joriel Posted September 26, 2006 Posted September 26, 2006 You were in love. You were planning a future together. And now, you're broken-up. So what are you doing to find yourself again?
Author joriel Posted September 26, 2006 Author Posted September 26, 2006 When I first started dating my ex I was fun, witty, always busy, and oh so confident. Over the course of our relationship I stopped being flirtatious, I stopped hanging out with my friends, and I stopped making decisions. So, I figure, now is as good of a time as ever to find myself again. On Saturday I made it a point to go out with my friends and have a good time. I went to the bar that I wanted to go to because I didn't feel the need to go somewhere because someone else wanted to. I've reunited with my best friend from years ago and we've started to rebuild our friendship. I rejoined the gym and signed up for the spinning sessions that I want to take b/c now I don't have to plan my schedule around her visits to town.
Tony T Posted September 26, 2006 Posted September 26, 2006 You were in love. You were planning a future together. And now, you're broken-up. So what are you doing to find yourself again? What does breaking up have to do with finding yourself? If you lost your identity and forgot who you are when you are in a relationship...it was the very best thing that it ended. Relationships are meant to enhance the individual that we are, not diminish us. Why people have twisted this love stuff up so bad is such a puzzle to me.
Author joriel Posted September 26, 2006 Author Posted September 26, 2006 I don't think that finding myself means that I lost my identity or that I didn't know who I was while in my relationship. Moreso I would say that my partner and I eventually started to merge our lives together and strike balances between what we wanted to do and what we had to do. I don't at any time think that was a bad thing. However, as a single person I can do what I want and disregard how my actions directly impact my life with a SO. I'm not saying that my ex hindered me from doing any of the above (in fact she would have supported me unconditionally). But for me, I put other things on the back burner in order to spend the limited time that I had with my SO. I don't regret that for a second. So yes, I'm finding my single, independent self.
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