pickle Posted September 9, 2006 Posted September 9, 2006 Okay................ I tried my damnest tonight. We put some GREAT music on. Drinking a few bloody marys. We were talking, remeniscisning about our 20s, sharing some fun times, I asked him to kiss me.... (it sucked. clammy and lifeless) then one of "our favorite" songs came on...... (he has a phobia about dancing) but I said WHO CARES!!!! Just put your hand on my hip. This is PERFECT!" Then he went bipolar, as usual, on me...........he said... "**** YOU! I ASKED YOU A SIMPLE QUESTION. WHAT DO I DO!!!" I kept saying.... "What do you mean????????? you're doing good! It was perfect. I kept saying "Put your hand on my back! over and over! but you wouldnt! You NEVER listen!!!!!! What the F*CK is wrong with you?????? Why can't you EVER relax and have fun?????????" DAMNMIT! He is SUCH a stiff he can't just slow dance to simple classic. We are just TOO DAMN DIFFERENT. He is a social retard. Doesn't have an ounce of creativity or imagination in him. He is a loner. Over 14 yrs of knowing him I've always pushed people on him or he would have NO friends! He is SUCK A F*CKING LOSER!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM SO SICK OF THIS! HE F*CKING SUCKS! THIS SUCKS! I DON'T WANT HIM A-N-Y-M-O-R-E-!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We haven't had sex in 3-4 months. AS USUAL. And I don't even care anymore. I wanted him, pursued him, LONG after he stopped wanting me. Yet HE says "I'm not ready to give up on this relationship" WHAT?????????? WHAT AM I STILL HERE FOR?????????????????? HE F*CKING SUCKS!!!!!! Why have I been with him for 14 miserable, dispicable, vomitous YEARS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? PLEASE......... People...... ANYBODY! Are any of you like me? Once upon a time had the "love of a lifetime" promises and passion and intensity.........only to find you've been with a GODDAMN STINKING TOAD FOR YEARS AND YEARS????????????? Dammit......... I've made a terrible, costly, painful, 14 year mistake.
laRubiaBonita Posted September 9, 2006 Posted September 9, 2006 sooo. he is just a good "friend" , whom you cannot take to wedding 'cause the lack-of-dancing-skills thing. why stress?
Pink Amulet Posted September 9, 2006 Posted September 9, 2006 Ummm, are you okay? Jesus. Cut the poor guy some slack. If the passion isn't great enough for you. Leave.
Blackfrost Posted September 9, 2006 Posted September 9, 2006 We all have a right to vent from time to time - and we all make mistakes. Sounds to me like YOU are the one who made the mistake and are blaming him for not turning into what YOU wanted to turn him into. Over 14 yrs of knowing him I've always pushed people on him or he would have NO friends! He is SUCK A F*CKING LOSER!!!!!!!!!!!! That line right there proves my point. You tried to change someone from who they are, and you're too gutless to realize that it's YOUR fault that you're in a relationship that is totally not compatable. bah...I think i'm wasting my time on this thread. These type of people never want to accept that maybe they are the ones who screwed up - hence they blame their bitterness on others.
Adunaphel Posted September 9, 2006 Posted September 9, 2006 There is something more, isn't there? I see you posted this on the infidelity forum. Has he been cheating on you? We haven't had sex in 3-4 months. AS USUAL. And I don't even care anymore. I wanted him, pursued him, LONG after he stopped wanting me. Yet HE says "I'm not ready to give up on this relationship" WHAT?????????? Do you know what the reasons why he stopped desiring you are? (if there are any that you are aware of). Dammit......... I've made a terrible, costly, painful, 14 year mistake. When did things stop going well? Is it a relatively recent thing?
rainfall Posted September 9, 2006 Posted September 9, 2006 Wow..... well if he is so bad then leave him. You two are obviously not compataible. Also just because someone doesn't have a billion friends doesn't make them a loser. Some people are very happry having 2 or so close friends. Maybe if you didn't think he was a pathetic worthless loser then you 2 could get along better.
DarkShadows Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 Wow this is wow... I don't get why you're so upset?!? My boyfriend is a loner, so am I. I wouldn't push my boyfriend to be more social or whatnot. He doesn't like to dance and sometimes if I ask him to dance with me he won't. Yes it's a let down and hurts but I wouldn't curse or scream at him. FOR ****S SAKE! You need to relax. If he is uncomfortable doing something, then understand that and don't push him into becoming what YOU want him to be. He's still the same person he was when you met him. If you want change, try doing something together you never do but something you BOTH feel comfortable with. Maybe in a nice tone ask him why he doesn't like dancing. Or get him drunk and see if he's more open to the idea? But NEVER curse at him for not wanting to do something he is embarassed about. Jesus, are you trying to make him feel like a 2 year old boy? Leave if you don't like it. Hell I would've left you if I were in his shoes.
whichwayisup Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 So he doesn't dance. Get over it. And if you're that unhappy in your marriage, get a divorce and stop saying such AWFUL things about your husband. I could only imagine the things you say to his face after reading what you wrote here. Me thinks you're the one with the issues, not him.
blind_otter Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 You sound very angry. You are suffering very much. What has happened to make youhurt so badly?? What can youdo to alleviate this suffering? You could recognize that your partner is a person, who wants happiness and doesn't want suffering, as well. Also there are good and bad ways to communicate your needs. Swearing isn't a good idea, no matter what. Go easy on yourself. DO something to distract yourself until you calm down. Then think about the situation rationally. I hope you calm down.
LakesideDream Posted September 13, 2006 Posted September 13, 2006 How happy would you be if your Husband harbored the same feelings toward you? If you are so unsatisfied, file for divorce, take half the family assets, (and liabilities) and go find yourself a "party guy". You will find them at every streetcorner bar in your neighborhood.
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