her parents and my neighbors thinks she can never really live on her own which surprised me, I always thought she was just a little hyper, it was just recently I found out she has FAS. The reason I am asking is because it seems like the only solution for us to have a child, that the only children available on short terms have FAS. We wont wait 5 to 6 years, I don't want to be a father at that age, I don't think I want to sell part of my business or my whole business to adopt overseas. Basically I don't see our marriage surviving without a child so was thinking maybe this is the only solution.
Guest Posted October 10, 2006 Posted October 10, 2006 It would be a massive mistake to adopt a child with health issues to try to save a marriage. You must deal with the issues in the marriage first. The stresses involved with dealing with a child like that will blow a fragile marriage to smithereens.
Guest Posted October 11, 2006 Posted October 11, 2006 Hi, a friends child had FAS and I doubt if he will ever hold a job above retrieving carts at the local supermarket. It's important to inform yourself before you make any large life change. Example: There are degrees of FAS; infact many of them have hidden physical ailments that can be quite expensive ie: heart Does your insurance company cover a preexisting condition if you adopt a baby knowing they have problems? My friend is often embarassed abour her sons behavior in public because he interupts, is not aware of other peoples conversation.....basically he's like a five year old in social skills. That being said, she loves him to bits and says he is a gift from God, and that he reminds her to never take drugs and drink again because our actions do affect others. Take your time and be sure. Good luck with your decision, Guest
Author Great Gazoo Posted October 11, 2006 Author Posted October 11, 2006 It would be a massive mistake to adopt a child with health issues to try to save a marriage. You must deal with the issues in the marriage first. The stresses involved with dealing with a child like that will blow a fragile marriage to smithereens. Yeah I would Agree with this but its the fact of not having a child that is making the marriage fragile. Only a woman who wants children could understand this. I understand it because I am married to one and have seen the enormous pain it puts on her. Also the death of our baby, the miscarriage, the infertility doctors, etopic pregnancy, all the damn doctors blah blah blah would seem to leave a bad vibe in the air. Its hard to have this as your final result in trying to be a family and continue on your merry way.
Author Great Gazoo Posted October 11, 2006 Author Posted October 11, 2006 Hi, a friends child had FAS and I doubt if he will ever hold a job above retrieving carts at the local supermarket. It's important to inform yourself before you make any large life change. Example: There are degrees of FAS; infact many of them have hidden physical ailments that can be quite expensive ie: heart Does your insurance company cover a preexisting condition if you adopt a baby knowing they have problems? My friend is often embarassed abour her sons behavior in public because he interupts, is not aware of other peoples conversation.....basically he's like a five year old in social skills. That being said, she loves him to bits and says he is a gift from God, and that he reminds her to never take drugs and drink again because our actions do affect others. Take your time and be sure. Good luck with your decision, Guest Yeah thats kinda scary. I have a very distant relative who adopted a child that they thought had FAS, maybe the child did but had hidden ailments as you said. Anyway they ended up trying to sue because the child ended up with MS. The health care is not a problem, its all free here. So I still don't know if this is a option. It takes a special person to handle this but sometimes any child for us would be a gift from god. Lots to think about. Thanks for the reply.
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