slopitch12 Posted September 26, 2006 Share Posted September 26, 2006 Ok here is my story I was in a Physical and mental abuse relationship with my first husband for 5 yrs .Then i got out of that and was in a mental abuse realtionship for another 3 yrs with a old boyfriend .After that I meet the most wonderful man and married him .I have been married to my husband now for 10yrs .He is a loving and care man and is the total opposite of all the other men I have been with in the pass.He also put me on a pedestal and treat melike a queen here is what happen .Six month ago I had a 4 week affair on my husband .With a man who was a mental abuser .I thought I didn't deserve what my husband gave me 24/7 .The guy who I had the affair with treat me like a whore and piece of trash .He was just worrying about his need and that was it . Like I said it end after 4 week .I said to my self what are you doing you have a great husband at home and you are with this loser.After talk with a couslner I came to learn that this guy made me go back in to my pass and treat me like i was treat before .It was like I was two differ people .I now know I deserve all the love my husband has to offer me .As of 6 month we are still together and doing well. He has been such a big help with everything .He has read up on about abuse victim and about how a abuser work on the other person mind .. My question is this a rare case .Has anyone been in a situations like this before and know of someone that has ... Thank you for all your help Link to post Share on other sites
napoleandynamite Posted September 27, 2006 Share Posted September 27, 2006 i'm not in your shoes...but my opinion on your situation is you tend to attract men who are abusive to you in one way or another. You need to find the reason why you find men like this. Did you grow up in a home where your father abused your, your sibling(s), or your mother? Your affair was wrong. But it sounds like you sought out that particular man who had the potential to be abusive to fullfill a void you have been lacking in your love life for a long period. You sound co-dependant on men who abuse you in relationships. I don't know of anyone in your shoes, but I am sure this is not as an uncommon situation as you think. Seek therapy to check your motives and investigate your past history. Link to post Share on other sites
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