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Posted

Hi guys, aint posted in a while, been trying not to to be honest :(

 

Well things are pretty much the same. f you've read my other posts you''ll get me. Im very confused right now. We have spoken EVERY single day since he went back to the states, he phones me, infact, its always been him who phoned me, i phoned him for the first time today and he phoned me right back.

Im very very confused. Like discussedin my last post, he asked me to go visit him in the states, whereas my frame of mind was "why? what is the point?" im still there.... i don't see the point atall.

 

Im wondering wether in his eyes, he wants a best friend still in me. I kinda like that. Ya know? we talk everyday about absolutely everything, he's helping me with a situation now and again and hes lovely to talk to. I think we get on better now than we did while together. Im just terrified hes gonna ask me to go visit him again. I really just don't want him to ask, cos i'll say yes, because i know if i say no he'll think negatively and not want to talk to me, i mean woldnt you? you'd think "ok, she doesnt want to see my again, she doesn't wanna know me" or something along those lines. I also know, that when he comes back to England for a while. hes gonna wanna meet up. I dont want to lower myself into havng sex with him again. Like i did last time he visited. Because afterwards, even though i said i wouldnt, i felt very used and dirty.

 

I'm unsure as to wether i should cut off contact shortly before i know hes coming to England,... to stop him trying to meet me, though im also sure that wont work. I want to be able to say "ya know, you should of thought about the fact that you'd miss me before you left me" he cant just pick and choose right? i really have a point to this. I feel very low.

 

I've found myself txting a guy whom i really like, but i feel like im betraying my ex and keeping it a secret, whereas ive been totally honest about my feelings for my ex to this guy, and he is still persistent. I think this post is making no sense. Im just at a crappy point right now. I dont know if my ex wants me or is using me. I never would have thought he would do that but im doubting it now.

I mean, i dont want to ruin our friendship, because despite everything it is a great one.

 

any input would be appreciated :) sorry for going on a bit

Posted

why would you waste your money on coming to the states to see a man that is not worth your time. And you shoul not feel guilty about being interested in someone else your man here in the states is obivously not worth your time....he is stringing you along get rid of him....its sooo long distance so it should be easy to end it

 

this guy doesnt live in virginia does he?

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Posted

lol no not Virginia im afraid, why do you ask?

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