D-Lish Posted September 12, 2006 Posted September 12, 2006 I dated a guy for a year- we had our ups and downs, although more ups than downs. The last couple months were rough, I lost my business and fell into a darker place. I was depressed and irritable and needy with my boyfriend. He eventually became frustrated and broke up with me over the phone about three weeks ago. Since then, he has not spoken to me once. I accepted the break up and have tried to move on, despite the fact that I love him deeply and feel torn up over mistreating him the past couple months. The problem is that he has my house keys, and I have a load of his stuff at my place. I have contacted him twice to come get his things and return my keys- but to no avail. He has not replied. The break up was a quick and cold conversation and he gave me no opportunity to have a say or ask any questions, just refused to talk about anything at all. That has left me feeling angry and confused and needing closure. Should I just have my locks changed and let it go? DO I have a right to feel upset that he has left his things here and won't remove them? I'd mail them to him but there is far too much to do that. It just bothers me because I want to move forward and his things are boxed up by my front door staring me in the face everyday. I have no insight into why someone would just fall off the face of the planet and refuse to complete unfinished business. I don't want to reconcile- but I do want to get some closure. Anyone have any thoughts as to how to handle this? Thanks.
Heart66 Posted September 16, 2006 Posted September 16, 2006 Hmmm? Sounds to me that there is more going on than he is letting on. He can't seem to muster up an explanation to give you closure?? That sounds a bit disrespectful to me. Under those circumstances...If it were me, I would text or call one more time, when I know he won't answer [don't want to talk to him...just passing a message] and let him know that I'd like his things removed from my home, and he needs to make arrangements to pick it up in a timely manner. If he continues to ignore your requests, I would then change the locks, and place his items at the curb for garbage pick up! DONE. As for closure--Im sorry to say that his not calling you IS your closure. If he can't respect simple requests, or show concern for your feelings-- Leave him be! I know NC hurts, and its hard [im going thru it myself] but in the long run, it is whats best. If its meant to be--it will be. Although you mentioned that you DON'T want to reconcile. So? If you mean that, that is all the more reason to stop looking at his boxes in your foyer and move on. Best of luck to you.
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