JosiePosie Posted September 15, 2006 Posted September 15, 2006 Wow. It is exactly one year ago today that my ex and I split up. So much has happened over the past 12 months. A year ago I was crying my guts out, just completely in shock and confusion. If you want the jist of my story, just do a search on my threads. My ex is now engaged. When I first found out about him in a new relationship this past winter. I was crushed. However, as each month passed, I healed more and more. I learned alot from that experience. Don't give up your life for a relationship, take things slowly, and don't ignore the red flags. Those are my three major lessons learned. I haven't talked to my ex since our last night together a year ago. But I do see him once in awhile at various social functions. I no longer freak out whenever he is around, I just go about my business. I think what made my healing progress faster was by actually doing the things that I love. I am a cultural performer. Over the past months, I have performed for various schools, conferences, functions, and competitions in both Canada and the US. I also had the opportunity to perform in Taiwan for a month this summer. It really opened my eyes to all the people and places to experience in this world. Dancing made my spirit stronger. I finally had the courage to take a year absence from my government job to pursue university studies full-time. Then all of a sudden I was offered a 2 month contract to do volunteer management. Now I am doing both. As you can imagine, it is rather hectic at times. I started dating back in May. It was difficult and awkward at first. However, out of those dating experiences, I made some new acquaintances. I have also been steadily dating one man. We both have crazy schedules but manage to touch base once in awhile. He is none like the other men I have known. Kind, very respectful, traditional, treats me like a princess. I admit it is difficult to accept as I am used to the cat n mouse game. However, he has stuck by me whenever I tend to emotionally freak out. So who knows. I am really taking my time with him. We haven't even kissed and it is 4 months now...lol. Anyway, I just wanted to let ppl know who are currently going through a heartbreak that it does get better. Time heals, but what you do with that time is what makes the difference. I lost weight and sleep over my ex. Now I see it as a process that needed to be gone through. I still carry some feelings of anger over how he treated me, but now I have the satisfaction that I was able to overcome it, and make a better life for myself.
loveinlife Posted September 16, 2006 Posted September 16, 2006 Thanks for the encouragement JosiePosie. I really need it. My ex and I are friends at the moment. I try to stay cool but sometimes fall under my emotions. I bet you are glad that you have overcome such an obstacle that many of us dreaded. Its been a roller coaster ride for me. I hope things get better. I spoke to my ex today. Tonight I tried to call her two times, but she hasn't returned a call yet. So I am thinking, its still hard for me to let go. I believe its the same for her. But I believe she already has a bf... I dunno, I wish I could be a better friend so that I don't have to bug her when I need to talk to someone. I should really give myself respect. Thanks again JosiePosie.
loveinlife Posted September 16, 2006 Posted September 16, 2006 Yes, sleepless nights and weight loss, been hit those symptoms. Not healthy and wish I could be stronger like you JosiePosie. THANKS AGAIN!
Author JosiePosie Posted September 16, 2006 Author Posted September 16, 2006 Yes, I went through EVERYTHING in terms of thoughts and emotions that you are experiencing. Endless questions and trying not to wait for any form of communication from him. And when I found out that he had someone new, I bawled my eyes out and tried to move on. However, I kept my resolve and did not call him once. That's the one thing that I am glad that I did. I didn't go running back and beg for another chance. My brother in law once said to me "living well is the best revenge", so I threw myself into my performing. I think that is what literally saved me. It does get better people. The first year after a break up (depending on circumstances of course) is always the toughest. Just have faith it will get better.
db75 Posted September 16, 2006 Posted September 16, 2006 It does get better. I've been through several relationships now. The most recent ended about 2 months ago. I keep imagining what my life will be like a year from now. The pain will probably be mostly gone, I'll be living in a new town and probably have a new job. Who knows, maybe I'll even be dating a new woman. It is truly amazing what time can do for you.
Recommended Posts