Guest Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 I've been seeing a guy for three months. We've never made things explicit between us, in fact we refer to ourselves as 'friends'. However we go out alone for movies and dinner, have long conversations and have become extremely close, without actually making out or having sex. I would say we definitely have a strong friendship as a foundation, but right now we're in undefined territory. He says I am extremely important to him and he really likes me, but he's not emotionally ready for a relationship. I believe him because I understand his situation (long story) and he treats me wonderfully. He always calls when he says he will and does little special things for me. But I am starting to wonder if we will ever go anywhere serious because our relationship is too close and comfortable (for him) as it is. I know he has some leftover baggage and I want to support him 100% but I don't want to be sucked in either and end up broken hearted or friendzoned. I have read that alot of women invest time and affection on emotionally unavailable men only to get nothing out of it. Yet these same men turn around and commit to the next woman who comes along. Should I end it now and just keep him as a casual friend, or should I give him more time to get his head sorted? What sort of limits should I set?
Guest Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 Should I end it now and just keep him as a casual friend, or should I give him more time to get his head sorted? What sort of limits should I set? Congratulations! You made a friend! Now you can go out on REAL dates with REAL candidates. Just because he's sweet and nice LIKE A REALLY GOOD FRIEND doesn't automatically qualify you as 'dead' to the rest world Whatever you decide to do with this dude, don't ever put out. Seriously. If you do, nothing will come out of it, except resentment and contempt. Invest in him as you would with a new friend. Go out and have fun now and again, but don't ever get intimate with him. Intimacy requires emotional maturity, which he has clearly stated - albeit, not in so many words- has none. Good luck.
Recommended Posts