LakeGirl Posted September 21, 2006 Posted September 21, 2006 Been having unaswered sexual needs that the husband is not fulfilling. Having thoughts of having an affair - purely for the passion missing in the marriage. Life is great besides the lack of passion and desire. Happily maried for 20+ years, no kids. I have talked with a few men openly about what I am lacking and I am amazed to hear the number of woman that are not even interested in keeping their husband happy. One gentleman I spoke with has had a LTR with his lover for over 5 years and he says he only keeps going to her for sex so he can last longer when he is with the wife. (What a line that is) But there are a ton of guys out there staying in the marriage only for the kids. So they look for passion elsewhere. Just looking for for some input - want to hear the in's and out's (no pun intended) of having a sexual affair. Can it fulfill your needs or does it leave you wanting more? Can it stay sexual or do your emotions take over? Is anyone out there living this pipe dream? Just curious
superconductor Posted September 21, 2006 Posted September 21, 2006 I am amazed to hear the number of woman that are not even interested in keeping their husband happy. Happens all the time, sweetie, all the time. Can it stay sexual or do your emotions take over? Generally speaking, men have a better time keeping emotions out of the equation than women, but that's not always the case. It's simply too dependent on the personalities involved. Is anyone out there living this pipe dream? *guffaw* Pipe dream? heh heh... *ahem* Anyway, I did it for a while with a small cluster of FWB relationships, but gave that up after I started to develop feelings for one of them.
stillhere Posted September 21, 2006 Posted September 21, 2006 Well, i can tell you this. My MM and I started out as FWB. Today, i can tell you that it didn't even sort of go as planned! I fell in love with him, and he kept telling me not to. Well, wouldn't you know, he fell in love with me too, hard. We're insanely crazy about each other, and he's even thinking now of leaving his W for me. Not sure that will ever happen, but if someone had told me a year ago that we would be where we are now, i would have laughed. NO, FWB rarely works out. One or both people usually start to have feelings.
scaredinlove Posted September 21, 2006 Posted September 21, 2006 It all depend if you lover will be agood lover , but if you are in a happy marriage mabe you should spice things up at home.There is a lot of pain in a affair and if you fall in love is even worse.
Meaplus3 Posted September 21, 2006 Posted September 21, 2006 It all depend if you lover will be agood lover , but if you are in a happy marriage mabe you should spice things up at home.There is a lot of pain in a affair and if you fall in love is even worse. I think if you are overall satisfied with your marriage than you should spare the pain an affair could cause you. I know this because I am there right now. I have fallen crazy in love with MM,( but still love my husband to some degree, not fully the way I used to. Once I started to let my feelings grow for MM I have felt like there's no turning back. If you can spice thing's up at home I would try that first. Good Luck, stay strong!! AP:)
inarut Posted September 25, 2006 Posted September 25, 2006 Been having unaswered sexual needs that the husband is not fulfilling. Having thoughts of having an affair - purely for the passion missing in the marriage. Life is great besides the lack of passion and desire. Happily maried for 20+ years, no kids. I have talked with a few men openly about what I am lacking and I am amazed to hear the number of woman that are not even interested in keeping their husband happy. One gentleman I spoke with has had a LTR with his lover for over 5 years and he says he only keeps going to her for sex so he can last longer when he is with the wife. (What a line that is) But there are a ton of guys out there staying in the marriage only for the kids. So they look for passion elsewhere. Just looking for for some input - want to hear the in's and out's (no pun intended) of having a sexual affair. Can it fulfill your needs or does it leave you wanting more? Can it stay sexual or do your emotions take over? Is anyone out there living this pipe dream? Just curious Please take a look at my past threads. I think I was/am in the same exact situation as you. I would love to hear your feedback.
stoopid_guy Posted September 25, 2006 Posted September 25, 2006 I have talked with a few men openly about what I am lacking and I am amazed to hear the number of woman that are not even interested in keeping their husband happy. I'm in that boat, and don't mind saying that if I met a married lady in a similar situation and there was a mutual attraction... It wouldn't be just sex though, intimacy and affection...
inarut Posted September 25, 2006 Posted September 25, 2006 I'm in that boat, and don't mind saying that if I met a married lady in a similar situation and there was a mutual attraction... It wouldn't be just sex though, intimacy and affection... OK. stoopid guy, I definitely need your feedback on my past threads!!! There was definitely mutual attraction on both our parts and the sex was really good. But then something happened.......Not sure what. Let me know what you think.
Author LakeGirl Posted September 25, 2006 Author Posted September 25, 2006 INARUT - how can I contact you? Do you yahoo? lakegirl119 would love to talk/chat
stoopid_guy Posted September 25, 2006 Posted September 25, 2006 OK. stoopid guy, I definitely need your feedback on my past threads!!! There was definitely mutual attraction on both our parts and the sex was really good. But then something happened.......Not sure what. Let me know what you think. Well... in a nutshell? He sounds like a jerk who was just using you for sex, then backed off when it got too serious. Stillhere gave you excellent advice.
Mz. Pixie Posted September 25, 2006 Posted September 25, 2006 No, because you start the affair because something is lacking. You think you can keep it all sexual. But what happens is you are so desperate to have what you didn't have that you start to develop feelings for that person. You can't help yourself- once they start meeting your deepest need then you'll be lost.
inarut Posted September 25, 2006 Posted September 25, 2006 INARUT - how can I contact you? Do you yahoo? lakegirl119 would love to talk/chat lakegirl119 - I would love to chat too. I can't seem to get yahoo to work. Do you have an e-mail? Not sure if you would want to give it out.
