scaredinlove Posted September 16, 2006 Posted September 16, 2006 Well just venting. My MM and I are breaking up, his wife found out and things got very crazy. I don't believe that such a beautiful love can be ditched like that. Everybody tells me he is doing me very wrong, I try to see him with different eyes but I can't.I know he is a good person, he is not very brave. To give him up is the hardest thing I ever did my soul screen. NO!!!!!!! That cannot be true! I read once here in one ppost that the OW pain is worse than the W.The other woman has to suffer in silence, im my case that I am a MW too I have to keep a smile and my head up while my heart bleeds.All I want is lay down and cry for days.The W has everyone comforting her including the husband who cheated on her.The other woman has nobady, now I understand what the person meant when she wrote it.I still cannot believe it is over but thats the choice he made.My choice would be to tell the world.He told me he loved and that he would marry me one day ,and that we would had had many kids if we were ever together. He told me so many nice things, gave nice gifts,boxes of chocolate in the valentine's days.Love calls in the craziest hours.He always did something special for the holidays. I know it sounds really F***up but nobady treated ms so well ever.Now I just have to erase it, pretend it never happened, face my unhappy marriage and move on with my life.I just don't know how I will be able to do it knowing I won't hear his voice in the morning, that we won't make love again.That we will never share a bed all night.That was one of my dreams to share a night with him, without rush.I said once at least one night. I must confessed I dreamed that one day he would leave her.We talked about getting married .I imagined the cerimony the honey moon even a child.I had the name for the child.Now I have to forget all that.Forget his name ,his face, his voice ,his phone number.Forget how happy I was since I met him. It all lasted 5 yrs.I would just have to erase those yrs from my heart and memory. Other than you guys nobady will ever understand how it all felt and how I feel.I still can't believe it is over.Ther is still a little voice in my head saying, he might still chose you...I try to shut the voice up but it won't go away.I am sorry for the depressing long post.I am just needed to vent.
justice Posted September 16, 2006 Posted September 16, 2006 It looks as if you need to reevaluate your life and the direction it is now taking. I'm a BS, believe me it is really painful for us too, knowing about you all being with our spouse. But I can commiserate with you on your part too. You have to be strong. You have to let it go. He made his choices, now you have the choice of making your life into something alot more promising and bright or sinking into the darkness that has been created by all the deception. In my opinion, not that it matters, since he was married it probably wasn't meant to be anyway. Someday, you will find someone who can freely and openly return all of that love that from your post I can sense you have in your heart. I wish you well and I wish you healing. Stay strong.
justice Posted September 16, 2006 Posted September 16, 2006 If you are unhappy in your M, you may need to give that some serious thought also.
whichwayisup Posted September 16, 2006 Posted September 16, 2006 im my case that I am a MW too I have to keep a smile and my head up while my heart bleeds. Have you thought about telling your husband? I think he'd rather hear from you, that you were having an affair - Rather than from the MM's wife. Not trying to scare you, but there's a chance she may tell him.
Joelle Posted September 16, 2006 Posted September 16, 2006 SIL, I regret what you're going through. I hope you'll feel better soon.
Author scaredinlove Posted September 16, 2006 Author Posted September 16, 2006 Have you thought about telling your husband? I think he'd rather hear from you, that you were having an affair - Rather than from the MM's wife. Not trying to scare you, but there's a chance she may tell him. Hi I decided not to tell,I don't think she will contact him it has been a while now.I am not ready to have a explosion at home.I will eventually tell him when I am a little stronger.I want to sit down and see if ther is any future for this marriage, that has been unhappy to begin with.I am thinking of going for counseling for myself and for couple counseling.
Author scaredinlove Posted September 16, 2006 Author Posted September 16, 2006 SIL, I regret what you're going through. I hope you'll feel better soon. thanks Joelle.I hope I feel better too. And Justice youare very sweet thanks.
JamesM Posted September 16, 2006 Posted September 16, 2006 Aren't you the same SIL who was wondering if her husband was gay? Was the fact that your marriage was on the rocks the reason you had this affair? Do you think he will be upset if he is really gay?
Guest Posted September 18, 2006 Posted September 18, 2006 But I find it just incredible that people expect extramarital affairs to be anything but pain and heartache. Look, I've done some stupid things in my life, but I never had a forum where I could look for sympathy for doing the wrong thing in the first place. I am sure this pain is every bit as real as a legitimate relationship breaking up, but what did you expect? Nobody grows to an adult age in this culture without knowing that adultery is either wrong or very, very risky behavior. Next time date a single guy!
GreenEyedLady Posted September 18, 2006 Posted September 18, 2006 Guest: Why are you here then? People come here for support, encouragement and feedback. Your ignorance is appalling and your youth is evident.
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