Guest Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 My H and I (we're in our late 20's and been together for a long time) have been having little fantasy talks and we have joked about doing a threesome with a woman, then he says he wouldn't do it b/c I would want to do a 3some with a guy. So here's my question. Not only do I think the girl thing is hot (does this make me Bi?) but I think the guy thing is really hot too. And I don't mean just with me. It would actually turn me on to see my H with a guy (not sex but touching and kissing) Is this wierd? I consider myself very sexual and my boundries tend to get blurred.
stoopid_guy Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 Nothing strange, but what's not wierd for you may be wierd for him. I also think men (in general) aren't nearly as likely to be open to same-sex encounters as women. Almost every man's secret fantasy is two ladies at once, but very few would want to share their lady with another guy.
rainfall Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 Everyone has different ideas of what they find sexy and of what turns them on. Personally for me I would never be comfortable sharing my man with another guy or girl. If you and your man find this idea sexy and a turn on then no I do not think it is strange.
littlekitty Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 Nothing strange, but what's not wierd for you may be wierd for him. Exactly! Many women like to watch 2 men together, but not that many straight men would be up for doing it!!
Adunaphel Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 I think it's a lot less weird than you'd think. I hear that it's a quite common fantasy. Kepp in mind, though, that fantasies and reality are very different things. Situations that are very hot as long as they are kept in Fantasyland can become very unconfortable if you try to experiment them in real life. What turns you on when you are fantasizing could very well be a majior turn off, or scare the hell out of you, if you actually tried it. So, if your fantasies came true, it is very possible that you wouldn't be able to handle them.
StayClose Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 Careful, this stuff could be a minefield. My wife and I used to talk about this stuff in theory, or while we were having sex. I even offered to do oral with another guy (the idea of which she finds hot) in exchange for permission from her to have vaginal sex with a women who was really hot. But then she brought up the idea of doing a threesome with a friend of hers, who happens to be really hot. Well, I thought the idea of a three-way with the two of them was really exciting, and that freaked her out. The only safe way to talk about this is to imagine non-existant fantasy people or celebrities - not people we know in really life. The understanding we've come to is that is this ever happens, it will be at a brothel outside Las Vagas. I'm not likely to have an affair behind her back with a prostitute who lives in a brothel 1000 miles away.
luvstarved Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 No it doesn't sound strange to me as a fantasy but again you need to be careful about the reality. Some people are perfectly okay with it in real life, others find they regret it. That's for you and your H to mutually decide. But FWIW I was in an "open marriage" when I was young and stupid and not only was the idea not a good one in general, as it turned out, it got particularly ugly when friends or anyone we had to run into on any regular basis became "fair game" so I agree with StayClose that you want to be able to keep it pretty distant! Good luck sorting it out.
Guest Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 My H and I (we're in our late 20's and been together for a long time) have been having little fantasy talks and we have joked about doing a threesome with a woman, then he says he wouldn't do it b/c I would want to do a 3some with a guy. So here's my question. Not only do I think the girl thing is hot (does this make me Bi?) but I think the guy thing is really hot too. And I don't mean just with me. It would actually turn me on to see my H with a guy (not sex but touching and kissing) Is this wierd? I consider myself very sexual and my boundries tend to get blurred. see I told the very person asking how to ask for a bj that there is great things that flow threw our minds as women!!!! let me tell you sweetie.. there is not a woman alive who has not had a dream or fantasy of a threesome!! if they tell you this they are lying and just dont want to admit it. they may not have acted on it but belive me they have thought of it at least once, old or young!!! as far as the bi thing goes, no I really think you are a sexual person and if your husband is game and you are as well then go for it. I would say though if it goes with a woman then he would have to go with the man as well so it could be said you both were not selfish. even though he is not ok with the man thing he would be if it were someone you did not know and will have to see again. just make sure you are safe.SAFE,SAFE,SAFE is the key word and then when is all said and done you may not embark on this journey ever again. However, you need to weigh the pro's and con's to this. can you see your h with another woman injoying himself, liking the other woman etc? are you strong enough in your relationship for this to happen? you wont be well after it is over you liked having her more than me etc? you must be prepared for this. it would be different if you were only dating and not in a relationship. talk to him about the guy thing tell him what you said here and I am sure he will come around.
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