Sup Posted September 25, 2006 Posted September 25, 2006 Been having unaswered sexual needs that the husband is not fulfilling. Having thoughts of having an affair - purely for the passion missing in the marriage. Life is great besides the lack of passion and desire. Happily maried for 20+ years, no kids. I have talked with a few men openly about what I am lacking and I am amazed to hear the number of woman that are not even interested in keeping their husband happy. One gentleman I spoke with has had a LTR with his lover for over 5 years and he says he only keeps going to her for sex so he can last longer when he is with the wife. (What a line that is) But there are a ton of guys out there staying in the marriage only for the kids. So they look for passion elsewhere. Just looking for for some input - want to hear the in's and out's (no pun intended) of having a sexual affair. Can it fulfill your needs or does it leave you wanting more? Can it stay sexual or do your emotions take over? Is anyone out there living this pipe dream? Just curious Have you ever thought about telling your husband the things you are telling us? Have you ever thought about how much it would destroy your husband if he found out, and/or your marriage. Have you talked to your husband about these issues? Well to answer your question, if you have an affair, you could be riding someone with a larger member, have LOTS of orgasms, that's the up side. The downside, even if what I just mentions does happen, you could get AIDS, or other STDs, and pass it to your husband, and perhaps wind up killing him. You could get pregnant, try passing that one off to your husband, which I don't recommend, your husband would have to consider raising yours and OM's baby for the rest of his life, VERY UNFAIR to your husband, if he wanted to save the marriage. Your husband could walk in on you in the middle of one of your mind blowing orgasms with OM. Your hubby would ask you why you didn't say something to him about the problem/s, he probably doesn't even know there's something wrong. Another point, MEN are NOT mind readers, YOU have to tell them what's wrong, or what's on your mind, or what's going on. Have you even thought of the amount of pain you are about to inflict on your husband, whether he finds out or not. If you really want to do this, Divorce hubby now!!!!! So you don't kill him with what you are about to do. I hope you think of all these things, and don't just blow me off, this is VERY serious.
pricillia Posted September 25, 2006 Posted September 25, 2006 Been having unaswered sexual needs that the husband is not fulfilling. Having thoughts of having an affair - purely for the passion missing in the marriage. Life is great besides the lack of passion and desire. Happily maried for 20+ years, no kids. I have talked with a few men openly about what I am lacking and I am amazed to hear the number of woman that are not even interested in keeping their husband happy. One gentleman I spoke with has had a LTR with his lover for over 5 years and he says he only keeps going to her for sex so he can last longer when he is with the wife. (What a line that is) But there are a ton of guys out there staying in the marriage only for the kids. So they look for passion elsewhere. Just looking for for some input - want to hear the in's and out's (no pun intended) of having a sexual affair. Can it fulfill your needs or does it leave you wanting more? Can it stay sexual or do your emotions take over? Is anyone out there living this pipe dream? Just curious uless you are unhuman, your emotions will take over. then you loose all ablility with regards to rational thought. How can you be with someone that you just want for the sex, over and over again. 5 years for this gentleman without any emotion... please... I am sure it is possbile anything is possible. What are some of the things that you can do with your husband to bring some of the passion and attraction back?
Guest Posted September 29, 2006 Posted September 29, 2006 Just looking for for some input - want to hear the in's and out's (no pun intended) of having a sexual affair. Can it fulfill your needs or does it leave you wanting more? Can it stay sexual or do your emotions take over? Is anyone out there living this pipe dream? Just curious When my A started we were friends who met at work, we flirted contstantly. After leaving for another position at a different company, we crossed the line into a full blown sexual affair. It was supposed to be just for the sex, on both our parts. For me, after about six months, the emotioned kicked in and I became hooked, line and sinker. I fell in love with him, it's the worst feeling to be in love with someone who can not be with you. Although I am in love with him I do not want him to leave his family for me. I should have never let it go as far as it did, it's my mistake and I have to live with the pain. We are still lovers, we are still very good friends we talk everyday, we see each other several times a week, but he is not mine and I know that. So to answer your question, it is a pipe dream. Unless you are totally inhuman with no feelings, its not possible.
michelleryan Posted September 30, 2006 Posted September 30, 2006 Friends with Benefits does not work. There is always one person who wants more and everything blows out of control. Have you tried talking to your husband about your problems?
Guest Posted September 30, 2006 Posted September 30, 2006 Been having unaswered sexual needs that the husband is not fulfilling. Having thoughts of having an affair - purely for the passion missing in the marriage. Life is great besides the lack of passion and desire. Happily maried for 20+ years, no kids. I have talked with a few men openly about what I am lacking and I am amazed to hear the number of woman that are not even interested in keeping their husband happy. One gentleman I spoke with has had a LTR with his lover for over 5 years and he says he only keeps going to her for sex so he can last longer when he is with the wife. (What a line that is) But there are a ton of guys out there staying in the marriage only for the kids. So they look for passion elsewhere. Just looking for for some input - want to hear the in's and out's (no pun intended) of having a sexual affair. Can it fulfill your needs or does it leave you wanting more? Can it stay sexual or do your emotions take over? Is anyone out there living this pipe dream? Just curious A Sexual Affair is possible. I am involoved with a MM and I am very happy. We know its only sex and nothing else. The beauty is, neither one of us are emotionally envolved. It is pure sexual pleasure. When we are together I feel great. Now, you also asked if it just leaves you wanting more. My answer to that is: If you can understand it is just sex, it may leaving you wanting more sex but with the understanding, I have found it easy to not want more out of my MM other than sex. I know if I ever got more from him, if we were ever in a relationship, I wouldn't like him and I wouldn't want to have sex with him. We have awesome sex because it is just sex. So, you have a sexual affair without strings if your strong enough to leave it at that! Good luck!
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