crystal32 Posted October 5, 2006 Posted October 5, 2006 Hi- My bf and I had a major argument a couple of weeks ago and we decided to take a break for a week to clear our thoughts. We have been together for about a year. Basically what happened was that I snooped through his phone while he was in the shower and found out that he was texting his ex behind my back.(He was with this ex for 6 years and he broke it off with her so he could be with me) What made me snoop in the first place though was because he was acting suspicious in that he would turn off his phone whenever I was over at his house and he would leave his phone by the door so I wouldnt be near it. I guess my suspicions were correct...Anyhow I confessed what I saw and he broke down apologizing saying that they were just texting as friends and he was not seeing her behind my back or anything like that. He said he was scared she would call thats why he turned his phone off. I was deeply hurt though and was devestated that he was hiding this from me. All this time we were talking about our futures together and how much we loved eachother and at the same time he was contacting his ex even though he told me a few months before that he had nothing to do with her anymore! He said that SHE texted him first and he was just replying to her mails. BTW this is the second time I snooped and the first time I also found that he was calling the same ex occassionaly (maybe once a month) Thing is....we are always together everyday and therefore I thought that there was no way he could be cheating on me. We had some serious talks about this and he said he was just really really stupid and had no bad intentions, such as cheating an such whatsoever. He seemed like he really meant this...as he was crying and a complete wreck. A couple of days after the argument and after calling me 20 times a day begging for my forgiveness he decided to suddenly take off and leave the country for a couple weeks so he can get his act together. (He went back to his home country to be with his family) He said that he was under a lot of stress and that taking a vacation would make him a "better man"...In the beginning I was supportive of his decision but now I feel like hes just running away from the problem and that he should be comforting me and trying to make our relationship better instead of just jetting off when things are still up in the air! I mean hes the one that betrayed me! Right now i am feeling a whole bunch of mixed emotions. I love him and want to work things out but at the same time I am not sure if I can trust him and I feel like hes really weak...Also I am contemplating writing an email to his ex asking whether there is really nothing going on...Thing is I only know her company email address. Is this a bad idea or am I just making things worse for myself? I am not sure what to do and I want to sort out my feelings.
Jane Doe Posted October 5, 2006 Posted October 5, 2006 This guy doesn't sound like a keeper to me. He's continually in contact with his ex girlfriend and then just ups and leaves the country knowing you're upset. WTF??? If this is any indication of what life would be like with him long-term then my suggestion is for you to email his ex and tell her to please take him off your hands.
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