kleeka Posted September 18, 2006 Posted September 18, 2006 ok here goes... there's a much younger guy at work (he's mid -late 20s and I'm late 30s) who I'll nickname CRUSH. he sits about 8 ft directly across from me and as a result, I'm right in his line of vision so we would often end up making quick (daring) eye contact. despite our physical proximity, we don't work together in any way at all but overlap in other areas. after a couple weeks of this seemingly flirtatious eye contact, I decided to get bold enough and just simply start small conversation to be friendly with CRUSH. BTW: small talk is indirectly part of my job. well it defintiely opened things up and due to the fact that he's a recent arrival from europe, I offered to play tour guide to him on a suitable weekend. he loved the idea and took me up on it one Friday by getting my number and typing it into his phone saying he'd call that night. he never did. when I saw him the following week I playfully swatted him on the head and asked what happened - he said he messed up typing in my number. I mockingly rolled my eyes and said "too bad - I thought you were interested..." and then I coolly went right to work. this time he left me a handwritten note while I was in a meeting. the note said to leave him my number and also had his number spelled out on it for me to keep. I wrote it out on my card plus my email address as I left for the day and said let's try again for this weekend ok? again, he never called. instead of holding my breath for CRUSH to call that second weekend, I stayed out late with some friends and almost let another young guy take me home with him. it gave me somewhat of a short-lived flattery and got my mind off CRUSH. so guess what CRUSH does the following monday night: he calls and I'm totally unaware of it because I had stupidly left my phone set to silent mode at work (!!$$@!?). so I actually didn't know about his voicemail until the next morning some 15 hours later when I'm checking for messages! at least CRUSH has left me a lengthy voicemail apologizing profusely for f*ing up twice and (jokingly) pleads with me to forgive him. he is so irresistibly charming on the voicemail and also says he wants to know where I was now so we could have dinner (evidently not a skilled planner). I decide it's best to text message him Tuesday afternoon instead of talking at work in front of people. I write: "sorry I missed your call - are you free for a drink after work Wed?" he writes: "Wed. is no good but how about Thurs? let's have dinner - it's on me." I write: "ok Thurs works." meanwhile I'm like dying of suspense of the unknown and its excitement. Thurs evening went well. we talked and laughed and talked and laughed and talked and laughed some more and found we had an awful lot in common. we hopped from one place to another around the city and in the end when time was up, he said he wanted to do another evening out like this again and I said definitely... BUT! he didn't kiss me (oh, how crushing!!). I was disappointed about that but I still believed there was chemistry. we txted many more times after that night out. in fact at one point I even wrote that one of the things we had in common seems to explain our attraction for each other. he replied that there wasn't any one particular thing that was causing 'it.'" inside my head i want to believe he was truly sincere about making up to me with dinner after failing twice to call. he really did come through in the end. I also think there was sincerity but mystery in the many txt msgs we sent each other. ok, now my questions: 1. did all that initial eye contact and body language suggest strong sexual interest in the beginning but then changed when we actually got to know each other outside of work? why did he ask me out to dinner but act platonically by the end of the night? I can't figure out if it was technically a date or not. 2. the mysteriousness of his last text msg has had me in a tailspin of confusion. is he trying to reveal something but keeping it cool at the same time, ie: trying to play it safe due to work plus our age difference? 3. if I'm the older woman here toying with an office crush while trying to avoid setting off any juicy work gossip, is he waiting for me to make all the first moves?
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