fabulousgal Posted September 9, 2006 Posted September 9, 2006 Ok, so I was doing quite alright for awhile. Lately, and this is with No Contact, I've been feeling very sad. This morning I almost started crying bc I was thinking about something he said to me a few weeks before we broke up. I got sad bc I remembered how genuine I thought he was and how I really trusted him. I wish I could take back my trust that I so openly gave. My first relationship was really bad but I was young. This was my second after many years. It really took a lot for me to open up. It was almost like he was coaxing me to believe in him, when I look back at some things. How was I to know it wasn't genuine on his behalf? I know I am not a victim, and this type of thing could and does happen to anyone. It's hard though not to feel like one, when you were manipulated and believed, and then dropped like a hot plate. To top it all off, my girlfriends befriended him afterwards. After he was decietful to me and led me on. Maybe I didn't deal with it the best way soon after, I did party a lot and socialized constantly. Now I am very involved with work and am starting to see through some people in this party crowd. Maybe that's why I am still waking up and able to become tearful over a jackass. Who knows.
superconductor Posted September 9, 2006 Posted September 9, 2006 You're entitled to feel sh*tty about this. But don't let it consume your every waking moment. Getting involved with other important aspects of your life, like work, friends and so forth is exactly the right prescription.
garnet Posted September 9, 2006 Posted September 9, 2006 fabgal, I know how you are feeling, and it's very confusing. My ex was the first time I had opened myself up to a man in years, and I trusted him completely. He coaxed it out of me also. I really thought it was going somewhere, and then BAM, he was gone. He is also business partners with one of my best friends. The three of us used to all be close, but I've had to distance myself from her also because of the pain of the association. She admits that what he did to me was rotten, but she is still close with him (and kind of has to be because of their work relationship). I cried over him last night after seeing this friend and hearing that my ex's father is dying. I don't really understand why I can still hurt over him after the way he treated me. Maybe because I feel so alone at this point in time (I too, am really involved in work because I just started my own company). I wish I had the answers for you...just know that you're not alone.
prrthd1 Posted September 9, 2006 Posted September 9, 2006 Yes, know that you aren't alone. I'm going through the same thing right now. I dated a guy for 2 or 3 months but I've known him for over 5 yrs. He was a trusted family friend. He treated me like a goddess and said things that made me think he was going to be in my life for a long time. Then, POOF. He said he needed a couple of weeks to slow down and regroup and then he would call me. That was 12 weeks ago and he is now seeing a very young girl that he knew before we even started dating. He voluntarily told me about her and that he wasn't interested in her and I believed him. I thought given the fact that he was so close to my family, he wouldn't lie to me that way. Silly me! So, I know what you are going through. I think in many ways someone pulling a disappearing act is harder than someone dying. If a loved one dies, you know the reason and you know that they can't come back. If someone vanishes on you this way, you sit and wonder why and live on the hope that they will return. IT SUCKS!
Recommended Posts