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GAH! I am so bad at this. Moving to the next step?


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Posted

So I've been hanging out a lot with this new girl. We have fun together and frequently walk to various places on campus (we're both college students). We have a lot in common in terms of hobbies and our love for culture/language/etc. The thing is, I really want to get more physically intimate and hopefully see if the relationship can go to a higher level. I have a hard time making a move... every night when it's late, we always have this awkward goodnight session where we go our separate ways to our rooms but never really say the right things. I feel like telling her to come sleep in my room is just totally obvious and tacky.

 

I mean is there a way to test her physical comfort or her desire to pursue something more without being too obvious? I'm a believer in natural gravitation but when it comes to crap like this, initiation needs to happen somehow, but I am just so bad at this initial jump (once I know it's ok, my fear is gone from that point onward). I just want to know a non-tacky non-obvious way to see if it's ok to get closer.

Posted

It sounds like you're skipping too far ahead. Do you actually want a relationship with this girl or do you just want to get into her pants? You can't just ask her into your room, either way.

 

If all you want is sex, make sure you make that clear to her.

Posted

Better make your move pretty soon, before she LJBFs you.

 

Take her gently by the shoulders. Look into her eyes. Give her a long, wet, succulent kiss. Her reaction will tell you if she's ready or interested.

Posted

From what you just said, it sounds like you two have potential. I know it's nerve-wracking, but for all you know, she's wishing you'd make a move already. I went on a couple dates with this guy once who did the awkward goodbye thing several times, and while I wanted him to kiss me, I was too scared to make a move. Bottom line: you're gonna have to put yourself out there, otherwise you'll be left wondering what it would've been like.

Posted
Better make your move pretty soon, before she LJBFs you.

 

Take her gently by the shoulders. Look into her eyes. Give her a long, wet, succulent kiss. Her reaction will tell you if she's ready or interested.

 

Bingo....do this and fast...LJBF is approaching! :eek:

Posted

Do you hug her hello and good bye? It might be a good starting point. Also pay lots of attention to her body language. Say you hug her and she hugs you back closely and tightly, that's a sign that you may be able to get a kiss next time, but if she stays back and just sort of pats you on the back, she may not be interested in getting physical.

Posted

Why not do something that can easily lead into something physical, but isn't necessarily about that. You know, give her a massage or something. Or take her to a romantic dinner for two, touch hands and take it from there. Or just go to a bar, get drunk, and make out.

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Posted

This girl's in my bed right now as we speak. She's asleep though. Said she could crash at my place. I'm a failure at this stuff.

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