Chibaby Posted September 5, 2006 Posted September 5, 2006 Got a scenario, Ineed help approaching a friend. A high school friend/roommate (Evil Girl) and I had a falling out a few years ago due to the fact that she set up a fake email account to try and get my boyfriend to cheat on me and screwed me over for money. All of our mutual friends stayed neutral not wanting to get involved. However, one of our mutual friends (Shannon) moved home from college and ended up rooming with Evil Girl. Shannon claimed that she was neutral, but she said she wasn't comfortable hanging out with me because I had a boyfriend which really hurt me and I didn't understand the logic in this (she recently broke up with hers). Plus, the fact that she is now living with Evil Girl puts a strain on our friendship. Every time I try calling her, she does not call me back. She claims cause I only call her when I'm partying anyway, which is not true. I have been good to her, taking her out to lunch, getting her and her new bf tickets to NBA games for free, and inviting her to concerts etc. I rarely hear back, and if I do, it's only through myspace or email. Also, I invited her to a concert recently, bought her ticket for her, and she ended up going with Evil Girl and not me. So recently, some girlfriends and I were out at a bar celebrating. So knowing that Evil Girl and I don't get along, she shows up with guess who at my celebration...yep Evil Girl. When Shannon asked me why I looked upset I told her. Not being the best situation to tell her, at a bar, drinking etc....we didn't' really have time to hash it out, but I basically told her that I thought it was pretty inconsiderate to bring evil girl, and especially not to give me a heads up first. I also told her that I was upset with her that she avoided my phone calls, chose to hang with Evil Girl over me, even when we'd make plans in advance. I had to leave before finishing the conversation, and I told her to call me so we could resolve it, but (of course) she never did. Instead she went to my other friends telling them how angry she was at me for letting her know what my feelings were. I understand that this is looking like a one-way friendship, and I know she's not a "true friend" per say, but we go pretty far back, and I'd like to maintain somewhat of a friendship with her, if only for the sake of our mutual friends. Looks like I will have to be the one to approach her. I don't want to be confrontational, but I want her to understand why I'm upset with the way she acts without seeming to harsh, and I want to speak with her directly-not gossip to others. I don't think it is wrong for friends to speak up when they are upset with one another, but she took it personally. What's a good approach to resolve this?
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